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Studentofdeed
10-03-2018, 11:52 PM
I am in a situation. When we wrong others and hurt others we have to ask forgiveness. We also should forgive people in order to be forgiven by Allah. I asked forgiveness from everyone I hurt and those I cant find I make dua for them. I have also forgive everyone who hurt me except one. This person who hurt me has not apologized or attempted to make up for the damage they caused. Am I obligated to forgive them in order for Allah to forigve or will allah forgive me since I forgave everyone else. I have forgiven people who do not even deserve it but this one person who crossed the threshold. I feel like a hypocrite and I am worried and do not know what to do. Will allah punish this person who hurt me? Will allah forgive me for my transgressions against others?
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azc
10-04-2018, 10:05 AM
If you forgive this man, insha Allah you will be rewarded in akhirah but if you don't, then transgressor will be punished but you will get nothing for getting him punished
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Ümit
10-04-2018, 10:48 AM
Originally Posted by Studentofdeed
I am in a situation. When we wrong others and hurt others we have to ask forgiveness. We also should forgive people in order to be forgiven by Allah. I asked forgiveness from everyone I hurt and those I cant find I make dua for them. I have also forgive everyone who hurt me except one. This person who hurt me has not apologized or attempted to make up for the damage they caused. Am I obligated to forgive them in order for Allah to forigve or will allah forgive me since I forgave everyone else. I have forgiven people who do not even deserve it but this one person who crossed the threshold. I feel like a hypocrite and I am worried and do not know what to do. Will allah punish this person who hurt me? Will allah forgive me for my transgressions against others?
We do not have such an obligation to forgive people. you can forgive if you want...its completely up to yourself.

BUT...

Like AZC said...if you do not forgive...then this other person will be punished...and you will get a decent compensation for it...and of course you will get your revenge because justice has been served.

The alternative is...you forgive this person...this person will not get punished...and instead of this compensation and revenge, you will get a reward much much greater than that.

So forgiving is always better, but again...it is your personal choice.


Second, The claim "We also should forgive people in order to be forgiven by Allah" is not true. Allah will forgive you...even if you do not forgive others...But if you have wronged others, then Allah orders us to ask forgiveness from that person before asking Allah for forgiveness...that because If Allah forgives you just like that it will be injustice towards that other.

You are not a hypocrite because of this.

Again about your transgression against other...only if they forgive you, then Allah forgives you too (if repented sincerely of course)

That is also why one should be very carefull with sins where other people are involved...because these kind of sins will not be forgiven just by going on Hadj or whatever.
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Studentofdeed
10-04-2018, 11:53 AM
What if I can not find some people? There some people I think may have wronged but I literally can not find them. Am I doomed? I played sadqa and made dua for them but I am still worried. What else should I do?
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Ümit
10-04-2018, 12:13 PM
Originally Posted by Studentofdeed
What if I can not find some people? There some people I think may have wronged but I literally can not find them. Am I doomed? I played sadqa and made dua for them but I am still worried. What else should I do?
I must say, you have a problem there. It completely depend on how merciful they are towards you...if they decide not to forgive you, then you will not be forgiven...as simple as that.

to nuance this a little...the punishment can vary depending on the sin...that person may be satisfied by receiving some of your good deeds in return...or he will burden you with some of his sins...

Of course your intention is also very important...how hard did you try to find this person in order to ask forgiveness? giving sadaqa will indeed enlighten it...making dua will enlighten it...repenting will enlighten it...but still you are not off the hook.

The best thing you can do is repent, make sure you don't do it again...and have enough good deeds and hasanaat to use as bargain...and duaa of course...so you are on the right track I suppose.
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Studentofdeed
10-04-2018, 12:51 PM
okay I see. Alright thank you again.
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HisServant
10-05-2018, 10:45 PM
:sl:

In connection to this topic. Does forgiving someone also include an obligation to keep relations with that individual? Especially, if someone were to be taking forgiveness lightly, what would be the proper way of dealing with such a person? (being an extended family member)
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Studentofdeed
10-06-2018, 02:18 AM
I believe you have to keep relations with family however if you tried and tried again and feel they are taking advantage, you may possibly be allowed to keep your distance because you may be promoting harm of sin. Or in case you are worried you will keep getting harmed

- - - Updated - - -

Allah knows best
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