Permissible to be friends with a female classmate on social media?

[SintoDinto]

she's Muslim. is it permissible to have her follow me or i follow her on social media?

[BeTheChange]

Asalamualykum

In my personal experience if we all follow the rules of Islam we live with inner peace and bliss. I would strongly urge you not to speak to the opposite sex both in the online world and the offline world unless there is a legitimate need. Utilise your youth and your time doing productive things for the akhira. The devil makes you think you can do this in old age but who is guaranteed old age? Who is guaranteed health in old age? Study and learn the Quraan. Life changing!!

[muslimah__]

Salaam
Only if you have a admin or teacher that monitors the social media and you have no choice but to join it. If your just following each other for the sake of it, then no, don’t do it.

[SintoDinto]

Asalamualykum

In my personal experience if we all follow the rules of Islam we live with inner peace and bliss. I would strongly urge you not to speak to the opposite sex both in the online world and the offline world unless there is a legitimate need. Utilise your youth and your time doing productive things for the akhira. The devil makes you think you can do this in old age but who is guaranteed old age? Who is guaranteed health in old age? Study and learn the Quraan. Life changing!!

but what should i tell her? I think i remember telling her i thought it was haram but she said it wasn't in a kind, calm manner, and i just..i just couldn't. this was in person before the quarantine. i couldn't even bring myself to say i wasn't her friend anymore, i just said, "i was thinking of not being your friend...." i also constantly flip flopped between adding her and unadding her and i dont wanna look like a fool. i even told her (and this is true) it was because of my fearful avoidant attachment (desiring closeness, but running away once i get it)

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[Al-Ansariyah]

Assalamualaikum
Just say "This act is displeasing to my Lord." I am sure she will understand, she herself is a muslim. Say in a polite way or just text her. But i believe saying face to face would be better, coz in texting she won't know whether you are being polite or rude. Even if you lose her, no worries, you have Allah and it would be as if you haven't lost anything.

[Iceee]

Salaam SintoDinto

SO many Muslims are asking this question, ever so frequently. YOU know it's not permissible; that is why you asked. Here's something to think about:

1. Why do you have social media in the first place? We can be using the time spent for better things, Inshallah. Reading the Quran, exercising outside, spending time with family, praying 5 times a day. Remember that social media increases your mental health disorders/problems, which you are getting yourself into.

i also constantly flip flopped between adding her and unadding her and i dont wanna look like a fool.

2. NO MEN AND WOMAN CANNOT BE JUST FRIENDS IN ISLAM. Accept that. She is a non-mahram, not related to you and Satan will TRICK you into falling for these desires with this woman. STOP ALL CONTACT WITH HER NOW! Social media, real life, and pray that Allah forgives you.

3. DO YOU WANT TO MARRY THIS WOMAN? If no, STOP being her friend. Focus on better things; taking care of your body with good diet, balance and exercise and follow Islamic teachings..

IF YOU WANT TO MARRY THIS WOMAN, I urge you to contact this woman's parents/guardian/wali and talk to them FIRST. Tell them your intention, desire, and your feelings. DO IT HALAL, NOT HARAM. Do not let Satan get to you.

[SintoDinto]

My father had already said not to get involved with women online, probably partially because in the past I kept bothering girls online and getting obsessed, and he said this when I mentioned this to him, so I simply told her my father wasn't letting me, and I unadded her. I'm trying to avoid going on instagram for the time being to avoid temptation.

[SintoDinto]

I am also currently unable to get married due to my lack of a job, and my being in university.

[Iceee]

I'm trying to avoid going on instagram for the time being to avoid temptation.

Islam forbids a man to be alone with a non-mahram woman (one who is not his wife or a close relative) even if he is teaching her the Qur’aan, which is the Book of Allaah, That is because the Shaytaan (Satan) would come between them. The Prophet of Islam (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man is alone with a woman but the Shaytaan will be the third one present.”

Islam does not allow the opportunity for things to get out hand; it keeps people away from the steps that might lead to that in the first place. So brother, why do you have Instagram and other social media platforms in the first place? Uninstall/remove them right now. It's causing you mental health problems but you continue to use it.

What is the age you can get married in your country? It doesn't matter if you don't have a job or are in University, is that stopping you from using Instagram and contacting woman?

It was narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Mas‘ood said: We were with the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) when we were young and had nothing with which to get married. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to us: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (4779) and Muslim (1400).

[SintoDinto]

Islam forbids a man to be alone with a non-mahram woman (one who is not his wife or a close relative) even if he is teaching her the Qur’aan, which is the Book of Allaah, That is because the Shaytaan (Satan) would come between them. The Prophet of Islam (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man is alone with a woman but the Shaytaan will be the third one present.”

Islam does not allow the opportunity for things to get out hand; it keeps people away from the steps that might lead to that in the first place. So brother, why do you have Instagram and other social media platforms in the first place? Uninstall/remove them right now. It's causing you mental health problems but you continue to use it.

What is the age you can get married in your country? It doesn't matter if you don't have a job or are in University, is that stopping you from using Instagram and contacting woman?

It was narrated that ‘Abdullah ibn Mas‘ood said: We were with the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) when we were young and had nothing with which to get married. The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to us: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (4779) and Muslim (1400).

I can't fast I take antidepressants and other psychiatric pills, including an antipsychotic.

[SintoDinto]

and if i take the pills early in the morning at suhoor and late at night at iftar i get dehydrated easier than others and i get other health problems like problems with my organs.

[SintoDinto]

@Iceee but I will look for distractions, as imams and scholars have advised.

[Iceee]

and if i take the pills early in the morning at suhoor and late at night at iftar i get dehydrated easier than others and i get other health problems like problems with my organs.

Completely okay. I was just saying that fasting is what many Imams would advise. Again, stop all social media contact with this woman and if you wish to marry, let your intentions be known to her parents. Inshallah.