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Kawlah
10-06-2017, 12:48 PM
Salaam brothers and sisters :statisfie


I am a revert sister who has suffered from mental illness and has lost her iman several times through this. I went through phases of belief or disbelief according to my mental state.


I am not sure what to do, I have said shahada multiple times in my life because I apostated and then came back. I have lost my muslim contacts in my area because I have been so unstable in my past.
Now, my mental issues have been under control for about a two year period and I want to come back into the community. But how do I do this?

I have said shahada today, done Ghusl and prayed salat al Duhr.


I know there's a hadith that says that when you are insane the pen is lifted (ie the sins are not recorded) but I feel very ashamed and guilty regardless.


So what should I do now to return to the deen? I live in the Netherlands, are there any sisters here that would want to help me knowing my history?
Reply

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happymuslim
10-06-2017, 02:43 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam brothers and sisters :statisfie


I am a revert sister who has suffered from mental illness and has lost her iman several times through this. I went through phases of belief or disbelief according to my mental state.


I am not sure what to do, I have said shahada multiple times in my life because I apostated and then came back. I have lost my muslim contacts in my area because I have been so unstable in my past.
Now, my mental issues have been under control for about a two year period and I want to come back into the community. But how do I do this?

I have said shahada today, done Ghusl and prayed salat al Duhr.


I know there's a hadith that says that when you are insane the pen is lifted (ie the sins are not recorded) but I feel very ashamed and guilty regardless.


So what should I do now to return to the deen? I live in the Netherlands, are there any sisters here that would want to help me knowing my history?
Take it easy, whatever your complicating, try to go easy on yourself, have faith in islam, have hope in Allah and is mercy, connect with your fellow muslims and find a source of peace. Also follow motivating insta accounts and watch motivational Islamic videos to brighten ur day. [emoji5][emoji4] may allah separate you and your sadness like he has separated the two seas. Ameen
Reply

talibilm
10-06-2017, 03:17 PM
Salam Sister.

why did you loose your eeman?, please specify reasons so that inshaallah we will try to clear your doubts.
Reply

Kawlah
10-06-2017, 03:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by talibilm
Salam Sister.

why did you loose your eeman?, please specify reasons so that inshaallah we will try to clear your doubts.
My main problem is that I have PTSD (Post traumatic stress disorder) because my father is abusive. And when I am in a downward spiral mentally, the parts about the punishment of Hell and Allah's wrath make me feel confused and upset because they remind me of the abuse my father inflicted of me. That makes me doubt my faith most of all.

I have been receiving treatment for my PTSD the past three years though, and I haven't been in a downward spiral for a year now Alhamdoelilah so that's why I am trying again to practice my faith. I just hope I can prevent it from happening again.
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Kawlah
10-06-2017, 04:42 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by happymuslim
Take it easy, whatever your complicating, try to go easy on yourself, have faith in islam, have hope in Allah and is mercy, connect with your fellow muslims and find a source of peace. Also follow motivating insta accounts and watch motivational Islamic videos to brighten ur day. [emoji5][emoji4] may allah separate you and your sadness like he has separated the two seas. Ameen
Ameen to your dua and thank you for your kind words, JazzakAllah Khair :)
Reply

M.I.A.
10-06-2017, 04:45 PM
If you can find the patience to persevere then you will get through whatever it is that you go through..

And if it brings benefit to any of the people that you are associated with then surely it will count in your favour at some point.

https://youtu.be/XUgD91WrSFg

We all have times of hardship but over time, hopefully they wont be times of doubt.
Reply

talibilm
10-07-2017, 12:00 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
My main problem is that I have PTSD (Post traumatic stress disorder) because my father is abusive. And when I am in a downward spiral mentally, the parts about the punishment of Hell and Allah's wrath make me feel confused and upset because they remind me of the abuse my father inflicted of me. That makes me doubt my faith most of all.

