New Muslim Not Attending (Non-Muslim) Family Events

[INFJkitty]

As Salaamu Alaikum brothers and sisters,
I am a convert Muslim and have been for one year Alhamdulillah.
I have been having an emotional battle since yesterday.
A few months ago, one of my closest cousins who is male, passed away in a very sad and unexpected manner. I have a big family and a lot of so my cousins family (the one who passed away) threw a big celebration for my cousin Joshua yesterday. A lot of family out of town came. I told my parents I would not be attending this event due to the fact that Alhamdulillah I just got married and it is important for me to stay and attend to my husband and not engage in this event. My mother was extremely upset, because family is a big deal to us. I felt so guilty and bad for not being there, but Allah swt brings ease to my heart because I didn’t go because 1. There would be free mixing, alcohol, music, etc. My family is all Christian and most of them do not know I converted to Islam. So I know majority would not understand me or my new behavior- for example not wanting to free mix of give hugs to male family members. I feel so misunderstood and judged when I think to myself that I missed the event. But I know as a Muslim woman it would be haram and bad for me to attend an event like this. I guess what I’m saying is converting to Islam changed my life in so many great ways. I just realize that as a Muslim woman I am now allowed to attend events of gathering like this for my family. I feel bad because I always was at family events, I love family and hold family close to my heart- I don’t want anyone to think wrong of me. But this is life and I am unapologetically Muslim and I thank Allah for guiding me to this. I guess I am just venting now- I am feeling this challenge of being a convert with my family. Staying home was the right thing to do- I just feel like I disappointed my family and they don’t understand why… Jazak Allahu Khairun