I want something so bad it pains my heart

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SamehSalim

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Asalamu Alaykum,

My question is how to deal with wanting something so badly that it pains your heart thinking of the possibility that you will never obtain it.
For the past 3 years I have been trying to achieve a spot in medical school. I have dreamt of becoming a doctor my whole entire life that it has quite literally become my personality, my desire, my focus.
When i first got rejected i physically felt my heart shatter into minuscule pieces...my days darkened, my heart hardened, my appetite vanished and I had no purpose in living.
I prayed and prayed.
I cried my eyes to Allah.
I begged and begged.
I went to masjid and gave charity.
I helped the poor and the sick.
I have never asked for anything, never wanted anything more in my entire life than this.
When I got rejected the second time, I couldn't believe it.
I cried so much, i was so hurt.
i am walking in to my third and last year of trying.
I don't think i can mentally deal with another rejection, i am already crying writing this because i want this so badly...so badly.
I have straight As and hours of work experience...i don't know why this is happening ?
I don't know how to stop wanting this...
 
Walkum Salaam sister...what is the reason you want to go to medical school? If your reasons are pure. Allah will help you. But sometimes we fool ourselves and Allah knows it may not be good for your hereafter and deen.

But if you still believe it is good for you...keep making dua and keep trying. Look where you messing up on exams and learn from your mistakes. Study seriously and take advice from those who passed.

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I have failed many times in life but these failures are important because they humbled me and made me an even more harder worker

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These failures are meant to be good for you but we just so not know the reasons
 
Bismi Allahi wa salatu wa salam alaa nabiiyuna Muhammed wa alaa alihi wa ashabihi ajmaeen.

Allah, the Almighty says,which means,
“And it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know.” (AI-Baqarah, 2:216)

The prophets (may Allah shower them with mercy) were tested many times with things much harder than we experience. So why did Allah The Merciful test them since they made almost no sins and were pious. It is His Wisdom.
 
SamehSalim said:
Asalamu Alaykum,

My question is how to deal with wanting something so badly that it pains your heart thinking of the possibility that you will never obtain it.
For the past 3 years I have been trying to achieve a spot in medical school. I have dreamt of becoming a doctor my whole entire life that it has quite literally become my personality, my desire, my focus.
When i first got rejected i physically felt my heart shatter into minuscule pieces...my days darkened, my heart hardened, my appetite vanished and I had no purpose in living.
I prayed and prayed.
I cried my eyes to Allah.
I begged and begged.
I went to masjid and gave charity.
I helped the poor and the sick.
I have never asked for anything, never wanted anything more in my entire life than this.
When I got rejected the second time, I couldn't believe it.
I cried so much, i was so hurt.
i am walking in to my third and last year of trying.
I don't think i can mentally deal with another rejection, i am already crying writing this because i want this so badly...so badly.
I have straight As and hours of work experience...i don't know why this is happening ?
I don't know how to stop wanting this...
Click to expand...

Hi I believe that you are being rejected because you are very soft natured and to be a doctor you have to be emotionally tough as nails. If you are bawling your eyes out now, what would you be like if your patients die horribly in front of your eyes because you have made a mistake?
Besides, wouldn't being a wife and mother be more rewarding AND be more in keeping with Islamic teachings? Females intruding into on a man's world by trying to be pilots, firefighters, medics, politicians, soldiers etc ISN'T the way of Islam. Eastern females wishing to do this symbolize a diseased and degenerate symptom of the influence of Western feminism and decadent atheist Western liberalism in general. A female's proper role is at HOME, taking care of the important household duties and looking after offspring. Ignoring these duties is nothing short of gross irresponsible negligence.
 
That's quite a subjective view you have and contradicts the great female doctors, fighters and scientist we had in the prophets time and in our current times.
The only reason men can even become these roles is because a WOMAN Fatima bint Muhammed Al-Fihriya Al-QFatima bint Muhammad Al-Fihriya Al-Qurashiya (فاطمة بنت محمد الفهرية القرشية‎) founded the world's first university in 895 CE.
 
Not to mention, women are not obligated to be or become any of the things you have listed. If I want a career where I have the opportunity to cure the sick and help help the poor then i have every right too. You can Kindly leave your misogynistic views separate
from Islam. And if you need a history lesson on the extraodinary women of Islam during the golden Ages I will gladly educate you.
 
Thank you for the extra push though, I have more motivation to become a doctor now!:D
 
Well what life you pursue is your business. I personally wouldn't tolerate an uppity feminist wife like that and thankfully my wife agrees with me and likes her role as a housewife. Feminism is a Zionist weapon to destroy families and is BANNED in my house.
 
Good for you, I hope your wife is freed soon from the chackles of your insecurities.
Worried that your wife will earn more than the 'man of the house'? Grow some maturity.
At least Prophet Mohammed SAW encouraged education as it 'a religous duty binding upon every muslim man and WOMAN'.
Being passionate about a career choice isnt embarking feminism.
I know my biological limitations of a woman compared to a man.
I know my role as a female muslim in Islam.
Woman are not just here to breed and serve.
The automatic assumption of you thinking my only role is to become a mother shows how uneducated you are.
I am infertile. Something that you didn't even consider. And guess what? Many other muslim women are too.
The role of a mother doesn't have to be biological or blood related.
Caring for someone can be the equivalent and i hope to achieve that in my future role of a DOCTOR.
A female educated passionate doctor <3
 
SamehSalim said:
A female educated passionate doctor
Click to expand...

