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Protected_Diamond
11-12-2005, 11:34 PM
:sl: warhmatulahi wabarakthu

An old Muslim woman lived next dooor to an atheist. Every day she would stand on
her front porch and yelled "Allahu Akbar! Oh Allah! I believe in You!"; and the
atheist would stick his head out the window and say "There is no Allah! Allah
doesn't exist!" The old Muslim woman would turn away and walk inside.
This went on for years.
One day, She went outside and said "Oh Allah! I know that You will provide my
food for the week. I have no money, but I believe in You!"
The next day, she came outside and found four large bags of groceries, she took
them inside and came out again and said, "Thank you Allah! Thank you for the
gift and the provisions! Oh Allah I believe in You!"
The atheist was hiding in the bushes, and jumped out and said "Aha! Allah didn't
put those groceries there! I did! That proves that there is no Allah!"
The old woman looks upward with a smile on her face and says "Oh Allah! Not only
did You provide my food, but you made Shaitan pay for it!"

:w: warhmatulahi wabarakthu
Reply

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Danish
11-12-2005, 11:42 PM
ws wr wb
lol, thats funny
Reply

Lonely_Boy
11-13-2005, 06:50 AM
:sl:

SUBHANALLAH
Great post Sister
keep posting and welcome for being a moderator

:w:
Reply

Bittersteel
11-13-2005, 08:23 AM
Doesn't Allah say He helps only those who helps themselves?
Reply

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ummAbdillah
12-18-2005, 02:11 PM
:giggling:
Reply

Mainul_Islam
12-19-2005, 03:16 AM
:sl:

LOOOOL!!!
Reply

Khayal
01-09-2008, 08:06 AM
Originally Posted by Protected_Diamond
:sl: warhmatulahi wabarakthu

An old Muslim woman lived next dooor to an atheist. Every day she would stand on
her front porch and yelled "Allahu Akbar! Oh Allah! I believe in You!"; and the
atheist would stick his head out the window and say "There is no Allah! Allah
doesn't exist!" The old Muslim woman would turn away and walk inside.
This went on for years.
One day, She went outside and said "Oh Allah! I know that You will provide my
food for the week. I have no money, but I believe in You!"
The next day, she came outside and found four large bags of groceries, she took
them inside and came out again and said, "Thank you Allah! Thank you for the
gift and the provisions! Oh Allah I believe in You!"
The atheist was hiding in the bushes, and jumped out and said "Aha! Allah didn't
put those groceries there! I did! That proves that there is no Allah!"
The old woman looks upward with a smile on her face and says "Oh Allah! Not only
did You provide my food, but you made Shaitan pay for it!"

:w: warhmatulahi wabarakthu

:sl:

:giggling:


:w:
Reply

Souljette
01-09-2008, 01:08 PM
hahahh lol mashallah tht was funnyy
Reply

☆•♥°ąყ℮Տիმ°♥•☆
01-09-2008, 01:13 PM

:sl:
:giggling: awesome
Reply

adeeb
01-09-2008, 01:25 PM
hahaha...funny...
Reply

guyabano
01-09-2008, 01:26 PM
I don't get this 'joke'. Is an Atheist automatically a 'Shaitan' ??? hmmmmp!?
Reply

------
01-09-2008, 01:36 PM
:salamext:

...:lol:.... :coolious:
Reply

Periwinkle18
01-09-2008, 01:37 PM
lol tht was funny.:)
Reply

MartyrX
01-09-2008, 02:31 PM
LOL that was great!
Reply

Mikayeel
01-09-2008, 05:55 PM
Originally Posted by guyabano
I don't get this 'joke'. Is an Atheist automatically a 'Shaitan' ??? hmmmmp!?
well he is a shaitan because of the way he acted!, he wanted to prove her wrong by going and buying this bag full of food and put it on her door so he could prove her wrong!(thats very evil wouldnt you agree?)

hahaha looool that was funny
Reply

x-samia-x
01-09-2008, 10:17 PM
lol! that was funny :)
thank u for posting it.