I have been receiving treatment for my PTSD the past three years though, and I haven't been in a downward spiral for a year now Alhamdoelilah so that's why I am trying again to practice my faith. I just hope I can prevent it from happening again.
Sister, having less knowledge of Allah & islam is also a cause for your confusion. Loosing hope on the MERCY OF ALLAH is the trait of Mushrik because you had downgraded Allah's Mercy . Do you know hadith that say Allah forgave a killer of 99 people ?

There are many many hadiths on the mercy of Allah so scroll in hadith and learn to keep faith & trust on Allah . But that does not mean we freely engage in sins that will be a trap of Shaitan since Allah also says this

'' And [remember] when your Lord proclaimed, 'If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]; but if you deny, indeed,My punishmentis severe. ''

So about your father being tough , forget about the past for he could have done out of anger (anger makes a person go mad) out of too much love for his daughter and her welfare but be patient Allah will reward you and dua to Allah to give hidayah to your father, but its the father's dua that there is no curtain behind Allah & the father .

Is your father a Muslim ? But if he get crazy remind him Allah does not like Transgressors and Allah will punish those who go beyond limits , so let your father be afraid of Allah.
Reply

greenhill
10-07-2017, 06:14 AM
Salam..

We all have doubts. Even Rasulullah had doubts. While having doubts is good to keep us in check, but over contemplation of it may cause you to freeze, meaning you 'analyse until you paralyse' and that is not good.

Know one thing.. or two things.. Allah is Most Merciful and Most Forgiving. If you crawl to Him, He Runs to you.

I tell myself this; I cannot control my heart's desires or feelings but what I can control are my thoughts and actions. There are days when I feel lazy and my desire is to do other things but I can choose to indulge in laziness or get up and sort out what needs to be done and do not get involved with the internal debate, so to speak.

We are commanded to pray 5 times a day, and it is hard to believe that anyone will willingly want to do it every time for his entire life. So, we either do it willingly or unwillingly (still doing it) and not not doing it.

Ultimately, everyone is at a different place. I have no doubt with regards to Allah and the deen. My only problem is worldly matters. It is enough to distract me. When my eeman is low, it just means that I loosen my principles a bit, it does not mean that I forget Allah and the sin. Perhaps for that moment I (from the lack of comprehension) I resign myself to the consequences.. But I don't lose faith. Don't lose yours.


:peace:
Reply

Scimitar
10-08-2017, 12:13 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam brothers and sisters :statisfie


I am a revert sister who has suffered from mental illness and has lost her iman several times through this. I went through phases of belief or disbelief according to my mental state.


I am not sure what to do, I have said shahada multiple times in my life because I apostated and then came back. I have lost my muslim contacts in my area because I have been so unstable in my past.
Now, my mental issues have been under control for about a two year period and I want to come back into the community. But how do I do this?

I have said shahada today, done Ghusl and prayed salat al Duhr.


I know there's a hadith that says that when you are insane the pen is lifted (ie the sins are not recorded) but I feel very ashamed and guilty regardless.


So what should I do now to return to the deen? I live in the Netherlands, are there any sisters here that would want to help me knowing my history?
I knew a girl by the name of Odette who lived in Netherlands and she too became a Muslim and took the name Khawlah, and then apostated - it aint you is it?
Reply

rozyred
10-08-2017, 05:49 AM
Firstly am very sorry to hear about ur mental disorder. At the same time, I'm glad u regret and come back which shows your internal Imaan is strong that reminds you about the bad deeds you do. Allah is most Merciful, He will accept ur duas and apologies. We'll keep praying that you find a good company. Also we are at your service f you need any help or advice.
Reply

Kawlah
10-10-2017, 02:03 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Scimitar
I knew a girl by the name of Odette who lived in Netherlands and she too became a Muslim and took the name Khawlah, and then apostated - it aint you is it?
Salaam Mo,

Yes, it is me. I figured you might be here. I told you then too that I had mental issues, but everyone seemed to downplay them until they surfaced and then went berserk on me for not being a 'troll' and ''fake'' because I was being unstable as I had said I might be.

I had warned everyone previously. I left the community because all I got was insults while nobody of them ever had really met me.

But I don't feel like I have anything to hide. So, how are you doing?

