Advice to Muslims

Advice for Muslims

Peace be with you

I decided to write this being a new Muslim myself and going through the cheese grater of experience growing up in the Muslim community. My conversion to Islam was a move I will never regret however there are many steps I took after that in which I totally regret so in this short discourse I would like to lay down a few pointers to help new Muslims to guard their selves because the devil attacks you from near and far, left and right and he will stop at no means to try and misguide you now you are guided.

1. Never tell a Muslim about what you used to do before Islam especially if you used to enjoy the night life because even though Allah forgives sins the Muslims wont and they will use it at every opportunity to belittle you, Allah is all forgiving and the worst of creation seeks faults in others in order to make themselves feel bigger. There is a hadith in Sahih Bukhari that states that every sin before Islam is forgiven upon embracing Islam

2. If a Muslim asks you your occupation, your age or if you’re married you’re within right to tell them to mind their own business from the hadith of the Holy Prophet where he says from the beauty of somebody’s Islam is the leaving alone of what does not concern him, somebody asked Imam Malik his age and he said ‘does it concern you?’

The consequence of letting Muslims know personal details about yourself is that they will judge you according to their dunya and what they are out to gain, no shoes are the same but they have this western misconception that their shoes are better than yours, no matter the case.

3. Beware of acting pious or showing your deeds before the people, they will seek your faults to discredit you and every human has them.

4. Concerning marriage and wealth don’t expect the Muslims to help you because most likely when you need them most they will leave you in the lurch, strive for your goal with Allah’s help and if possible marry somebody from your own culture because if you happen to marry somebody from the subcontinent, most likely their family will seek to cause trouble and plus there will be too many culture clashes, especially with Islam vs. culture.

5. Solitude is good, it helps with your relationship with Allah but also keep in mind there are still those who walk on earth with Islam in their hearts, wherever you find them, support them without expecting any support back. If you help these servants of Allah, Allah will be quick to help you.

I am a simple human being that is happy to be a Muslim but Muslims nowadays do not reflect Islam keeping in mind the saying of Hasan al basri ‘the Muslims are in their graves and Islam is in books ‘the actions of Muslims is not Islam in these times but actions of ignorant people, enlighten your mind with the life of the Holy Prophet peace be upon him his sayings and most of all Allah’s word the Quran.

When Muslims and Islam contradict remember this advice. Wasalams and all the best, maybe i am wrong on some advice and i am only human.

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Salam Alaikum:

Wow, I'm not really sure what to say. :-\

For sure what you said can be true about some muslims, but your experience differs greatly from mine. I have met very wonderful, supportive brothers and sisters from all over the world, Alhamdulillah. When I reverted there were so many e-mails, letters, gifts, etc., sent to me, that I couldn't begin to list them all. These were from people I never met in person. These same people supported me while I was Christian and continue to do so now that I am a Muslim.

When I lost my job a couple years ago, it wasn't my christian friends that offered help, it was my muslim brothers and sisters that were quick to offer assistance wherever possible, (Financially, emotionally, etc.). Alhamdulillah, it never became necessary for me to accept their offers, but I will remember their kindness and generousity for as long as I live.

These people knew all about my life as a Christian and I'm not ashamed that I went to night clubs. At the time I saw nothing wrong with it. Since being guided to Islam I certainly have a different opinion about that, but that was who I was.

I agree that there are those who will try to humiliate and belittle, I've had that happen numerous times, but there are good and bad everywhere and I don't associate myself with those people. I will leave them to Allah, swt. Certainly my experience has been great as the vast majority are so eager to help and support new reverts, Alhamdulillah.

I posted the following advice to new reverts on our Path to Peace forum and I would like to offer it here as well:

While I was in an Islamic Yahoo Chatroom, I was challenged by a chatter there to name the 4 Madhabs (The 4 schools of thought). I refused to respond as I always have when someone tries to "test" my knowledge.

I suggest you all do the same. These people who try to throw out challenges will only ask questions they obviously know the answer to with the expectations that you do not. They aren't trying to help you or guide you, they are trying to humiliate you. Whether or not you know the answer makes little difference. If you don't know then use it as an opportunity to learn something new, don't feel bad about it. If you do know, then be satisfied that you are learning, mashallah.

Shortly after I reverted I was challenged by a few muslims to recite not only the Shahadah on the mic, but also Al-Fatiha. The Shahadah, I could do but was unsure if I would say it properly. Al-Fatiha I couldn't recite. I remember feeling so bad and thinking I would never learn and felt so much pressure to learn everything in case I was asked again. Then I realized that I was being silly. I don't answer to anyone except Allah, swt, and no one has the right to "test" you. The proclaimation of faith (Shahada) is between you and Allah, swt. No one else. Not even scholars know everything. And I promise you, even as a new revert you could have knowledge that those testing you don't have.

