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View Full Version : My mother banned me from jumuah prayer for 6 weeks as "grounding"



SintoDinto
02-23-2019, 09:41 PM
because i harassed a man from masjid over phone, and said mean things to another who i was trying to find out from if the other would sever ties after he had blocked me, over facebook and constantly apologized, then protested my initial ban and relocation to another masjid, while my phone was banned, i started yelling while she watched her turkish soaps. i started protesting and shouting progressively and eventually started shaking her arms and she eevnetually went from one week ban to 6 week ban on all juma prayer, all taxis, (she drives me, despite her work, ), all phone, etc. i tol her juma was farz she didn't even let me go to the nearest masjid saying you can walk. im so weak i can't even walk 1/4 the distance and back without getting all sweaty and shaky.

- - - Updated - - -

update: things have calmed down, now she says she can take me to the nearest masjid
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Nájlá
02-24-2019, 01:52 AM
Shaking her arms? What next? You gonna beat her up just because you are angry? Learn to control your anger and never take it out on the women who carried you for 9 months and STILL looking after you until now, you are still very much depending on your mum. You don't work, you do nothing for her. So respect her. You should be grateful that she forgave you and still willing to take you to the masjid.
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SintoDinto
02-24-2019, 05:13 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Nájlá
Shaking her arms? What next? You gonna beat her up just because you are angry? Learn to control your anger and never take it out on the women who carried you for 9 months and STILL looking after you until now, you are still very much depending on your mum. You don't work, you do nothing for her. So respect her. You should be grateful that she forgave you and still willing to take you to the masjid.
youre absolutely right. i made istighfar and taubah. EDIT: and sincerely apologized to my mother. we're on good terms now, but punishment still stands and she;s decided she's enforcing discipline from now on with punishments for crimes because when i was growing up there weren't many boundaries. a good thing, but is it too late? i made a lot of growth on my own and artificially through therapists.
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alfaqir
02-25-2019, 06:18 AM
joining Nâjlâ, you should really do everything to please your mother and never raise your hands on her. Based on what you have written previously about yourself and your family on this forum, she really seems to do everything for you, you should rather try to help her as much as you can. It is a most beautiful form of ibadet to help your mother, being kind to her and making her happy. Try to control your anger, not only with her (but that is the most important above all!) but with everybody, i.e. was there any point/benefit in arguing with people from masjids in the first place?

say 100 times every day لا اله الا الله وحده لا شريك له، له الملك وله الحمد، وهو على كل شيء قدير La ilaha illallahu wahdahu la sharika lahu, lahul- mulku, wa lahul-hamdu, wa Huwa 'ala kulli shai'in Qadir

there is a hadith about it according to it if you say this 100 times, it protects you from the shaytan that day.

+ it also takes some minutes until you complete this zikr, so that gives you time to "cool down" when you feel that bursts of anger is approaching you. it personally helped me a lot in stressful, depressed situations, inshallah will help you too.
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