- - - Updated - - -

format_quote Originally Posted by talibilm
Sister, having less knowledge of Allah & islam is also a cause for your confusion. Loosing hope on the MERCY OF ALLAH is the trait of Mushrik because you had downgraded Allah's Mercy . Do you know hadith that say Allah forgave a killer of 99 people ?

There are many many hadiths on the mercy of Allah so scroll in hadith and learn to keep faith & trust on Allah . But that does not mean we freely engage in sins that will be a trap of Shaitan since Allah also says this

'' And [remember] when your Lord proclaimed, 'If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]; but if you deny, indeed,My punishmentis severe. ''

So about your father being tough , forget about the past for he could have done out of anger (anger makes a person go mad) out of too much love for his daughter and her welfare but be patient Allah will reward you and dua to Allah to give hidayah to your father, but its the father's dua that there is no curtain behind Allah & the father .

Is your father a Muslim ? But if he get crazy remind him Allah does not like Transgressors and Allah will punish those who go beyond limits , so let your father be afraid of Allah.
Salaam. No, I am a convert. None of my family are muslims, which complicates matters as they push(ed) me very hard to stay away from religion alltogether.

I have forgiven my father long ago, and am awaiting his proposal to talk to me. My door is open but so far he rejects it. But I don't have ptsd symptoms because I hold on to anger, it's just there off and on. It does complicate my relationship with Allah, I am trying to see Him seperate from human traits but it's been very difficult at times without a community to support me.

- - - Updated - - -

format_quote Originally Posted by rozyred
Firstly am very sorry to hear about ur mental disorder. At the same time, I'm glad u regret and come back which shows your internal Imaan is strong that reminds you about the bad deeds you do. Allah is most Merciful, He will accept ur duas and apologies. We'll keep praying that you find a good company. Also we are at your service f you need any help or advice.
Salaam, Alhamdoelilah I keep coming back but I also keep going so far which is the problematic part of this. Thank you so much for praying for me!
Reply

Hamza Asadullah
10-10-2017, 02:15 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam brothers and sisters :statisfie


I am a revert sister who has suffered from mental illness and has lost her iman several times through this. I went through phases of belief or disbelief according to my mental state.


I am not sure what to do, I have said shahada multiple times in my life because I apostated and then came back. I have lost my muslim contacts in my area because I have been so unstable in my past.
Now, my mental issues have been under control for about a two year period and I want to come back into the community. But how do I do this?

I have said shahada today, done Ghusl and prayed salat al Duhr.


I know there's a hadith that says that when you are insane the pen is lifted (ie the sins are not recorded) but I feel very ashamed and guilty regardless.


So what should I do now to return to the deen? I live in the Netherlands, are there any sisters here that would want to help me knowing my history?
:sl:

It seems you are suffering from Waswas (Insinuating Whispers from shaythan) with regards to your Imaan (faith). Most of these thoughts are completely irrational and are a test for us. If you believe in Allah and his Messenger and have proclaimed the Shahada then you are a Muslim regardless of any irrational thoughts telling you otherwise. So the best thing is to keep telling yourself that these are irrational thoughts and making the relevant supplications like "Audhu Billahi Minashaythanirajeem" etc.

Do you suffer from OCD? Are you getting any type of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?

The following thread has many useful articles, lectures and resources to help those who are getting insinuating whispers of shaythan with regards to their Imaan and in their worship:

How to overcome Waswas (Shaythans whispers) in worship

Please let us know if you require any further help or advice with anything at all.
Reply

Kawlah
10-10-2017, 04:04 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Hamza Asadullah
:sl:

It seems you are suffering from Waswas (Insinuating Whispers from shaythan) with regards to your Imaan (faith). Most of these thoughts are completely irrational and are a test for us. If you believe in Allah and his Messenger and have proclaimed the Shahada then you are a Muslim regardless of any irrational thoughts telling you otherwise. So the best thing is to keep telling yourself that these are irrational thoughts and making the relevant supplications like "Audhu Billahi Minashaythanirajeem" etc.

Do you suffer from OCD? Are you getting any type of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?