From a young age my daughter was passionate about becoming a midwife. She is now a senior midwife and lectures part time at the university.

Islamically, I would think it makes sense for a woman doctor to treat women patients.


May Allah bless you on your journey.
 
السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته

In my opinion, this may be a test from Allah for you. Please don't give up or feel discouraged, please try to work through your struggles.
I would assume that your intentions to be a doctor are pure, so please continue to make dua and work hard, Inshallah you will be rewarded for prevailing through your struggles and for the people you will help, assuming you are able to become a doctor.
And if it never comes to be, consider that it was never meant for you in the first place -what Allah has planned for you will be more fulfilling to you than being a doctor, I'm sure.

But either way, for now, keep working hard and don't give up! Inshallah your hard work will pay off!
 
Thank you, this really touched my heart <3

I will continue working hard and i will update you soon on my journey !

In Shaa Allah things also work out for you no matter what you struggle with :)
 
Karl said:
Hi I believe that you are being rejected because you are very soft natured and to be a doctor you have to be emotionally tough as nails. If you are bawling your eyes out now, what would you be like if your patients die horribly in front of your eyes because you have made a mistake?
Besides, wouldn't being a wife and mother be more rewarding AND be more in keeping with Islamic teachings? Females intruding into on a man's world by trying to be pilots, firefighters, medics, politicians, soldiers etc ISN'T the way of Islam. Eastern females wishing to do this symbolize a diseased and degenerate symptom of the influence of Western feminism and decadent atheist Western liberalism in general. A female's proper role is at HOME, taking care of the important household duties and looking after offspring. Ignoring these duties is nothing short of gross irresponsible negligence.
Click to expand...

Your post made me smile.

BarakAllahu fik!
 
Karl said:
Hi I believe that you are being rejected because you are very soft natured and to be a doctor you have to be emotionally tough as nails. If you are bawling your eyes out now, what would you be like if your patients die horribly in front of your eyes because you have made a mistake?
Besides, wouldn't being a wife and mother be more rewarding AND be more in keeping with Islamic teachings? Females intruding into on a man's world by trying to be pilots, firefighters, medics, politicians, soldiers etc ISN'T the way of Islam. Eastern females wishing to do this symbolize a diseased and degenerate symptom of the influence of Western feminism and decadent atheist Western liberalism in general. A female's proper role is at HOME, taking care of the important household duties and looking after offspring. Ignoring these duties is nothing short of gross irresponsible negligence.
Click to expand...


Aoa. I can't believe what I have just read.to have that kind of un Islamic thinking is beyond abhorrent. Feminism isn't the birth child of western ideology, it is the birth child of mysoginstic ideology men like u carry about women. Women were appointed market checkers during the reign of Umar, they fought in wars, they even led men in prayers, and what not. It is the Christian ideology, and hindu myth that states and emphasises that woman should restrain herself like you think .

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SamehSalim said:
Thank you, this really touched my heart <3

I will continue working hard and i will update you soon on my journey !

In Shaa Allah things also work out for you no matter what you struggle with :)
Click to expand...


Aoa. I am a bit late to this post. Someone once said you never get the thing u yearn for the most. I didn't believe them at that point.but now I'm convinced. It would be appropriate for you to start looking at other career options.. sorry for being a pessimist. It it is the reality
 
iammuslim98 said:
Aoa. I am a bit late to this post. Someone once said you never get the thing u yearn for the most. I didn't believe them at that point.but now I'm convinced. It would be appropriate for you to start looking at other career options.. sorry for being a pessimist. It it is the reality
Click to expand...

no such thing.
Being 'realistic' is an alternative less patronising way to say to someone to just give up.
Unfortunately I don't do that.
If i can't be a doctor in the UK then ill move elsewhere. No problem.
The mentality you have might have helped you get over your failures in life, or get over the things you have failed to obtain however the process is essential for success.
Being 'Realistic' is living life in easy mode.
If you live life in easy mode, your life will be hard. Simple.
I wasn't in best place when i wrote my post, and now I've realised my worth and potential.
Please get rid of the mentality and always strive for what you want the most even if it takes you your whole life, being persistent is key to success.
Have faith in yourself and think positively...
Allah is with you.
 
SamehSalim said:
no such thing.
Being 'realistic' is an alternative less patronising way to say to someone to just give up.
Unfortunately I don't do that.
If i can't be a doctor in the UK then ill move elsewhere. No problem.
The mentality you have might have helped you get over your failures in life, or get over the things you have failed to obtain however the process is essential for success.
Being 'Realistic' is living life in easy mode.
If you live life in easy mode, your life will be hard. Simple.
I wasn't in best place when i wrote my post, and now I've realised my worth and potential.
Please get rid of the mentality and always strive for what you want the most even if it takes you your whole life, being persistent is key to success.
Have faith in yourself and think positively...
Allah is with you.
Click to expand...


Lol, you didn't need to be so rude. Reality is accepting that sometimes things don't go the way you plan them to . Not everyone has the same privilege as u. Not everyone can become a doctor.
 
Asalmu Alaykum Brothers and Sisters!

Just wanted to pop back here to share that I GOT INTO MEDICAL SCHOOL Alhamdulliah !!!
 

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