In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
All praise is due to Allah, the Rabb (Lord) of all mankind, jinn and all that exists. May the peace and blessing of Allah be upon the Prophet, the Seal of all Messengers, Muhammad ( SAW), his family, companions and all those who follow him till the Day Of Judgement. – Ameen.
ANGER!!!
“Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created of fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he should perform ablution.”
Abu Hurairah, radiyallahu 'anhu, reported that a man said to the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam:
"Advise me! "The Prophet said, "Do not become angry and furious." The man asked (the same) again and again, and the Prophet said in each case, "Do not become angry and furious."
[Al-Bukhari; Vol. 8 No. 137]
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background
This hadith is also related by other scholars of hadith. In another narration, it is related as:
A man came to the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, and said, "Messenger of Allah, teach me some words which I can live by. Do not make them too much for me, lest I forget." The Messenger of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, said, "Do not be angry." [Abu Daud]
Some scholars say that the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, knew that the man who asked him used to get angry often and that is why the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, gave him that particular advice. This view may lead to narrowing down and limiting the benefit of the hadith, whereas it is very comprehensive, far-reaching and applicable to all Muslims because everyone is subject to anger.
There are other Qur'anic verses and hadith that emphasize the need to avoid getting angry. Allah mentions the qualities of the muttaqin:
“Those who spend (in Allah’s cause) in prosperity and in adversity, who repress their anger, and who pardon men, verily, Allah loves the al-Muhsinun (the good-doers).”
[Surah Al-Imran (3) : Ayah 133-134]
In another hadith, Abu Hurairah related that the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, said:
"A strong person is not the person who throws his adversaries to the ground. A strong person is the person who contains himself when he is angry." [Al-Bukhari; Book 47, No. 47.3.12]
And from the du'a (supplications) of the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam:
"I ask you O Allah, for truthful speech during times of pleasure and anger" [Nasaai and Ahmad]
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lessons
There are four views, of which two of them are from the earlier scholars and the other two are from the contemporary scholars, about the interpretation of the Prophet's, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, statement "Do not get angry":
A person should learn how to change his character and adapt the characteristics of generosity, kindness, calmness, modesty, patience and forgiving. If a person adapts these qualities, then he may be able to restrain himself when he is about to get angry.
One should not act based on anger or while being angry.
When a person is about to get angry, he should control himself, be patient and not get angry. This is a contemporary view from Sheikh Al-Bitar.
Ustaz Jamaluddin Zarabozo says that the text can be interpreted in the following way: a Muslim must think before acting or speaking. As soon as the feeling of anger appears to oneself, then there is a need to think of why the anger appears and whether it is necessary to be angry. While asking these questions, the person must remember Allah and the Hereafter (Akhirah). This will cause the person to calm down and not get angry.
All these interpretations can be applied as different strategies in handling anger in different situations.
If a person gets angry, then it is necessary that the person performs a muhasabah, which is to account oneself of the mistakes committed, what leads to them and how to overcome them in the future. This is an important training for us to improve ourselves.
In various hadiths, the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, teaches us how to control our anger. For example:
The Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, said, "I know a word, the saying of which will cause him to relax, if he does say it. If he says: 'I seek Refuge with Allah from Satan' then all his anger will go away." [Al-Bukhari; Vol. 4, No. 502]
The Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, said: "I know a phrase which, if he repeated, he could get rid of this angry feeling." They asked: "What is it, Apostle of Allah?" He replied: "He should say: 'I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed devil.'” [Abu Daud; Book 41, No. 4762]
Therefore one of the keys to controlling ourselves during anger is to seek refuge in Allah from Satan because Satan influence us through the ‘was-was’ that influence our perception. Likewise, Satan promotes evil to people by influencing their perception.
Influencing human perception as a satanic way to promote evil and create disputes among believers has been mentioned in many verses in the Qur'an, for example:
"And say to My servants (that) they should (only) speak that which is the best; (Because) Shaitan verily sows dissensions among them. Surely, Shaitan is an open enemy to man." [Surah Al-Isra' (17) : Ayah 53]
Indeed, if somebody uses a vague word in his speech, then Shaitan ‘whispers’ a wrong interpretation or understanding to the listeners of the speech that may affect the relationship amongst them. This is how relationships in the family, brothers, sisters and friends are severed.