The following thread has many useful articles, lectures and resources to help those who are getting insinuating whispers of shaythan with regards to their Imaan and in their worship:

How to overcome Waswas (Shaythans whispers) in worship

Please let us know if you require any further help or advice with anything at all.
Wow brother this hits very close to home! JazzakAllah Khair :)

And I am getting cognitive behavioural therapy currently indeed. I don't have OCD but I do have Aspergers and their symptoms overlap frequently.

Thanks for the link. This is the first piece of info on an Islamic website that describes exactly what happens to me, the piece about a woman who said Shahada each day for 16 years was very close to home. I keep feeling that I am not enough of a believer too, no matter what I do.

I will take this to heart and learn more about what I can do against Waswas.
Reply

Hamza Asadullah
10-10-2017, 04:16 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Wow brother this hits very close to home! JazzakAllah Khair :)

And I am getting cognitive behavioural therapy currently indeed. I don't have OCD but I do have Aspergers and their symptoms overlap frequently.

Thanks for the link. This is the first piece of info on an Islamic website that describes exactly what happens to me, the piece about a woman who said Shahada each day for 16 years was very close to home. I keep feeling that I am not enough of a believer too, no matter what I do.

I will take this to heart and learn more about what I can do against Waswas.
My sister know that this can happen to any of us even the strongest of believers. So do not feel alone in this as many of us are going through similar trials. Turn to Allah and ask of him to aide you particularly in the latter part of the night at Tahajjud time. Remember that He tests those he wants closest to him.

The cognitive behavior therapy will help inshaAllah as well as positive reinforcement and continuously telling yourself that these are irrational negative thoughts from your enemy shaythan who just wants to constantly feed you negative thoughts, put you down and make you feel like you are not a believer and that your worship will not be accepted. These whispers are completely false and eventually you will learn to ignore them.
Reply

Scimitar
10-11-2017, 10:41 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam Mo,

Yes, it is me. I figured you might be here. I told you then too that I had mental issues, but everyone seemed to downplay them until they surfaced and then went berserk on me for not being a 'troll' and ''fake'' because I was being unstable as I had said I might be.

I had warned everyone previously. I left the community because all I got was insults while nobody of them ever had really met me.

But I don't feel like I have anything to hide. So, how are you doing?
Aw Khawlah, ma sh'Allah, it's great to see you here! I'm sorry to hear how you have suffered through this, I know you and know your issues. More than anything, I'm so happy you have made your way here and are posting. Sister, you've been missed and wallahi, it's so amazing to know it is you. Allah is truly the greatest, incomparable. I made dua that we would talk again. It wasn't long ago when I was thinking about how you put me in my place lol, rare to see that happen, and wonderful to know there are strong minded, logical, no BS sisters online who can corner me in dialectical terms. You got something which not many people have sister - integrity. And I know it. Ma sh'Allah.

Soooo, how have you been sis? :)
Reply

Kawlah
10-12-2017, 06:01 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Scimitar
Aw Khawlah, ma sh'Allah, it's great to see you here! I'm sorry to hear how you have suffered through this, I know you and know your issues. More than anything, I'm so happy you have made your way here and are posting. Sister, you've been missed and wallahi, it's so amazing to know it is you. Allah is truly the greatest, incomparable. I made dua that we would talk again. It wasn't long ago when I was thinking about how you put me in my place lol, rare to see that happen, and wonderful to know there are strong minded, logical, no BS sisters online who can corner me in dialectical terms. You got something which not many people have sister - integrity. And I know it. Ma sh'Allah.

Soooo, how have you been sis? :)
Wa salaam aleikoem wa barakathoe, Scimi :)

How have I been other than apostating? Fine Masha'Allah! I have not had the best year religion-wise, but I have had a great year stabilizing my mental issues Alhamdoelilah and that's why now I've gone out to search for Allah once again. I'm pretty confident this time I got myself in check Insha'Allah.

Wallahi I am sorry for how I treated you, there were a lot of people backbiting each other in the community and I avoided talking to you because of the slander but out of all of them I think you are the most sincere because you don't do the nice person thing when you don't mean it. So forgive me please.