jazaka'Allah khairun
Reply

syilla
01-10-2008, 12:04 AM
Originally Posted by guyabano
I don't get this 'joke'. Is an Atheist automatically a 'Shaitan' ??? hmmmmp!?
don't worry she is only talking about her neighbour
Reply

wilberhum
01-10-2008, 12:06 AM
Originally Posted by guyabano
I don't get this 'joke'. Is an Atheist automatically a 'Shaitan' ??? hmmmmp!?
That seams to be the general attitude on this forum.
Reply

truemuslim
01-10-2008, 12:08 AM
Originally Posted by wilberhum
That seams to be the general attitude on this forum.
r u her nieghbor?
Reply

ranma1/2
01-10-2008, 12:21 AM
Originally Posted by Protected_Diamond
:sl: warhmatulahi wabarakthu

An old Muslim woman lived next dooor to an atheist. Every day she would stand on
her front porch and yelled "Allahu Akbar! Oh Allah! I believe in You!"; and the
atheist would stick his head out the window and say "There is no Allah! Allah
doesn't exist!" The old Muslim woman would turn away and walk inside.
This went on for years.
One day, She went outside and said "Oh Allah! I know that You will provide my
food for the week. I have no money, but I believe in You!"
The next day, she came outside and found four large bags of groceries, she took
them inside and came out again and said, "Thank you Allah! Thank you for the
gift and the provisions! Oh Allah I believe in You!"
The atheist was hiding in the bushes, and jumped out and said "Aha! Allah didn't
put those groceries there! I did! That proves that there is no Allah!"
The old woman looks upward with a smile on her face and says "Oh Allah! Not only
did You provide my food, but you made Shaitan pay for it!"

:w: warhmatulahi wabarakthu
reminds me of a joke.

there was this christian, jew, muslim and buddhists stuck in the desert.

The christian, Jew and Muslim each decided to pray for their god to save them. The buddhists decided to find away out.

The buddhists eventually found his way to safety weeks later and brought a rescue crew back to them. They were dead. Instead of helping themselves and solving their problems they waited and prayed.

Oh well...
Reply

ikaj
01-10-2008, 12:31 AM
Originally Posted by ranma1/2
reminds me of a joke.

there was this christian, jew, muslim and buddhists stuck in the desert.

The christian, Jew and Muslim each decided to pray for their god to save them. The buddhists decided to find away out.

The buddhists eventually found his way to safety weeks later and brought a rescue crew back to them. They were dead. Instead of helping themselves and solving their problems they waited and prayed.

Oh well...
I don't know if this is a hadith or not but my dad would always say "God helps those who helps themselves". God believing people don't sit on their butts and pray without trying to solve the problems with the energy and mind given to them by God. They pray to God to thank Him and to pray to Him to make it easier for Him to solve the problems.
Reply

ikaj
01-10-2008, 12:32 AM
..edit..to make it easier on them (not Him)
Reply

جوري
01-10-2008, 01:20 AM
Originally Posted by ranma1/2
reminds me of a joke.

there was this christian, jew, muslim and buddhists stuck in the desert.

The christian, Jew and Muslim each decided to pray for their god to save them. The buddhists decided to find away out.

The buddhists eventually found his way to safety weeks later and brought a rescue crew back to them. They were dead. Instead of helping themselves and solving their problems they waited and prayed.

Oh well...
is this from the grim brothers' book of jokes?
Delivery of the punch line just wasn't effective!

cheers
Reply

wilberhum
01-10-2008, 01:21 AM
Originally Posted by truemuslim
r u her nieghbor?
I have a neighbor named Sally. Is that who you are talking about? :giggling:
Reply

truemuslim
01-10-2008, 02:47 AM
Originally Posted by wilberhum
I have a neighbor named Sally. Is that who you are talking about? :giggling:
o my god, ur hilarius.. u a comedian?
Reply

wilberhum
01-10-2008, 03:07 AM
Originally Posted by truemuslim
o my god, ur hilarius.. u a comedian?
I’m just a Don Rickles want-a-be. :D
Reply

truemuslim
01-10-2008, 04:25 AM
^^^ yay another one of ur amazing jokes right/?
Reply

wilberhum
01-10-2008, 04:37 AM
Originally Posted by truemuslim
^^^ yay another one of ur amazing jokes right/?
You seam to lack humor in your life.

