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  1. #1
    sherz_umr's Avatar
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    prophets marriage to aishah..

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    hi..i read online tht aishah (ra) was 6yrs old when she married the prophet,nd it ws consumeratd when she was 9..i was shocked.i explored link after link (all were non-muslim authors unfortunately) nd now i feel disgusted. What is the truth?

    Plz i dont mean to offend anybody..

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    In old days ppl used to marry the girls as early as they became pubertant. In old days it was part of many cultures & was NOT considered wrong,,, & there's was NOTHING wrong about it anyways. When Aisha was be sent to Prophet's house at age 9 all ladies congratulated her for becoming wife of Prophet,,,, if it was a wrong thing at that time ladies would be condemning not congratulating... Aisha's father Abu-Bakr & her mother did not object.... Even enemies of islam did NOT condemn this marriage,, if it was against the culture-of-the-time enemies-of-islam would be falling out of their couches to accuse Prophet.... Nothing of the sorts happened.

    So what Prophet did was within boundaries of his culture & religion.

    Our sense of good & bad is governed by our cut-offs that we set for ourselves. In Japan age of marriage is (or was until recently) as 14 years,,, while west has set it at 18 years,,, So one thing would be OK in Japan while a crime in the West....!!!!!!

    According to Catholic Encyclopedia,,, Maryam (Mary) got pregnant with Eesa(Jesus) when she was quite young., So for GOD that age is OK to become a mother....

    Youngest mother on record was a girl who gave birth at age of 5.

    If someone says that Aisha's age was NOT the problem but the age difference b/w her & the Prophet,,, then remind oneself of incidences like,,, in India few years back a baba(old man) of 90 became father of a child through 45 year old wife (who was his son's wife & baba-jee married her after his son died)...

    I mean,,, there's NOTHING to be amazed at in the marriage of Prophet with Aisha... & yes Sahih Ahadees narrated by Aisha herself says that she was 6 when CONTRACT of marriage was made ,,,, but stayed with her parents until she became pubertant at 9,,, when she was moved to Prophet's house (in urdu called "rukhsatee" رخصتى & they consumated the marriage...
    Last edited by sur; 02-20-2011 at 06:41 PM.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    there are quite a few threads about this topic already. this seems to be a favorite issue among non-Muslims.

    Some things have to be taken into consideration.

    1. All information about Aisha(as) could have been hidden as the only source about her comes from the Ahadith she herself wrote. It was not hidden or suppressed, no sins were committed, it was an honorable and blessed marriage.

    2. Aisha was a very remarkable young lady, very much advanced for her young years. People seldom realize that she was not very much younger than Mariam was when Jesus(as) was born.

    3. Aisha selected Muhammad(PBUH) to be here husband. she was already betrothed to another and took Muhammad(PBUH) instead.

    4. It was not unusual for girls that young to be married and even have children in those times. It was almost a necessity as the life expectancy of people was very short. Very few girls ever lived into their teens. Especially without the protection of a husband.

    If I find some of the other similar threads I will merge this one with them.
    prophets marriage to aishah..




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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    i also need clarification on the subject, i have no clue as to who i should believe or where i should be deriving sources from.

    as is i do not feel comfortable with the answers given for shez_umr, no offence sur.

    man if i could interpret the situation in my mind then i would say go and watch leon.. thats how i think things went down lol

    peace.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Quote Originally Posted by sherz_umr View Post
    hi..i read online tht aishah (ra) was 6yrs old when she married the prophet,nd it ws consumeratd when she was 9..i was shocked.i explored link after link (all were non-muslim authors unfortunately) nd now i feel disgusted. What is the truth?

    Plz i dont mean to offend anybody..


    Prophet Muhammad Aisha Marriage Part 1

    Prophet Muhammad Aisha Marriage Part 2

    Keep in mind, people disagree on how old Aisha (ra) was.
    prophets marriage to aishah..

    I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Not wishing to take this thread off topic, but I was not aware that there is any Biblical evidence with regards to the age of Mary when she conceived Jesus.

    I have done some googling, but all record seem to confirm that it is not known at what age when Mary was betrothed to Joseph or when she conceived Jesus.

    Here it the best I could find with regards to marriage of young girls at that time:

    Jewish maidens were considered marriageable at the age of twelve years and six months, though the actual age of the bride varied with circumstances. The marriage was preceded by the betrothal, after which the bride legally belonged to the bridegroom, though she did not live with him till about a year later, when the marriage used to be celebrated.
    http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/15464b.htm

    We cannot, of course, say for certain, but a likely conjecture is between 14 and 17 years old.
    http://www.ancient-future.net/marynew.html
    prophets marriage to aishah..