Hope you are well. Seems things are pretty broken up at that other board, I won't come back there anyway because people have decided that everything I did was 'fake'. It wasn't fake, but they have no idea how hard being a convert can be when you have absolutely zero support and other issues to deal with as well. Insha'Allah I will get there this time.

I have a secret Facebook account, I will like Dawah Digital on there and give you a shout Insha'Allah. Thank you for being open minded enough to talk to me.

- - - Updated - - -

format_quote Originally Posted by Hamza Asadullah
My sister know that this can happen to any of us even the strongest of believers. So do not feel alone in this as many of us are going through similar trials. Turn to Allah and ask of him to aide you particularly in the latter part of the night at Tahajjud time. Remember that He tests those he wants closest to him.

The cognitive behavior therapy will help inshaAllah as well as positive reinforcement and continuously telling yourself that these are irrational negative thoughts from your enemy shaythan who just wants to constantly feed you negative thoughts, put you down and make you feel like you are not a believer and that your worship will not be accepted. These whispers are completely false and eventually you will learn to ignore them.
Thank you for this and your other posts bro, they are very inspiring and give me hope. Insha'Allah one day I will live up to my chosen name.
Reply

Kawlah
10-12-2017, 04:43 PM
Salaam all just a little update :)

I have prayed al Isthikara this weekend about becoming a practicing muslim and doing shahada, and I've been called today by a mosque that I had sent a request a while ago but never heard of. They invite me for a training for convert women, Alhamdoelilah!


It starts in four weeks. So I will get to meet some sisters Alhamdoelilah.

I told them that I want to do their training but that there are some issues with my Tawheed and Iman, and I am now getting an appointment next week with a convert sister and an Imam to help me with with my issues.. Alhamdoelilah.
I am sorry I still did not read your recommended book, but Masha'Allah things are in motion for me now. So happy, I feel like my prayer has been answered :)
Reply

Umm Malik
10-12-2017, 08:56 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam all just a little update :)

I have prayed al Isthikara this weekend about becoming a practicing muslim and doing shahada, and I've been called today by a mosque that I had sent a request a while ago but never heard of. They invite me for a training for convert women, Alhamdoelilah!


It starts in four weeks. So I will get to meet some sisters Alhamdoelilah.

I told them that I want to do their training but that there are some issues with my Tawheed and Iman, and I am now getting an appointment next week with a convert sister and an Imam to help me with with my issues.. Alhamdoelilah.
I am sorry I still did not read your recommended book, but Masha'Allah things are in motion for me now. So happy, I feel like my prayer has been answered :)
welcome to Islam again and welcome to Islam
any help I am here
please feel me as one of your sisters
may Allah gather us in jannah
Reply

Kawlah
10-13-2017, 07:58 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Umm Malik
welcome to Islam again and welcome to Islam
any help I am here
please feel me as one of your sisters
may Allah gather us in jannah

Salaam and thank you sis! I will keep it in mind for when I can send PM's.

And thank you too Scimi, it was nice catching up :)
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eesa the kiwi
10-13-2017, 09:54 AM
Welcome back sister
May Allah make things easy for you
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Kawlah
10-13-2017, 03:50 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by eesa the kiwi
Welcome back sister
May Allah make things easy for you
Salaam sis and thanks for the well wishes!

Allah is making my situation easier by the minute.. I see very clear signs Alhamdoelilah. My mom asked me about shariah rights for women today and we talked about it for two hours, never had such an open conversation with her about and she liked it.. Maybe Allah will open a door for me and her. Jumah Mubarak :)
Reply

eesa the kiwi
10-14-2017, 03:34 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam sis and thanks for the well wishes!

