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confusedandsad
10-20-2022, 09:41 PM
Assalamualaikum,

I have found a brother that I would like to marry and have known him for about 10 months before consulting my parents that I’d like to marry him. I genuinely am confident in my decision and have made dua and prayed istikharah for it. There are a few problems at hand though and I’d like to hear any opinions:

1) he cannot fulfil the responsibilities of a marriage as he is not independent yet (we both go to university), however we both plan to stay in our respective homes and study until we can, it is very expensive where we live and we both want to be financially stable
2) his parents are not very religious and do not want him to be religious and also do not allow him to get married until he is 25
3) my parents do know and they are consenting as long as his parents are on board which is very difficult

He is going to consult an Imam and get another opinion. I’m hoping inshAllah that he will tell his parents and they’ll come round. The only other option is not getting married and wait till we graduate which I feel we’d find very difficult too.
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*charisma*
10-21-2022, 01:08 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by confusedandsad
Assalamualaikum,

I have found a brother that I would like to marry and have known him for about 10 months before consulting my parents that I’d like to marry him. I genuinely am confident in my decision and have made dua and prayed istikharah for it. There are a few problems at hand though and I’d like to hear any opinions:

1) he cannot fulfil the responsibilities of a marriage as he is not independent yet (we both go to university), however we both plan to stay in our respective homes and study until we can, it is very expensive where we live and we both want to be financially stable
2) his parents are not very religious and do not want him to be religious and also do not allow him to get married until he is 25
3) my parents do know and they are consenting as long as his parents are on board which is very difficult

He is going to consult an Imam and get another opinion. I’m hoping inshAllah that he will tell his parents and they’ll come round. The only other option is not getting married and wait till we graduate which I feel we’d find very difficult too.
walaikum asalaam

Nothing wrong with getting married now, but his parents do not/should not have any control over his piety and obedience to Allah, so I don't see any reason for him not to do what's right even if they disagree.

However, if you choose to wait, you shouldn't continue contact with him until you are ready.
Also mind your istikhara. If things aren't working out after putting in the right efforts, then it's a sign from Allah telling you he's not right for you.
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Muslimdevotee
11-26-2022, 10:45 AM
So what happened now? Did the nikah happen successfully?
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A.R.BRahimbaksh
11-26-2022, 02:33 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by confusedandsad
Assalamualaikum,

I have found a brother that I would like to marry and have known him for about 10 months before consulting my parents that I’d like to marry him. I genuinely am confident in my decision and have made dua and prayed istikharah for it. There are a few problems at hand though and I’d like to hear any opinions:

1) he cannot fulfil the responsibilities of a marriage as he is not independent yet (we both go to university), however we both plan to stay in our respective homes and study until we can, it is very expensive where we live and we both want to be financially stable
2) his parents are not very religious and do not want him to be religious and also do not allow him to get married until he is 25
3) my parents do know and they are consenting as long as his parents are on board which is very difficult

He is going to consult an Imam and get another opinion. I’m hoping inshAllah that he will tell his parents and they’ll come round. The only other option is not getting married and wait till we graduate which I feel we’d find very difficult too.
Walikum assalam warahmatullah e wa barakhatuhu ,

In my opinion you guys should not go against your parents because they have relation and love with you since you are born . And Ibn Abbas reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “We do not see for those who love one another anything like marriage.”


Source: Sunan Ibn Mājah 1847


Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Albani.
And when he will be 25 years old then he will more responsible . Married person should be responsible .
Till than,Kee holy ( pure ) relationship. It ie the best reward for you that, a non Muslim wants to be a Muslim for you and because of you . It has the best reward in Islam .
Jazakillah
Ibn Abbas reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “We do not see for those who love one another anything like marriage.”
Source: Sunan Ibn Mājah 1847
Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Albani
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