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Jake Black
11-26-2007, 09:29 PM
Hi everyone,

I need some help please. I becam muslim 2 months ago. My girlfriend of 4.5 years has reacted really badly. Has given me an ultimatum to choose her or Islam. I love her and want to marry her. I can't bear the thought of her going to hell because she is a non believer. Is it right that I should go to hell just so I can be wiv her by stop being muslim. Is there another option that doesn't involve givng her up? I have yet to read all of the quran so how could I possibly give her up if i haven't read the whole of the book. I don't want to give her up and then find something in the qu'ran I fundamentally disagree wiv and stop believing in Islam. Plz help
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chosen
11-26-2007, 11:03 PM
if you have chosen to be a muslim that is your choice..but I am sure you know that there are many things and behaviors you must give up to be muslim..first of all you are not even suppose to have a girlfriend ..so loosing your girlfriend should not be an issue..second you can not force your girlfriend to be muslim..that is it plain and simple..Time to walk away..cut her loose..muslims claim islam is a way of life..i am christian and dont agree with the religion..but if you choose to be muslim then start living as a muslim..
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جوري
11-26-2007, 11:12 PM
Originally Posted by Jake Black
Hi everyone,

I need some help please. I becam muslim 2 months ago. My girlfriend of 4.5 years has reacted really badly. Has given me an ultimatum to choose her or Islam. I love her and want to marry her. I can't bear the thought of her going to hell because she is a non believer. Is it right that I should go to hell just so I can be wiv her by stop being muslim. Is there another option that doesn't involve givng her up? I have yet to read all of the quran so how could I possibly give her up if i haven't read the whole of the book. I don't want to give her up and then find something in the qu'ran I fundamentally disagree wiv and stop believing in Islam. Plz help
being a Muslim isn't something to be entered into lightly.. it is a complete way of life.. I have to be honest, I have never met a revert that hadn't reflected deeply on this religion before becoming Muslim.. I am rather shocked that you didn't read the Quran in full-- for now, no matter..
you need to take some time off a short sojourn away from life as you know it to reflect and meditate, and hopefully you'll arrive to the correct decision once you have had some time to think about what you need to do next


:w:
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Grace Seeker
11-27-2007, 12:49 AM
In short, this girl is saying to you: "It's either me or your God, it can't be both."

Well, I think she has done you a favor. She has drawn the decision very clearly for you. Along with Purest, I'm surprised that you didn't already consider this before reverting to Islam.

Btw, she is not the only one who would tell you this. If you were to make a committment to be a Christian, Jesus would be saying the very same thing to you. In all religions it boils down to that exactly, what is going to be number one, of first priority in your life? If you choose your girlfriend, you might as well say that she is your god, for God (be you choose to address him by the name of Allah or Jesus or Yahweh) will let you put no other gods (or persons) before him.
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جوري
11-28-2007, 01:07 AM
^^ brilliant..wish I could rep you..when I get my repping power I'll come back with vengeance..:haha:

peace G.
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tigersabre
11-28-2007, 02:01 AM
Originally Posted by Jake Black
Hi everyone,

I need some help please. I becam muslim 2 months ago. My girlfriend of 4.5 years has reacted really badly. Has given me an ultimatum to choose her or Islam. I love her and want to marry her. I can't bear the thought of her going to hell because she is a non believer. Is it right that I should go to hell just so I can be wiv her by stop being muslim. Is there another option that doesn't involve givng her up? I have yet to read all of the quran so how could I possibly give her up if i haven't read the whole of the book. I don't want to give her up and then find something in the qu'ran I fundamentally disagree wiv and stop believing in Islam. Plz help
Here is something from the Qur'aan you may find relevant to your own situation - a message from Allah to you (whose meaning is translated, of course):

[29:2-7]
Do people think that they will be left alone because they say, "We believe," and will not be tested? And We indeed tested those who were before them. And Allah will certainly make known those who are true, and will certainly make known those who are liars.

Or those who do evil deeds think that they can escape Us? That which they judge is evil. Whoever hopes for the Meeting with Allah, then Allah's Term is surely coming, and He is the All-Hearer, the All-Knower.

And whosoever strives, he strives only for himself. Verily, Allah is free of all wants from all that exists. Those who believe [in the Oneness of Allah and in the Messenger Muhammad, and do not apostate because of the harm they receive from the polytheists], and do righteous good deeds, surely, We shall remit from them their evil deeds and shall reward them according to the best of that which they used to do.
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syilla
11-28-2007, 02:05 AM
:salamext:

just tell her...

Accept me for who i am or i find someone that who really loves me for who i am... :p
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MustafaMc
11-28-2007, 02:32 AM
The choice you face is between this life and the Hereafter. To chose to marry one who is dead-set against the religion you have chosen will most likely lead you to abandon your faith in short order. Speaking as a revert of nearly 26 years, I have encountered many obstacles in the practice of Islam, but fortunately the Christian I had married was not one of them. Praise Allah, she has since become a Muslim as well.
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al-muslimah
11-28-2007, 03:20 AM
Choose Islam and don't apostasize but please try and giver her dawah and call her to islam don't give up.Islam is more worth it than anything.
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snakelegs
11-28-2007, 03:23 AM
just wanted to point out that it doesn't really take all that long to read the qur'an. to study it and reflect on it takes longer, but to read it through shouldn't take long. i'm sure you'd notice if you found something unacceptable.
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Jayda
11-28-2007, 04:31 PM
hola,

break up with each other... from a woman's perspective what you are describing has no future and it's not worth the headache for you.

que Dios te bendiga
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IbnAbdulHakim
11-28-2007, 04:40 PM
jayda and graceseeker have given great advice.

This girl gives you little value and Allaah is far greater.


Decision seems quite clear!


Assalamu Alaikum
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