I hope this helps.
Reply

truemuslim
01-10-2008, 04:42 AM
^^^ 1. i cant see that... :) yay..

and 2. no... if u are a comedian or 'try' that hard to be funny then u should know sarcasism...but...thanks for trying.. :(
Reply

Mikayeel
01-10-2008, 09:01 AM
this thread should be closed our atheist friends seem to misunderstand the meaning of the joke:(, its not talking about all atheist is it? only about that neighbour which is mis behaving
Reply

wilberhum
01-10-2008, 09:09 AM
Originally Posted by Hamada
this thread should be closed our atheist friends seem to misunderstand the meaning of the joke:(, its not talking about all atheist is it? only about that neighbour which is mis behaving
I don't think it is your atheist friends that seem to misunderstand. :D
Reply

guyabano
01-10-2008, 09:46 AM
Originally Posted by syilla
don't worry she is only talking about her neighbour
I see definetely no funny part in this 'joke', or someone must really be a muslim to understand it.

ah, nevermind.
Reply

crayon
01-10-2008, 09:59 AM
...

I must be missing the humor in the first joke, because I don't find it funny at all..
Reply

Mikayeel
01-10-2008, 04:10 PM
Originally Posted by wilberhum
I don't think it is your atheist friends that seem to misunderstand. :D
.......
Reply

rozeena
01-10-2008, 04:47 PM
lol, thats toooooooooooo funni.cnt stop laufin
Reply

KiWi
06-24-2009, 03:52 AM
An elderly lady was well-known for her Iman and for her confidence in talking about it.
She would stand in front of her house and say Alhamdulilah "Allah be praised" to all those who passed by.
Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain't no Lord!!"
Hard times came upon the elderly lady, and she prayed for Allah to send her some assistance.
She would pray out loud in her night prayer" Oh Allah! I need food!! I am having a hard time, please Lord, PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!"
The atheist happened to hear her as she was praying, and decided to play a prank on her.
The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "Alhamdulilah, Allah be praised!."
The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't."
The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "ALHAMDULILAH WA SHUKRILLAH”.
"He not only sent me groceries, but he made the devil pay for them!"

;D
Reply

Muslim Woman
06-24-2009, 05:31 AM
:sl:

Originally Posted by KiWi
;D

:D
Reply

Beardo
06-24-2009, 06:00 AM
Originally Posted by zÂk
Threads Merged :ermm:

Plz use the search feature before posting a new thread :ermm:
That's alotta work. Search, then post. Takes a bit lore time... But it's for the good :D

But this story was hilarious LOL
Reply

جوري
06-24-2009, 06:13 AM
truth be told, I enjoyed it better the 2nd time around.. :haha:
also I think the devil is a bit more clever than atheists no-- for on the lowest denominator the devil does believe in God!
she got an unwitting idiot to pay for her meals and that is great!
Reply

MSN
06-24-2009, 06:27 AM
Funny story!!LOL
Reply

KiWi
06-24-2009, 07:37 PM
Originally Posted by zÂk
Threads Merged :ermm:

Plz use the search feature before posting a new thread :ermm:
i did, but didnt find it...
that's y i posted it :ermm:
Reply

Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
06-25-2009, 12:07 AM
LOL that's so funny.

:sl:
Reply

☆ღUmm Uthmanღ☆
06-25-2009, 12:51 AM
Subhan'Allah!! dat waz so funny, loool...
Reply

Gubbleknucker
06-26-2009, 07:02 PM
Originally Posted by Mikayeel
well he is a shaitan because of the way he acted!, he wanted to prove her wrong by going and buying this bag full of food and put it on her door so he could prove her wrong!(thats very evil wouldnt you agree?)
No, I wouldn't. He was really nice to provide food to her.