In other hadiths, the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, teaches us how to deal with anger:
“Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created of fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he should perform ablution.” [Abu Daud; Book 41, No. 4766]
Abu Dharr narrated: The Apostle of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, said to us: "When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good; otherwise he should lie down." [Abu Daud; Book 41, No. 4764]
In another hadith, the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, said:
“If one of you becomes angry then he should be silent.”
This is an important advice because during anger, most of our actions and speech may not be correct.
Narrated 'Abdur Rahman bin Abi Bakra: Abu Bakr wrote to his son who was in Sijistan: Do not judge between two persons when you are angry, for I heard the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam, saying: "A judge should not judge between two persons while he is in an angry mood." [Al-Bukhari; Vol. 9, No. 272]
This hadith is related to the previous hadith (Hadith 15) - it sets out to avoid the judge from making unjust judgement.
However, there are praiseworthy anger as known from the examples of the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam. He never got angry except when the commandments of Allah are violated. However, if we want to get angry for the sake of Allah, then we need to be careful that we:
are really not getting angry for ourselves or for our own interests.
need to do it in the right way, like not committing wrong actions or saying vulgar words while getting angry.
can achieve the benefit as intended by the shari’ah. If the action leads to more harm than benefit, then it should be avoided based on the principle of weighing between the benefits and harms.
For example, when giving advice, say it in a good way, using good words, and be careful not to get into a quarrel.
It is well known today that anger causes many health problems especially if they are not controlled. There are wisdoms behind shari’ah injunctions and here we find that to control our anger may be beneficial to our health.
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conclusion
Socially, this hadith promotes better relationship among people. We need to restrain anger and be patient. We may dislike something in this life but it may have benefits that we do not know.
Our patience towards others who have been harsh on us may later lead them to think and change themselves to be better. Muslims need to set models for others to learn from.
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Control of anger
“And those who suppress their anger and are forgiving to people and Allah loves the doers of good.”
Allah (SWT) has explained three qualities of His special servants in this verse;
1. They swallow their pride,
2. They forgive the mistakes of Our servants,
3. They not only forgive others who harm them, but also do acts of kindness for them. Allah loves such people.
Together with this Allah (SWT) has provided the prescription for curing the deadly disease of anger in the above verse Allah (SWT) states; “Wal Kadhimeenal Ghayzha”, “Those who suppress their anger.”
This refers to those who suppress their anger. Anger per se, is not evil but the incorrect usage thereof is.
If anger itself were evil, the word ‘annihilate’ would be used and not ‘suppress’. The commentators of the Qur’ãn explain that Allah (SWT) did not use the words ’Those who annihilate their anger.” because the absence of anger is neither meant nor desired. Anger has to remain within one because Allah has created it for a purpose. What is requires, is the correct usage of anger at the correct times, on the appropriate occasions.
Some people request Duã’s that no evil thoughts occur to them, so that desire and demand to fulfil desires become totally non existent. This is immaturity. The actual achievement is to be able to please Allah (SWT) in spite of being assailed by desires. One has to learn to transform the forceful flow of desires flowing through the veins into the life blood of Taqwa.
One who endures difficulties to substantiate his friendship will be deemed a friend to the extent of the difficulties endured. The greater the trials and tribulations endured the greater will be the friendship. Fleeing from the dictates of the Nafs or being overcome by them is proof of our reluctance to tolerate to endure difficulties in the way of Allah. How then, can we lay claim to love? A right, a demand of love is to please the beloved at every cost.
Therefore, notwithstanding the fact that desires demand disobedience, do not be derailed from the duty of love. Persevere in the face of all demands, drill the core of the heart and draw the deeply embedded love that lurks within. If desires were to be annihilated, how will one at the appropriate time, fulfil one’s conjugal rights. In short, the usage has to be controlled, has to be appropriate.