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Quote Originally Posted by glo View Post
    Not wishing to take this thread off topic, but I was not aware that there is any Biblical evidence with regards to the age of Mary when she conceived Jesus.

    I have done some googling, but all record seem to confirm that it is not known at what age when Mary was betrothed to Joseph or when she conceived Jesus.

    Here it the best I could find with regards to marriage of young girls at that time:



    I was wondering the same thing, glo. Thanks for the links.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Quote Originally Posted by Guestfellow View Post


    Prophet Muhammad Aisha Marriage Part 1

    Prophet Muhammad Aisha Marriage Part 2

    Keep in mind, people disagree on how old Aisha (ra) was.
    Good point. We really have no idea as to how old she is. All we know is based upon the Hadith, yet we do not know how well she actually knew her age. Most people than had no idea as to what year they were born in. But, let us not use that as an argument. We just need to know that the Marriage was not out of normal, it was a very happy marriage and until recent years nobody ever found fault with it.

    We do know she was physically mature. We may never know her real age and we need to accept that what she said as her age is accurate.
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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Prophet Salallahu Alaihe Wasalam had a number of wives and they varied in age. Amongst his wives were divorcees and widows. Some were many years his senior. So any allegation that he was attracted to young girls is blatantly wrong. He married Khadija Ra when he was 25 and she was a 40 year old divorcee, for one thing.

    Also, what sur and uncle Woodrow mentioned about it being the norm at the time. Life expectancy was shorter and people matured quicker, given the circumstances.

    Prophet Sallalahu Alaihe Wasalam had many enemies, if he did anything wrong in this regard, they would have called him out on it but they never did.

    The fact is, any accusation that is made against the Prophet Sallalahu Alaihe Wasalam in this regard is due to people not thinking about the issue properly and sincerely.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    yes woodrow,i figured that atleast 1 thread of the same topic would be present smewr in the comunity..i tried to use the search facility..nothing happened. I kept coming back to the same page or the net got stuck. So i did the mistake of googling and saw all the crap derogatory links.
    Even posting a comment is darn frustrating when you have to do it using an ancient 'close to death' n73 set with terrible indian mobile internet connection.
    So i ultimately had to type my question here. It wasnt a 'non muslims' attempt to scorn or offend anybody here.
    Thanx evrybody.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    What has been said already is spot-on. But to also enforce the points that has been said, that this was normal in the society at the time, young boys at the age (around) 8-9 would take part in the battlefield and fight men twice their size.. Today this would be unusual. You are looking at things in your own perspective (or should I say a modern perspective) and that is why you'd feel "disgusted" but what you must do instead is look is at the perspective of the time, in this case society/community at the time of this marriage.

    She became a scholar as the result of this marriage and has narrated the 2nd most hadiths of the Prophet(pbuh).

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    ^ I think Aisha (ra) also lead a battle?

    I doubt a women could do that if she had been abused in marriage.
    prophets marriage to aishah..

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Im not sure if Aisha(RA) led a battle or took part in one, but there have been many women who fought in battles Forgotten one particular person, but she killed like 6 Romans on her own.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    It was Um Hakim(RA) who killed 7 Romans.

    (sorry for double post, dunno how to edit)

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    One of the best explanations I saw was a youtube video but unfortunately it's since gone (it's a shame because he was a logical guy.. I believe the user id was something like SwordofAllah). Anyway the main points were:

    1) If the Prophet (pbuh)'s objective was young girls then he would have consummated the marriage sooner. The fact he waited shows this was not the case.
    2) At that time marriages at around this age were common. Society changes it's rules all the time.
    3) Most people (non-Muslims included) agree that puberty is THE indicator of sexual maturity.
    Last edited by Dagless; 02-13-2011 at 09:35 PM.
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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Asalaamu Alaikum,

    Can't say I didn't feel the same at first, but when you research into it, you just laugh at how pathetic you were before. Aisha's(pbuh) marraige to Muhammad(pbuh) is nothing but a blessing, Aisha(pbuh) was an amazing woman. There was absolutly nothing wrong with the marraige.

    Anyways, for the ultimate refute, read this - http://www.islamic-life.com/forums/a...lass_house.pdf
    prophets marriage to aishah..

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Asalaam alaikum warahmatulah Wabarakatuh


    This ayah/verse is used by anti-islamic people to say that sexual intercourse is permitted with children.

    They quote the part of the verse;

    ..and for those who have no courses [(i.e. they are still immature) their 'Iddah (prescribed period) is three months.. [Quran Talaq 65:4]



    Marriage Relations with 'Children'?

    In Islam, a marriage contract can be agreed by parents for their children. So two parents may make a marriage contract that their children will be each others partners when they are mature for the rights of marriage.

