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shila
01-17-2018, 12:58 PM
Is it something bad of being a shy and quite person in Islam? Is there any obligation to always get along with people or having more interaction with people in social intercourse? Such as gathering and hangouts, what if one's just not really into it and feel uncomfortable with it, should it be changed? Need advice.
Thanks in advance.
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sister herb
01-17-2018, 01:51 PM
You can´t to be anything else than yourself and such as personality like you are. We all are different, some shy and some not. Nothing bad to be introverted at all. But our societies might put more value for those whose are social and talkative. Don´t try to change yourself if different kind of behaving doesn´t feel comfortable.
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shila
01-17-2018, 02:00 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by sister herb
You can´t to be anything else than yourself and such as personality like you are. We all are different, some shy and some not. Nothing bad to be introverted at all. But our societies might put more value for those whose are social and talkative. Don´t try to change yourself if different kind of behaving doesn´t feel comfortable.
I totally agree with you.
But the thing is my mother keep bragging on me about how I don't involved in with relatives and all. While I did my best to get along and be nice to them, she keeps saying that it wasn't enough.
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azc
01-17-2018, 02:07 PM
Narrated Abdullah ibn Umar (ra): The Prophet passed by a man who was admonishing his brother regarding Haya and was saying, “You are very shy, and I am afraid that might harm you.” On that, Allah’s Apostle said, “Leave him, for Haya is (a part) of Faith.” (Bukhari)
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sister herb
01-17-2018, 02:50 PM
Then it seems that problem is not your way to behave but your mother´s way to think. You should try to explain that personality is quite permanent part of yourself with biological base and if you have introversion temperament, it´s quite hard to change. I advice you to read more about those personal types so you know what to talk with her. Like note that people are not only introverted or extroverted but many are something between of them, "ambiverted".

(Funny but I have just read about those things last days as I am studying as practical nurse and those matters belongs to my studies.)
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shila
01-17-2018, 03:08 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by sister herb
Then it seems that problem is not your way to behave but your mother´s way to think. You should try to explain that personality is quite permanent part of yourself with biological base and if you have introversion temperament, it´s quite hard to change. I advice you to read more about those personal types so you know what to talk with her. Like note that people are not only introverted or extroverted but many are something between of them, "ambiverted".

(Funny but I have just read about those things last days as I am studying as practical nurse and those matters belongs to my studies.)
I'm afraid that the introverted is all I got. Thus, it can't be changed. :(
And it happens to be her negative thoughts about introverted isn't a good personality to keep, is that she may terrified about me and my future, that I can't have a good life so on.
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shila
01-17-2018, 03:10 PM
But thanks for the advice :)
I hope someday she'll understand that
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sister herb
01-17-2018, 03:33 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by shila
I'm afraid that the introverted is all I got. Thus, it can't be changed. :(
Remember that even every person´s personal type is something you got while you was born, life might change you a little more social. With someones, being introverted might mean that they sometimes need time to be alone, like "charge their batteries" before they again can be as social as it feels good for them. There is no prove that introverted people couldn´t have "a good life".

;)
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