The noble scholars of Islam teach that the objective is not the eradication of evil traits but the channeling and correct usage thereof. Innate, inborn characteristics cannot be wiped out but can be re-directed. If for example one has an excess of anger, before rectification, such anger was used to further one’s selfish needs and desires. On occasions when one is told something unpalatable, all control is lost. Anger immediately came to the fore. Now, after Islãh (reformation), the direction taken by anger changes. Now anger is expressed on occasions when Allah (SWT) is disobeyed, against the demands of the nafs. Anger is still present but has changed direction, it has become praiseworthy, it has become meritorious.
Remember the advice of the Messenger of Allah (SAW). Abu Hurayrah (SAW) reported that a man came to the Prophet (SAW) and said: “Advise me.” He said: “Do not become angry.” The man repeated his request several times, and each time the response was, “Do not become angry.” (Bukhari)
According to another report, the man said, “I thought about what the Prophet (SAW) had said, and I realized that anger is the source of all evil.” (Ahmad).
“Do not get angry, and Paradise will be yours.” (al-Tabaraani).
Remembering what Allah (SWT) has promised to those who avoid the causes of anger and strive to control themselves is the best way to extinguish the flames of anger. The Prophet (SAW) has told us about this great reward:
“Whoever suppresses his anger at the time when he could express it openly, Allah will fill his heart with contentment on the Day of Resurrection.” (al-Tabaraani).
Another immense reward is described in the Hadith: “Whoever suppresses his anger when he is able to vent it, Allah will call him before all the people on the Day of Resurrection and let him choose whoever of the hoor al-‘iyn he wishes.” (Abu Dawood).
Knowing the high rank and distinction that is bestowed upon the one who controls himself. The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said,
“The strong man is not the one who can wrestle another to the ground; the strong man is the one who can control himself when he is angry.” (Ahmad).
The more angry a person gets, the more highly valued is his self-control. The Prophet (SAW) said:
“The real strong man is the one who gets intensely angry, so that his face reddens and his hair stands on end, but he suppresses his anger.” (Ahmad).
The Prophet (SAW) used an incident that took place in front of his Sahabah as an opportunity to reinforce this lesson. Anas (RA) reported that the Prophet (SAW) passed by some people who were wrestling, and asked, “What is this?” They told him, “So-and-so is a strong man. No one challenges him but he beats them at wrestling.” The Prophet (SAW) said,
“Shall I not tell you who is stronger than him? A man who is mistreated by another, but suppresses his anger, has defeated his own shaytan and the shaytan of the one who mistreated him.” (al-Bazzaar).
How to control anger
Seeking refuge with Allah from the Shaitan
Sulaymaan ibn Sard (RA) said: “I was sitting with the Prophet (SAW), and there were two men swearing at one another. One of them was red in the face and the veins of his neck were standing out. The Prophet (SAW) said: ‘I know a word which, if only he would say it, this (anger) would leave him. If he said, “A’oodhu billaahi min al-shaytaan (I seek refuge with Allah from the Shaitan),”, this [anger] would leave him.’” (Bukhari).
He (SAW) also said: “If a man gets angry and says ‘A’oodhu billah (I seek refuge with Allah),’ his anger will cease.”
Keeping quiet
The Messenger (SAW) said: “If any one of you gets angry, let him keep quiet.” (Ahmad)
Anger usually makes a person lose control, often to the extent that he may utter words of kufr (Allah forbid), or curses, or the word of divorce (talaq) which will destroy his family, or foul language that will earn him the enmity of others. Keeping quiet is the way to avoid all of these evils.
Keeping still
The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said: “If any one of you gets angry, let him sit down if he is standing. If his anger goes away, (that is good) otherwise let him lie down.”
The narrator of this hadeeth was Abu Dharr (RA), who told the following story: he was watering his animals at a trough, when some other people came along. He said, “Who among you will help Abu Dharr to water his animals and ....?” A man said, “I will,” but he broke the trough. Abu Dharr was standing, so he sat down, then he lay down. Someone asked him, “O Abu Dharr, why did you sit down then lie down?” He said, “Because the Messenger of Allah (SAW) said … [and quoted the Hadith].” (Ahmad)
According to another report, Abu Dharr (RA) was watering his animals at a trough when another man made him angry, so he sat down… (Fayd al-Qadeer al-Mannaawi).