Allah is making my situation easier by the minute.. I see very clear signs Alhamdoelilah. My mom asked me about shariah rights for women today and we talked about it for two hours, never had such an open conversation with her about and she liked it.. Maybe Allah will open a door for me and her. Jumah Mubarak :)
Wa alaikum salam rahmatulah wa barakatu lol I'm a brother

Alhamdulilah that's good about your mum may Allah guide her through you
Reply

Scimitar
10-14-2017, 08:29 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by eesa the kiwi
Wa alaikum salam rahmatulah wa barakatu lol I'm a brother

Alhamdulilah that's good about your mum may Allah guide her through you
ameen!!!
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cinnamonrolls1
11-01-2017, 06:09 PM
Salam sister
First of all i wanted to say your story inspired me. After all this struggle you cake back to your deen do you know how incredible that it?
As for how to improve your deen, engage with it. Read the Quran and the hadith,listen to lectures, Read about it etc. Follow motivational social media accounts. if you ever need someone to talk to, Im here, just send me a private message and il reply :)
Reply

Kawlah
11-03-2017, 04:15 PM
Salaam Ale3koem sis Cinna,

Thanks for your encouraging words. Can use them and will take up on your offer :)
Reply

OmAbdullah
11-03-2017, 07:05 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by greenhill
Salam..

We all have doubts. Even Rasulullah had doubts. While having doubts is good to keep us in check, but over contemplation of it may cause you to freeze, meaning you 'analyse until you paralyse' and that is not good.

Know one thing.. or two things.. Allah is Most Merciful and Most Forgiving. If you crawl to Him, He Runs to you.

I tell myself this; I cannot control my heart's desires or feelings but what I can control are my thoughts and actions. There are days when I feel lazy and my desire is to do other things but I can choose to indulge in laziness or get up and sort out what needs to be done and do not get involved with the internal debate, so to speak.

We are commanded to pray 5 times a day, and it is hard to believe that anyone will willingly want to do it every time for his entire life. So, we either do it willingly or unwillingly (still doing it) and not not doing it.

Ultimately, everyone is at a different place. I have no doubt with regards to Allah and the deen. My only problem is worldly matters. It is enough to distract me. When my eeman is low, it just means that I loosen my principles a bit, it does not mean that I forget Allah and the sin. Perhaps for that moment I (from the lack of comprehension) I resign myself to the consequences.. But I don't lose faith. Don't lose yours.


:peace:

Assalaamo alaykum


Your answer is good especially when you made it clear that you don't have doubts with regard to Allah and Deen. BUT you said something about Muhammad salla Allaho alaihi wa sallam and didn't clearify along with evidence what you meant. It is not a light matter to say something about Muhammad salla Allaho alaihi wa sallam which we do not know. So please make it clear about what he salla Allaho alaihi wa sallam had doubts?
Reply

OmAbdullah
11-03-2017, 08:13 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Kawlah
Salaam brothers and sisters


I am a revert sister who has suffered from mental illness and has lost her iman several times through this. I went through phases of belief or disbelief according to my mental state.


I am not sure what to do, I have said shahada multiple times in my life because I apostated and then came back. I have lost my muslim contacts in my area because I have been so unstable in my past.
Now, my mental issues have been under control for about a two year period and I want to come back into the community. But how do I do this?

I have said shahada today, done Ghusl and prayed salat al Duhr.


I know there's a hadith that says that when you are insane the pen is lifted (ie the sins are not recorded) but I feel very ashamed and guilty regardless.


So what should I do now to return to the deen? I live in the Netherlands, are there any sisters here that would want to help me knowing my history?

Assalamo alaykum


If you became confused during your illness then Allah is the Forgiving Merciful, you know that when a person's mind stops normal working, the angels put the pen down.

One thing important I must remind you. I have seen such cases where a father or both parents become so selfish, especially when they want to make a capable, earning and sincere daughter, an object of sacrifice for the benefits of their sons, then they practice all types of injustices, both verbal and practical. Thus the sincere daughter becomes internally wounded. At such occasions, if she comes across such hadeeth which makes father equal to God (May Allah protect us from shirk, aameen. There is no true hadeeth making a father or husband equal to God.), then Satan will attack the wounded mind and heart of the suffering daughter putting her in doubt about the Justice of Allah. So she, if ignorant from religion, will become angry about Allah's Commands.


