I ain't gone...

Don't worry, I haven't left the forum or anything, we are just having building work done at our house, and I do not have regular access to the web. Insha'Allaah I will be back on LI properly in mid-April, and I will be able to have the company of my brothers and sisters more often. I've strated wearing a green turban, and I have also recently began attending Quran classes. But I still have great Iman difficulties, and all I have gained in this aspect is a better understanding of the problem. The problem is that whilst attending classes and seeing other Muslims helps my iman, my surroundings and my life just burn it away afterwards. I can't make progress because of this 'balance', and I have come to the conclusion that for any young person to succeed in converting to Islam they need to change to a completely new life, otherwise it will just end up in depression and misery, like me. Can somebody here please give me some advice, because this saddness ruins my life, stops me from doing my school work and everything? I just want to start again, in a life where I can be a good Muslim.

Fishman said:

Don't worry, I haven't left the forum or anything, we are just having building work done at our house, and I do not have regular access to the web. Insha'Allaah I will be back on LI properly in mid-April, and I will be able to have the company of my brothers and sisters more often. I've strated wearing a green turban, and I have also recently began attending Quran classes. But I still have great Iman difficulties, and all I have gained in this aspect is a better understanding of the problem. The problem is that whilst attending classes and seeing other Muslims helps my iman, my surroundings and my life just burn it away afterwards. I can't make progress because of this 'balance', and I have come to the conclusion that for any young person to succeed in converting to Islam they need to change to a completely new life, otherwise it will just end up in depression and misery, like me. Can somebody here please give me some advice, because this saddness ruins my life, stops me from doing my school work and everything? I just want to start again, in a life where I can be a good Muslim.

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Bro, you are still you and just because you have embraced a new faith it doesn't necessarily mean you have to abandone everything that has formed your identity for the last x years. My advice to you would be to remain true to yourself. Your outlook on life may have changed somewhat but don't think of knocking down a perfectly built wall so to speak. Maybe you could start an Islam awareness circle and educate non-Muslims around you as to what you believe in. When you feel downtrodden, take solace in small dua, nafl prayer or even quiet contemplation. Take the small steps that will build on your character and identity.

InshaAllah, take care till mid-April. Good luck with exams and that.:thumbs_up

Dear brother fishman...
I have been following your post on the cyber counseling section... and I truly feel a great sense of sadness in you that has lasted more than what is usually considered normal... possible you are suffering from depression? I can be completely wrong and would like to believe that I am... but if this sense of depression you have had has lasted more than six months chances are it isn't really due to weak faith or embracing a new faith... but a chemical imbalance and can happen to anybody and can even be triggered by stress in your life... but it is something that the body should adjust to... it shouldn't last this long!... Why not visit a doctor and just have a chat with him or her --if for nothing else just to take a load off your chest and go into this next stage with more peace in your heart Insha'Allah!-- I'd like to agree with sister strider when she says take small steps... Islam is your way of life... it is your identity... you don't necessarily have to wear a green turban to prove that you are Muslims... nor does sporting it or not sporting it make you any less of a Muslim... you are what you are! And you are blessed with the gift of faith insha'Allah-- which is the greatest gift of all!-- next time I read a post by you.. I'll hope insha'Allah that things are on the up and up so let us know how you fair!
fi Aman illah

i understand, fish. my first days as a muslim was a pure hell. i felt like i was expelled from my life, and i wanted to be someone else but myself.

the 'change' toward a completely new life is no easy, bro. it will be a long and exhausting journey (but why sweat if it is a journey to a light ). we are no angel, so we have to believe that imaan is just a set of marches and retreats.

but i believe that if something is not mean enough to kill me, it will only make me stronger.

all the best. Allah loves you

Fishman said:

I've strated wearing a green turban

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Excuse me for asking this.... "Why?"

:salamext:

Bro Fishman don't be sad...just remember one thing

The struggle to achieve the domination of the True way of
life (Deen al-Haq) -our goal is the most important thing than to let ourselves preoccupied with unproductive feeling of sadness.

Greetings, Fishman.

Salaam

Everytime I feel the way you feel, I first read Quran and i always have the following book handy:
http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Sad-Aaidh-Abdullah-Al-Qarni/dp/9960850447

Here is a review:
http://www.islamiccenters.org/default.asp?ID=42&GoToCat=DISPA

I'd urge you to get it brother. It is full of practical advice on how to replace sadness with a pragmatic and ultimately satisfying Islamic outlook on life. It exposes to the modern reader how Islam teaches us to deal with the tests and tribulations of this world.

i wish u the best bro

salamualikum.
join the crew dude, inshallah your in me dua'ahs please remember me in your pious dua'ahs aswel tis very hard for a person who has converted. indeed VERY hard
Anywho just have faith in your ONE lord allah subwhanatallah && take care of ya self be back aswel when you can inshallah && take it easy
ma'assalama