One of the benefits of this Prophetic teaching is that it prevents the angry person from doing something crazy and out of control. An angry person could inflict harm or even kill – as we shall see shortly – or he could destroy property and so on. Sitting down makes it less likely that he will explode in this fashion, and lying down makes it even less likely that he will do something reckless or harmful. Al-‘Allaamah al-Khattaabi (rh) said in his commentary on Abu Dawood: “The one who is standing is ready to move and destroy things. The one who is sitting is less likely to do so, and the one who is lying is not able to do anything of the sort. It seems that the Prophet (SAW) commanded the angry person to sit down or lie down in order to prevent him from doing anything that he would later regret. And Allaah knows best.” (Abu Dawood)
Following the guidance of the Prophet (SAW) with regard to anger
He(SAW) is our example, and his attitude towards anger is clearly demonstrated in many ahaadeeth, of which one of the most famous was reported by Anas (RA), who said: “I was walking with the Messenger of Allah (SAW), and he was wearing a Najraani cloak with a stiff collar. He was accosted by a Bedouin who pulled his cloak roughly. I looked at the Prophet’s (SAW) neck and saw the marks left by the collar. The Bedouin said: ‘O Muhammad, give me some of the wealth of Allah that you have!’ The Prophet (SAW) turned to him and smiled, and ordered that he should be given something.” (al-Bazzaar).
Another way in which we may follow the example of the Prophet (SAW) is by making our anger for the sake of Allah (SWT), when the limits set by Allah (SWT) are violated. This is the worthy kind of anger. The Prophet (SAW) became angry when he was told about the imaam who was putting people off praying because his recitation was too long. He became angry when he saw a curtain decorated with pictures of animate creatures in ‘Aisha’s (RA) house. He became angry when Usamah (RA) spoke to him about the Makhzoomi woman who was guilty of theft, and said to him, “Are you interceding concerning one of the punishments prescribed by Allah?” He became angry when he was asked questions he disliked. His anger was only for the sake of Allah (SWT).
Know that suppressing anger is one of the signs of taqwa (piety)
Allah (SWT) has praised certain people in His Book, and the Prophet (SAW) highly commended them. There have been prepared for them Gardens as wide as the heavens and the earth. One of their characteristics is that they
“… spend (in Allah’s Cause - deeds of charity, alms, etc.) in prosperity and in adversity, who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily, Allah loves Al-Muhsinun (the good-doers).” (Al-Imran 3:134)
These are the people whose good qualities Allaah has mentioned, people whom others admire and want to catch up with. Another of their characteristics is that
“...when they are angry, they forgive.” (Ash-Shura 42:37)
Paying attention when one is reminded
Anger is something natural, with regard to which people differ. It may be very hard for a person not to get angry, but a sincere person, if he becomes angry and is reminded about Allah (SWT), will remember Him and will stay within the limits that He has prescribed. Some examples of this follow.
Ibn ‘Abbaas (RA) reported that a man asked permission to see ‘Umar (RA), and permission was given. The man said, “O son of al-Khattaab, by Allah, you are not giving us much, and you are not ruling us fairly!” ‘Umar (RA) became so angry that he was about to hit the man, but al-Hirr ibn Qays (who was among the people sitting with ‘Umar) said, “O Ameer al-Mu’mineen, Allah said to His Prophet (SAW):
'Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish (i.e., don’t punish them).’ (Al-A'raf 7:199), and this man is one of the foolish.” By Allah, ‘Umar (RA) did not take the matter any further when this was recited to him. He adhered to the words of Allah (SWT) (Bukhari).
This is how the Muslim should be, not like the evil hypocrite who, when he got angry and was told about the hadeeth of the Prophet (SAW), and was advised by one of the Companions of the Prophet (SAW) to seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan, said, “Do you think there is something wrong with me? Do you think I am crazy? Go away!” (Bukhari, al-Fath, 1/465).
We seek refuge with Allah (SWT) from failure. Ameen!
Knowing the bad effects of anger
The bad effects of anger are many, harming both the self and others. A person may swear and utter obscenities, and may hit others, lashing out with no control. It may even lead to killing. The following story contains a lesson.