Now if he had stolen food from her that would be evil.
Reply

HopeFul
06-26-2009, 07:04 PM
hahaha funny
Reply

Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
06-26-2009, 07:05 PM
No, I wouldn't. He was really nice to provide food to her.

Now if he had stolen food from her that would be evil.
He didn't provide for her because he wanted to or felt bad for her. He wanted to prove her beliefs wrong and even laughed at her....hardly nice!
Reply

believeByHEART.
06-26-2009, 07:18 PM
ahhh funny, i like it. :)

although why are youse arguing about the whole priniciple of it?
its a little story.
dont be so offended athiests cos the woman addresses the man as a shaitan.

after all its showing the comic side of a old woman teasing a ignorant man who isnt thinking of his actions and who thinks its okay to prove our religion wrong with no evidence behind it?

im sure other more educated athiests than the one in this story will understand if your truly here to learn more of the islam religion, understand what im getting at? :)
Reply

Gubbleknucker
06-26-2009, 10:47 PM
Originally Posted by Light of Heaven
He didn't provide for her because he wanted to or felt bad for her. He wanted to prove her beliefs wrong and even laughed at her....hardly nice!
Yes, but the old lady behaved just as badly.

Overall I don't like either character in the joke.
Reply

AntiKarateKid
06-26-2009, 11:06 PM
Originally Posted by Gubbleknucker
Yes, but the old lady behaved just as badly.

Overall I don't like either character in the joke.
How did she act badly. Your previous comment of "he was being nice by providing food to her" tells me that you may not have understood the story.

The atheist bought food not for the purpose of caring for her, but instead to try to combat her beliefs and make her lose faith in Allah. It was bought with maliciousness in mind, so the atheist is malicious.

In Islam, your actions are judged by your intentions. Not to mention the fact that atheism itself is condemned by the religion (obviously).

Anyways, the joke made me smile. What a witty old sister.
Reply

Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
06-27-2009, 12:01 AM
Where did she behave badly? That she rebuked him for his animosity?
Reply

GuestFellow
06-27-2009, 12:09 AM
LOL!!!

That was hilarious.
Reply

liya
06-27-2009, 12:25 AM
hehehehe really funny !!
thnx 4 posting it ... ^_^
Reply

BoredAgnostic
06-27-2009, 01:09 AM
....Well, I do dislike both characters as well. One, the atheist should of really just minded his own business... if the old woman wanted to proclaim that, then that's her right...and he should of remembered that theists will say their God works through people.. With the woman equating the atheist to satan, I think is pretty insulting, whether or not you believe in the actual entity, since Satan is suppose to be the epitome of all things evil and despicable. So I guess I fail to see the real humor in it, but then again I'm just a simple-minded nonbeliever lol....
Reply

AntiKarateKid
06-27-2009, 03:53 AM
Originally Posted by BoredAgnostic
....Well, I do dislike both characters as well. One, the atheist should of really just minded his own business... if the old woman wanted to proclaim that, then that's her right...and he should of remembered that theists will say their God works through people.. With the woman equating the atheist to satan, I think is pretty insulting, whether or not you believe in the actual entity, since Satan is suppose to be the epitome of all things evil and despicable. So I guess I fail to see the real humor in it, but then again I'm just a simple-minded nonbeliever lol....
Shaitan also means devil, not necessarily Satan. The atheist was trying to undermine her religion which is what shaitan does. The lady calls them as she sees them.

You steal something, I call you a thief.
Reply

afzalaung
06-28-2009, 05:52 PM
LOL>..hilariouis!!!
Reply

Uthman
06-28-2009, 05:55 PM
I find the subsequent discussion/debate more funny than the joke itself. :D
Reply

Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн
06-28-2009, 06:28 PM
^^Lol I'd have to agree with you brother Uthman ;D
Reply

Muezzin
07-01-2009, 05:07 PM
Originally Posted by Uthmān
I find the subsequent discussion/debate more funny than the joke itself. :D
This is possibly the most controversial joke on the forum

And I didn't write it.

Failed, I have.
Reply

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