Here I want to tell you that Allah's Justice is very pure and impartial. Such father and mother will surely be judged. Then the daughter will be given reward and parents will not escape the Justice of Allah. Please remember that it is the justice of Allah which will admit people to Hell. When such sincere daughter comes to know from the Quraan and Sunnah that her father and/or mother are in danger of the Hell-Fire, she starts crying for them and all of her anger goes away.



Thus when Satan turns your anger from your father to Allah, you must think and believe in the impartial justice of Allah from which even an unjust father and mother cannot find refuge.

- - - Updated - - -

format_quote Originally Posted by talibilm
Sister,


but its the father's dua that there is no curtain behind Allah & the father .
Assalaamo alaykum

"No curtain between father and Allah" is a fully wrong statement. Allah spoke even to the Prophets alaihim salaam, from behind a curtain.


If you mean that no curtain between Allah and father's du'aa, then please bring full hadeeth with evidence.

I read that there is no curtain between Allah and the du'aa of mazloom (the oppressed one). In this thread, the cause of a daughter's loosing eemaan is the oppression from father. So the daughter is oppressed (mazloom) and the father is the oppressor up to such extent that he is attacking her eemaan. Do you think the father is given high position in Islam just blindly?
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Kawlah
11-04-2017, 09:45 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by OmAbdullah
Assalamo alaykum


If you became confused during your illness then Allah is the Forgiving Merciful, you know that when a person's mind stops normal working, the angels put the pen down.
Salaam Ale3koem,
Thank you sister, sadly my illness will be with me for life but it makes it easier to realize that when it hits me the angels put their pen down. Insha´Allah it will leave me some day.

format_quote Originally Posted by OmAbdullah
One thing important I must remind you. I have seen such cases where a father or both parents become so selfish, especially when they want to make a capable, earning and sincere daughter, an object of sacrifice for the benefits of their sons, then they practice all types of injustices, both verbal and practical. Thus the sincere daughter becomes internally wounded. At such occasions, if she comes across such hadeeth which makes father equal to God (May Allah protect us from shirk, aameen. There is no true hadeeth making a father or husband equal to God.), then Satan will attack the wounded mind and heart of the suffering daughter putting her in doubt about the Justice of Allah. So she, if ignorant from religion, will become angry about Allah's Commands.
That is indeed what happened to me sister, I have no brothers or sisters but my father has abused and rejected me from a young age and there are several hadith stating that those who break the bonds with their parents will go to hell etc. But allowing my father near me means that he is truly dangerous to me, and I did not break our bond. I have invited him to see me, on the term that he and I go into counselling to work on our relationship. He refuses though, and hasn´t contacted me since even though he can.

So I guess that hadith doesn´t go for me as I do give my father the option to be in touch with me but he rejects it, but indeed it does make me doubt and worry often that I am not doing enough for him by not letting myself be abused anymore. But like you said Allah is the most just, and would be strange if Allah condoned parents who abuse their children. I guess that hadith is about people who abandon their parents without good reason.

format_quote Originally Posted by OmAbdullah
Here I want to tell you that Allah's Justice is very pure and impartial. Such father and mother will surely be judged. Then the daughter will be given reward and parents will not escape the Justice of Allah. Please remember that it is the justice of Allah which will admit people to Hell. When such sincere daughter comes to know from the Quraan and Sunnah that her father and/or mother are in danger of the Hell-Fire, she starts crying for them and all of her anger goes away.
I pray for my father, I want him to come to me and I ask Allah to open a door for him to repetance every day. But I can´t do much more without damaging myself. It makes me sad.


format_quote Originally Posted by OmAbdullah
Thus when Satan turns your anger from your father to Allah, you must think and believe in the impartial justice of Allah from which even an unjust father and mother cannot find refuge.
Thank you. What happens mostly is that Shaytan tries to cloud my opinion of Allah by saying if your father torments you, why can Allah send people to hell if He´s good? But when I am not weighed down by stress, I do realize that Allah will always be a neutral judge and nothing like my father.

I truly hope my father will choose to change. His life now makes me sad, for now and the hereafter. He has not much hope if he keeps going like this :hmm:

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