I finally learned how to recite Al-Fatiha this summer, plus other small surahs as well. Not so long ago I was challenged in Yahoo chat to recite it over the mic. This time, I just smiled to myself knowing I had accomplished what I didn't think possible. Alhamdulillah. I would not recite it for that person or anyone else that was trying to "test" me. I have a wonderful teacher, mashallah, and I know when he asks me to recite, it is for wanting to help me, not humiliate me.

Never allow anyone to discourage you from learning and never, ever feel humiliated because you didn't know an answer and never feel you have to "prove" yourself. Your faith is between you and Allah, swt, and only He knows your heart.

May Allah, swt, continue to guide us all. Ameen

Wasalam,
Hana

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

As-salamu alaykum

thank you for sharing, no two shoes are the same, i have also had help of special people, and its also good to support them

as for Brotherhood in Islam it has been broken many times with me but yunno it learnt me not to trust everybody and taught me how to find the right people and to respect the right people.

it taught me to watch out for ulterior motives and all sorts

but anyways , i agree you have your good and your bad, but nowdays good is in very small number ...wasalams

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Salam Alaikum:

Aww, bro, I feel so bad that your experiences haven't been more positive. You're absolutely right, no two shoes are the same.

People, regardless of faith, who critisize others, belittle, taunt, etc., have such a low self esteem that it's necessary for them to put others down so they feel better about themselves. So, next time, take it as a compliment. They see so much good in you they are looking for fault. We all have faults, so no biggie. Maybe they are pointing something out we can work on and improve, inshallah.

Take care and wasalam for now,
Hana

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Subhanallah.

Been around quite a few reverts myself, some have it easy and others hard.

It reminds me of the surah (I can't remember quote for quote) where Allah says do you think we will not test you just because you we believe.

Subhanallah.

Some good tips

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

actually i need to find that verse for improvement for my advice ....wasalams

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

as salam alikum,

i agree with you on a level bro.

when i started to take islam seriously and realised that it was a way of life and that it was MY way of life, i found the same thing happening with me. But i was looking for something solid, something that wasnt fabricated by my culture, and thats when the solitude kicked in. I found myself engrosed in sahih al bukhari and the english translation of the quran. alhamdulilah

It does happen, but we have to remember, the religion has no faults or mistakes, it the people. And inshallah if we can forgive others and others can forgive us , then allah the most merciful of the mercifuls will forgive us when we fall into error.

allah knows best

:sister:

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

as salam alikum,

Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: "we believe," and will not be tested. (Al-'Ankabut 29:2)

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Br. Andaraawus :brother:

actually i need to find that verse for improvement for my advice ....wasalams

Click to expand...

The Believers are tested so that it may be known Who is Sincere and Who is Lying In the beginning of the Tafsir of Surat Al-Baqarah, we discussed the letters which appear at the beginning of some Surahs.


[أَحَسِبَ النَّاسُ أَن يُتْرَكُواْ أَن يَقُولُواْ ءَامَنَّا وَهُمْ لاَ يُفْتَنُونَ ]


(Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: "We believe,'' and will not be tested.) This is a rebuke in the form of a question, meaning that Allah will inevitably test His believing servants according to their level of faith, as it recorded in the authentic Hadith:


«أَشَدُّ النَّاسِ بَلَاءً الْأَنْبِيَاءُ، ثُمَّ الصَّالِحُونَ، ثُمَّ الْأَمْثَلُ فَالْأَمْثَلُ، يُبْتَلَى الرَّجُلُ عَلَى حَسَبِ دِينِهِ، فَإِنْ كَانَ فِي دِينِهِ صَلَابَةٌ زِيدَ لَهُ فِي الْبَلَاء»


(The people most severly tested are the Prophets, then the righteous, then the next best and the next best. A man will be tested in accordance with the degree of his religious commitment; the stonger his religious commitment, the stronger his test.) This Ayah is like the Ayah,


[أَمْ حَسِبْتُمْ أَن تَدْخُلُواْ الْجَنَّةَ وَلَمَّا يَعْلَمِ اللَّهُ الَّذِينَ جَـهَدُواْ مِنكُمْ وَيَعْلَمَ الصَّـبِرِينَ ]


(Do you think that you will enter Paradise without Allah knowing those of you who fought (in His cause) and knowing those who are the patient) (3:142) There is a similar Ayah in Surat At-Tawbah. And Allah says:


[أَمْ حَسِبْتُمْ أَن تَدْخُلُواْ الْجَنَّةَ وَلَمَّا يَأْتِكُم مَّثَلُ الَّذِينَ خَلَوْاْ مِن قَبْلِكُم مَّسَّتْهُمُ الْبَأْسَآءُ وَالضَّرَّآءُ وَزُلْزِلُواْ حَتَّى يَقُولَ الرَّسُولُ وَالَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ مَعَهُ مَتَى نَصْرُ اللَّهِ أَلاَ إِنَّ نَصْرَ اللَّهِ قَرِيبٌ ]