‘Alqamah ibn Waa’il reported that his father (may Allah be pleased with him) told him: “I was sitting with the Messenger of Allah (SAW) when a man came along, leading another by a twisted rope. He said, ‘O Messenger of Allah, this man killed my brother.’ The Messenger of Allah (SAW) asked, ‘Did you kill him?’ He said, ‘Yes, I killed him.’ He asked, ‘How did you kill him?’ He said, ‘He and I were hitting trees to make the leaves fall (so we could use them for animal fodder). He swore at me, so I got angry and hit him on the side of the head with an axe, and I killed him.’…” (Muslim)
Even if anger does not go as far as this, there may still be broken bones and injuries. If the person with whom a man is angry runs away, he may turn his anger upon himself, tearing his clothes, slapping his cheeks, falling unconscious, or breaking dishes and furniture.
One of the worst things that result from anger and cause social ills and family breakdown is talaq (divorce). Ask many of those who have divorced their wives how and when it happened, and they will tell you, “It was in a moment of anger.”
Lives are shattered and children are lost as a result. Feelings of regret and failure haunt people’s minds, and life becomes bitter – all because of anger. If only they had remembered Allah (SWT) and come back to their senses, restrained their anger and sought refuge with Allah (SWT) from the Shaitan, what happened would not have happened. Going against shari'ah only ever results in loss.
The physical harm that results from anger is very serious, as the doctors describe, such as thrombosis, high blood pressure, fatal heart attacks, diabetes, etc.
The angry person should think about himself at the time of anger
If the angry person could see himself in the mirror at the time of anger, he would despise himself and how he looks when his color changes, he shakes uncontrollably, his face reddens, the veins of his neck stand out and he behaves like a crazy person. He would be put off by his own appearance, but it is well known that the ugliness that exists inside a person is even worse than any that may appear on the outside. How happy the Shaitan must be when someone is in this state!
Du’a
This is the believer’s constant weapon. He asks his Lord to rid him of evils, problems and bad characteristics, and he seeks refuge with Allah (SWT) from falling into the pit of kufr and wrongdoing caused by anger, because one of the three qualities which will save a person from Hellfire is being just and fair both at times of contentment and at times of anger. One of the du’aa’s of the Prophet (SAW) was:
“Allaahumma bi ‘ilmika’l-ghaybi wa qudratika ‘ala’l-khalqi aheeni ma ‘alimta’l-hayaata khayran li, wa tawaffani idha ‘alimta’l-wafaata khayran li. Allaahumma wa as’aluka khashyataka fi’l-ghaybi wa’l-shahaadah, wa as’aluka kalimat al-ikhlaasi fi’l-ridaa wa’l-ghadab, wa as’aluka’l-qasda fi’l-faqri wa’l-ghinaa, wa as’aluka na’eeman la yanfad, wa qurrata ‘aynin la tanqati’, wa as’aluka’l-ridaa bi’l-qadaa’, wa as’aluka bard al-‘aysh ba’d al-mawt, wa as’aluka ladhdhat al-nadhr ila wajhika wa’l-shawqa ilaa liqaa’ik, fi ghayri darraa’ mudirrah wa laa fitnati mudillah. Allaahumma zayyinnaa bi zeenati’l-eemaan wa’j’alnaa hudaatan muhtadeen"
(O Allah, by Your knowledge of the Unseen and Your power over all creation, keep me alive so long as You know life is good for me, and bring about my death when you know death is good for me. O Allah, I ask You to make me fear You in secret and in the open, I ask You to make me speak sincerely at times of contentment and at times of anger, I ask You to make me be moderate in poverty and in wealth, I ask You for a blessing that does not end, contentment that never ceases, and for acceptance of Your decree. I ask You for a good life after death, and I ask You for the joy of looking upon Your face and the longing to meet You, with no harmful adversity or misleading trial (fitnah). O Allah, adorn us with the beauty of faith, guide us and let us be a means of guidance for others).” (al-Nisaa’i).
Praise be to Allah, Lord of the Worlds
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
i got this of another forum
Islam: Global Message Forum i bumped onto it LoL.