Can women go to funerals?

child-of-islam said:

assalma alykom wa rahmet allah wa barakatoh

Visiting the graveyards for women according to the Four madhabs is makrooh which means dislikable or not prefered to do, but if their visit may lead them to do the weeping or slapping the cheeks or tearing up their clothes or doing any act that is forbidden or if their going out to visit may cause Fitna in anyway then such visit becomes Haram as like any other halal act u do, if it's going to lead to a haram or cause a fitna then it becomes haram
The reason behind forbidding women from visiting graveyards (and forbiding as in Makrooh and not as in Haram) because women are more emotional and more sensetive to any emotional effect than men so theyare more likeable to lose their control than men, and start doing all the weeping or slapping their cheeks or tear their clothes esp. if who they lost is close to them like their parents or husbands or children, its more like a precaution procedure to protect women feelings and never put her in such situations!!

besides maybe if they go out it will cause mixing that will create Fitna cause as i mentioned the idea is to go and remeber the Hereafter and death and not to go and being tempted without having any intetion to do so!!

and remeber how the Prophet (PBUH) described women with this beautiful said when he described them as glass vessels to show how sensetive nad tender they are

Narrated By Anas bin Malik: Once the Prophet was on one of his journeys, and the driver of the camels started chanting (to let the camels go fast). The Prophet said to him. "(Take care) Drive slowly with the glass vessels, O Anjasha! Waihaka (May Allah be Merciful to you).""..........Sahih Bukhari

The idea of follwoing funeral and going to the graves is not crying over someone but to remeber death and the hereafter and i am not saying not to feel sad cause we all are human beings after all but we always try to control our feelings and observe the actions that come out as results of our feelings to come out in the best manner!
Anas Bin malik narrated The Prophet passed by a woman who was sitting and weeping beside a grave and said to her, "Fear Allah and be patient.".........sahih Bukhari
Abduallah bin omar narrated The Prophet said, "He who slaps his cheeks, tears his clothes and follows the ways and traditions of the Days of Ignorance is not one of us."..........Sahih Bukhari
and allah knows!

I hope i could help inshallah

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afroz said:

Assalaam Alaikum,

In dealing with such matters, it best to start with the majority position on a universal, then work down to any particular difference of opinion that may exist.

The 'Asl of the matter is that it is not unlawful for women to visit the graveyard. The difference of opinion is under which Five Rulings it falls on, particularly in relation permissible or makrooh (only a minority hold that it is recommended...)

The Hanafi School holds that it is not unlawful, and is permissible. Some Scholars within the School have differed, where they have mentioned that it is Makrooh tanzihi IF the reason or the act of visiting ends up renewing the grief and sorrow, where the woman spends her time there crying and mourning. This position of the Makrooh is generally the reason that it is held to be Makrroh, in other Schools.

The Hadeeth quoted above:

is one of amongst other proofs that women visited the graves at the time of Prophet :saws:, and he did not forbid them. The Hadeeth is proof, because the Propehts are not permitted to allow any prohibition be acted in their presence. He did not command her to leave the grave, but simply consoled her.

The most correct position in the Shafi'i School is that articulated by Imam Nawawi, after much debate in this school (the School's scholars held differing views and there was no one position in the Shafi'i School). He held that it would be Makrooh if the woman fell in sorrow and grief that she could not let go of, hence cry an wail. This is similar to the Hanafi position. This has become the position of the School. The likes of Ibn Hajar articulated the position by saying that it really comes down to intention and the action. If the intentions are within the Shari'ah then it would be recommended, or permissible at the very least.

The opinion of some teachers later, that it is forbidden for women to visit the grave is unfounded, as it does not reconcile ealrier position of the Prophet (when it was forbidden for both men and women) to the later (that it was permissible). The assertion that the Hadeeth "I forbade you from visitng the grave, but now you can do so" only applied to men, [because it was mentioned to men directly] fails to take many other matters into consideration, like the Hadeeth quote above, that Aisha regularly visited the grave, including her own brother's during her trip for Hajj (which was in the later Madinan time), and the like.

The fact that the caution by scholars was on the conduct of women, that they do not lose their emotion uncontrollably, was the key tp the ruling of Makrooh. There was no doubt that there was no prohibition... it was more a matter of where it fitted in the continuum of the five ruling between (but excluding) prohibition and obligation. There is ample evidence that the Prophet :saws: did not like the uncontrolled mourning and wailing, and which he forbade, but not the visiting of the grave.

Insha Allah that helps.

Was Salaam
Afroz

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