(Or think you that you will enter Paradise without such (trials) as came to those who passed away before you They were afflicted with severe poverty and ailments and were so shaken that even the Messenger and those who believed along with him said, "When (will come) the help of Allah'' Yes! Certainly, the help of Allah is near!) (2:214) Allah says here:


[وَلَقَدْ فَتَنَّا الَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِهِمْ فَلَيَعْلَمَنَّ اللَّهُ الَّذِينَ صَدَقُواْ وَلَيَعْلَمَنَّ الْكَـذِبِينَ ]


(And We indeed tested those who were before them so that Allah will know those who are true, and will know those who are liars.) meaning, He will make know which are sincere in their claim to be believers from those who are lying. Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, knows what has happened in the past and what is yet to come, and He knows how that which will not happen would have happened if it were to happen. All the Imams of Ahlus-Sunnah wal-Jama`ah are agreed on this. This is the view of Ibn `Abbas and others concerning phrases such as the Ayah,


[إِلاَّ لِنَعْلَمَ]

(only that We know) (2:143). Meaning, only to see -- because seeing has to do with what is there, but knowledge is broader than seeing, since it includes what is not present as well as what is.

www.tafsir.com

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Andaraawus said:

Advice for a new Muslim

Peace be with you

I decided to write this being a new Muslim



How long will it be until you will not consider yourself as NEW MUSLIM?

Click to expand...

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

As-salamu alaykum

you are correct, its people , but not them , us really , we all have our faults , just as alot of muslims are an annoyance for me i am probaly an annoyance for somebody else, who knows but Allah, i think great great mistake i made is expecting everybody to be friendly, i found that not the case, i feel solitude is better but also not dividing from the jamaah....
i got told by a good person that not to seek the people but be alone with yourself and protect yourself from the people .....

the mistake i made was thinking the Muslims to be a trouble free people .....let us all be happy and hold hands in unity type thing ....now i am aware of the tricks of shaytaan of how he can use your nearest and dearest to cut you .....backbiting , takfeering and problems like this has drove me away from the people i grew with ......i was within the brelvi community and still am , i am very close to being called a kafir becasue i have moved away from their aqeedah.

The trials of the Children of Israel are hitting us as the Prophet peace be upon him said in the ahadith , the downfall of this Ummah is there in the hadith of the Prophet peace be upon him ....so seeking knowledge of this deen is a high reccomendation for new converst because only then you will see Islam for what it is because the Muslims are without knowledge now and have adopted another way of life ....

im not trying to be self righteous when i say that, seriously i sin and i know very well i do , we ask for guidance daily with ihdina sirat ul mustaqeem 'guide us the straight way' so none of us can really stamp our feet and beat our chest and say we are a 100 percent guided because guidance is an ongoing path which leads to Allah, the more guided you are the closer you will get, and the more in solitude you are, the more time with Allah you have.

If i seek people as i have done i will only end up being hurt and hurt and hurt, i dont want Muslims to go through this expectation of people

just on one more note i have to say that a born Muslim coming back to the deen is a far greater miracle than a kafir becoming a believer because of the fact the born Muslim actually grows up seeing what type of rubbish that our community are in but yet they still see through the smokeclouds whereas i will take a new convert a while to click on whats happening once he has embraced Islam.

In most cases we have pakistanis telling us that Islam is a relgion of peace and unity but wheres the peace and unity when it comes the time when the new Muslim asks for their daughters hand in marriage... ????

But of course its not all the same , infact i am married to a pakistani lady , to say i am the only one in nottingham out of about 15 to 20 of us ....the others are struggling ....and i feel there struggle .....

one was so close but the parents were like 'you are not marrying the gora' ...and they shipped her to pakistan and forced her into marriage so yeh ...i think its time the new converts put the cuddly bears away and got serious ...infact they are www.nottsnewmuslims.com

there are many new converts looking for marriage but they seemed to be getting pushed back! whilst the Sisters that embrace Islam get married of ...not to new converts but to pakistanis ...i even had one pakistani admit that he knows people that are blatantly racist and have married the new convert just to show off with her as his Gori Trophy ....

so ...theres definately something not Islamic happening and i think the bombings even thought they were bad in nature Allah is going to bring alot of good through them because the gorverment are calling for less urdu khutbas and more english speeches and they have banned pakistani scholars and are requesting for english Imams.

