format_quote Originally Posted by
talibilm
:sl:
Juma & Eid & jamat (fard) is forgiven for a traveller or a sick or in fear
too late. i already went. i prayed the jamaat prayer outside with my own prayer rug with all the men, while the ladies prayed inside the tiny masjid. just like i feared, there was fitnah. while the imam was giving the khutbah, i would look at the street/parking lot from time to time to see if there were any girls passing by, and occasionally i would stare if i saw one. once, i saw a girl i had an encounter with once, and she looked at me as if uncomfortable, knowing she was being stared at, and ran away out of sight. when i went to the cafeteria, there was no barrier between the men's section and women's section, however, men and women were still expected to sit separately, with the exception of my sister and my brother-in-law, who sat with my mother and I at a table in the middle. My sister, being a schoolteacher, had a coworker, who I saw as a big sister, come sit with us, and I asked her about how her younger sister was doing. the younger sister is 3 years older than me. I then asked if i could date her when im in college, and she smilingly said, "no.....she's about to graduate....she's older than you." my mother laughed it off, taking it as a joke. i went outside purposely to see if there were girls i could talk to. i saw a 13 year old girl i once told my feelings for. i said, as she was walking away, "Hi,____" and she said nervously, "Hi!" and I said "How are you?" and she said, "Good." and rushed off with her friend. I was going to ask her how her 'boyfriend' was doing, since she told me when i told her my feelings for her she liked another boy, and i saw she was following an american boy on instagram. I wanted to see if she got rejected. I stared at three girls, all of whom likely hated me due to my inappropriate comments/actions and/or my being pushy or that one time i lost my temper with them. they were on the other side, so I couldn't go talk to them.......i was waiting for them to leave the cafeteria, but they never did. once, i was on the outside, and one girl was standing in the doorway for women, but i stopped myself from saying something, likely out of shyness and shame.