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zakhamaIman
09-24-2020, 03:00 PM
Hello , I thought about writing here a story of an issue that I'm having hoping I can find some help, answers or guiding.
I'm a female 24 years old. When I was 6 or 7 years old, I used to live in so many fighting and violence between my family members. My mum and my sisters my father , like so many fighting that I had to hide run away, freaked out and afraid.
My father was the only person who cared bout me. He did everything so I can finish school and university. My mum went to Neurodegenerative hospital (couldn't find the right word for that) because she was imagining stuff never happened. She caused us so many problems even with people outside.
I grew up in all these things, now alhamdullellh I finished university I found small job. Last month we figured out that my father got cancer and doctors said it too late. He won't last more than 2 to 3 month's.
My mum came back to the state that she was in few years ago, this time my father ain't here to defend me , she started threating us. She even preparing for my father's death.
Here I'm completely lost, I have faith I pray I believe in Allah, but I don't understand why all these happened to me , I just make dua that everything one day will be just fixed. My father was the only light in my life, he showed us the right path and he filled out hearts with good things.
He is now gonna go.. I really don't know how should I do .. I m terrified.
Thank you all for reading this and thanks in advance for your replies.
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Imraan
09-27-2020, 04:17 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by zakhamaIman
Hello , I thought about writing here a story of an issue that I'm having hoping I can find some help, answers or guiding.
I'm a female 24 years old. When I was 6 or 7 years old, I used to live in so many fighting and violence between my family members. My mum and my sisters my father , like so many fighting that I had to hide run away, freaked out and afraid.
My father was the only person who cared bout me. He did everything so I can finish school and university. My mum went to Neurodegenerative hospital (couldn't find the right word for that) because she was imagining stuff never happened. She caused us so many problems even with people outside.
I grew up in all these things, now alhamdullellh I finished university I found small job. Last month we figured out that my father got cancer and doctors said it too late. He won't last more than 2 to 3 month's.
My mum came back to the state that she was in few years ago, this time my father ain't here to defend me , she started threating us. She even preparing for my father's death.
Here I'm completely lost, I have faith I pray I believe in Allah, but I don't understand why all these happened to me , I just make dua that everything one day will be just fixed. My father was the only light in my life, he showed us the right path and he filled out hearts with good things.
He is now gonna go.. I really don't know how should I do .. I m terrified.
Thank you all for reading this and thanks in advance for your replies.
Do not despair or panic @zakhamaIman whatever you do.
You are at a very vulnerable point right now, full of emotions.
You are only 24, your whole life is ahead of you.
take each day as it comes
stay on the straight and narrow
keep up with prayers, worship, ibadah, read quran, i hope you have the facility to do so within your own confines undisturbed....

you are in a difficult place, no doubt about it. who is the male responsible for you apart from your father.. do you have uncles, any cousin brothers? has your mother fully recovered?
who are you living with right now? in the absence of the your father it will be up to you and your sisters to maintain the home you live in, pray all of you's are guided and not diverted....

why stuff happens to people?, no one will ever know the answer, only Allah swt knows.

in a worldly sense....
"bad things happen to good people"
"karma can catch up with bad people (although not guaranteed)
"good things can happen to bad people, i.e. its possible that they can turn over a new leaf, genuinely... by some miracle re-habilitated although these stories are rare..."

the rightly guided ones have a better understanding and contentment to why events take place despite desired or undesired.... they are said to have "tawakkul"... im pretty confident that your journey will eventually help you gain it...

like i said, do not despair, do not panic, easier said than done i know, but take care of your wellbeing in all aspects... your day to day activities must go on i.e. working, living with siblings, maintaining a home, looking forward to raising a family insh Allah...

i'll include some videos for you to watch that have helped me to some extent.... if you need to cry, let it out, if you need to cry sitting on a prayer mat, do it, if you need to cry after reading quran and supplicating your dua's, do it....




powerful speech by sister Yasmin. (with certain speakers there can be some controversy between views, I say to those criticising, i'm only taking the good bits out... the bits that help humanity in line with the beliefs of our religion of Islam, the qu'ran and of the Sunnah of the prophet SAW...)

it is the reality sister, harsh as it may seem, it is the truth, can't deny it, cant pretend you're in a dream wanting to wake up, live to fight yet another day is what i say and count all your blessings because you know what, if you look long enough, there are people in situations far worse than what you are experiencing right now. if you read about whats been happening to me for the past 3 years, maybe you might realise some of your blessings....

Everyone suffering is always in my duas, please remember me and my family in your prayers too...
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