So new converts have to get educated and learn the sciences of Islam because we are in a new age and we dont really care about no asabiyyah chant pakistani zindabad, infact alot of us feel that is all the pakistani scholars have bought with them......pakistan....well i didnt embrace pakistan as my relgion and also it would be wrong for me to paint all pakistanis with the same brush .... i have evry few pakistanis i trust ....one of them is my wife ....i love her very much

i have always got on with benglideshis except on one occasion they told me to get out of the mosque upon entering teelling me i wasnt allowed in the mosque because they thought i was a kafir .....darn ...it was funny but not funny ...

ouch fingers hurt ...sorry wasalams thanks for reading
i hope i didnt offend ....i am gainst nationalism and tribalism ....i hate it ...i condemn no race coulour or creed ...just mentalitys ...wasalams

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Brother Andaraawus sorry to hear what you have gone through! Every community has their black sheep and it's most disappointing when it's our Muslim community

All one can do is observer patience (Sabr) and do dawah insha Allah. Also keep away from the fitnah taking place and get close to Allah, Most High.

Re: my advice for a new Muslim



been there bro. hey, on the day of judgment, YOU will defend yourself from the hell fire. So, don't be depressed.

I asked you that question just to illustrate a point that I DON'T CARE if you're a revert, convert, new muslim (this is really an oxymoron because all of us were born muslim). I believe such labels are inappropriate and I personally don't like it. I just care about you because you're muslim.

The issue here is too many labelling. Shaykh this, shaykh that, imam this, imam that, maulana this, maulana that, revert, convert, new muslim. Is there any proven benefit of such labellings?

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatu Allah wa barakatoh..

It seems like some of the new muslims are not being treated as real muslims after all..

I agree that there are those who will try to humiliate and belittle, but remeber that there are muslims who are open and kind.
We will all be more open and friendly 'InshaAllah..
May Allah the most Merciful forgive us and others, and guide us all to the right Path

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

takumi

and the other poster with the logo that says be in this world as if you were a travellor ...i like that logo ....and any other brother sister reading

takumi youre correct all these extravagant labels are not good .... and i like to point one twidly thing out ......some faults need to be picked when Muslims are in a heedless state ....such as tribalism .....the Prophet peace be upon him got angry over this so i should to right?

i think picking faults is really a bad thing if you do it to an individual when its diffrent when youre condemingin a satanic mindset - ....people say that relgious people are brain washed but i dont understand why people have such a relgion as Islam and yet they dont wash their brains of all these shaytanic ideologys such as racism and so forth, .....

takumi and others here set good examples ....when i speak against pakistan i will be speaking against the negativitiy of it and the same goes for every country worldwide and i dont claim to be a 100% correct either so please foirgive me if i put the wrong idea accross .

wasalams

Re: my advice for a new Muslim



I wish we can change the topic of this thread or post ADVICE FOR MUSLIMS.

That will somewhat decrease that islamosuperioritycomplexus syndrome suffered by many.

*syndrome: a GROUP of symptoms (plainly, it's really sick!)

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Warahmatullahi wabarakatuh,

Welcome to LI forum Andaraawus.

You made a remark about how converts need to educate themselves in terms of when asking for marriage from people from different ethnical background. I disagree, because it is not reverts fault that racial attitude is till spewed within certain Asian, Arab and African Muslims household.

Most of the time it is culture that actually clouds Muslim from the deen. I don’t understand why reverts have to battle out and make their lives difficult when it is evidently clear it is not their fault. It should be up to every one of us to destroy prejudice views held by any family member, which will no doubt be very difficult. One of the biggest problems facing the Ummah is due to ignorance and still holding racist ideologist when Islam forbids such thing.

I’m sorry you had to face such hardship but Allah (swt) is merciful and just. Surely we will all be tested.

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Gori Trophy ?

lol bro come on!!

Its only natural for people to be attracted what is "rare" for them.

I mean lemme tell you when I lived in Malta ( a trurist destination) we used to meet tourists often nearly everyday! And I was really shocked at the amount of Swedish / Norwegian / Finnish girls wanting to get to know me mainly because of my tanned skin, brown eyes and long black hair - they were absolutely mesmerized by these features...and what were they? Mostly blonde blue eyed girls!

Same thing happend in my college!

So we shouldnt think in those terms at all actually - humans are just humans - each marries for different reasons. We just have to accept it.

Salam Alaikum

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Br akulion

It understandable what your saying but we are talking about our islamic community here. They should know best. We the best nation after all Insha Allah

Re: my advice for a new Muslim

Well I believe racism will always exist at some level within human beings wether Muslims or non-Muslims. It can be hidden but it will exist.

After all it is part of the test of life!

Satan said to Allah "He is made of clay and I of fire, I am better than him"

Same way Humans find the same things...only in different words...
Examples:

"I am white he is black"
"I am a man, she is a woman"
"I am american he is a Paki"

etc etc.....

Its a sad reality - but its the handiwork of satan - he wants others to be arrogant like he was so that they can become as wretched as he!

So I believe as long as Mr Satan is around we are gona keep seeing this over the centuries in one form or the other unfortunately!