    Why is this type of marriage contract usually done?
    In most cases it is done to cement relations between two families, or to agree to marriage early so they have an opportunity for marriage with a certain family before someone else proposes. This was done by Kings in the past to secure relations between two kingdoms.

    Even though this is recognised in Islam, when the children become mature - they have the choice of annulling/cancelling the marriage if they wish to do so. This then refutes the concept of forcing them into marriage if they don't wish to do so.




    Aisha's Marriage



    Bukhari - Volume 5, Book 58, Number 236: Narrated Hisham's father:

    Khadija died three years before the Prophet departed to Medina. He stayed there for two years or so and then he married 'Aisha when she was a girl of six years of age, and he consumed that marriage when she was nine years old.


    This hadith proves the above to be the case, where the marriage contract may take place at an earlier age and the consumation [sexual intercourse] may take place when the person is mature for it.

    Prophet Muhammad's marriage to Aisha was one of the greatest blessings upon this Ummah [muslim nation] because due to her, we learned so much about the personal life of the Messenger. She is the 4th highest narrator of Ahadith [Prophetic sayings]. She had the mind of a scholar and due to this marriage we know the much about the life of the Messenger at home. And this was a divinely inspired Marriage.




    Intimate Relations


    The concept of maturity (balaghah) is different to how people percieve it today.


    People mature at different levels, depending on where they live, and also their biological makeup.

    In countries near the equator, girls mature into women a few years quicker than girls in colder nations. I.e. a girl may have physically developed into a woman by the age of 10 in the middle east, whereas this may occur at 13 for a young woman in Europe.


    HerWord.com says:

    There was a study conducted showing that girls who live in countries close to the equator started their menstruation earlier.

    (HerWord.com,
    http://www.herword.com/healthdesk/ot...s10.28.03.html)



    The book Women and Health Psychology says:

    Many factors have been reported to affect age at menarche and/or the regularity of menstruation—[such as] climate, altitude, race, height, weight, hereditary, stress/psychological factors, light, and nutrition.

    (Women and Health Psychology,
    Women and Health Psychology ... - Google Book Search)



    This phenomenon is not limited to menarche [menstruation periods], but also applies to the whole of puberty. In the book Women: An Historical, Gynecological, and Anthropological Compendium, we read:

    The average temperature of the country or province is considered the chief factor here, not only with regard to menstruation but as regards the whole of sexual development at puberty.


    (Herman H. Ploss, Max Bartels and Paul Bartels; Woman: An Historical,
    Gynecological, and Anthropological Compendium, Volume I, Lord & Bransby,
    1988, p.563;

    Woman. An historical, gynaecological and anthropological compendium. Volume 3 only by PLOSS, Herman Heinrich, BARTELS, Max & BARTELS, Paul Find or Buy Book Now!)





    In Islam, for a girl to have menstruation is not enough, but she should be mature physically, mentally and emotionally for marriage.
    Mufti Maulana Husain Kadodia explained:

    In reality, puberty has two usages. The first usage is with regards to physical development, whereas the second usage is with regards to menses.

    For (sexual) intercourse, developmental puberty (balagha) is a precondition.* Whereas for other rulings—such as being ordered to pray—the menses usage applies.

    (Maulana Mufti Husain Kadodia, Ask Imam.com with Mufti Ebrahim Desai)


    *The puberty being referred to is the puberty of physical growth - so that a person is capable for sexual relations - without any harm coming to them.

    This statement of the scholar - which is based on Islamic teachings - Husain Kadodia proves three points;
    1) A girl who has had her menses but has not matured in her body physically should not have sexual relations, if she was to have a marriage contract. This is because she could be harmed in the process, since her body has not physically matured. [Some girls do have periods early, but their body has not matured for any form of sexual activity - so she is not permitted to have such relations due to the harm caused to her in the process*.]

    *This is based on the hadith of the Prophet;
    Click this bar to view the full image.

    It was related on the authority of Abu Sa'id Sa'd bin Malik bin Sinan al-Khudri, radiyallahu 'anhu, that the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:

    لا ضرر ولا ضر
    "There is to be no harming, nor reciprocating of harm." (Musnad Ahmad, authenticated by Al-Albânî)
    "There should be neither harming nor reciprocating harm."

    [A excellent hadith which Ibn Majah, Al-Daraqutni and others related as of sound isnad, but which Malik related in his Muwatta' as of broken isnad, from 'Amr bin Yahya, from his father, from the Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, but dropping (the name of) Abu Sa'id. This hadith has lines of transmission which strengthen one another (so that it may be regarded as of sound isnad).]


    more explanation;
    http://fortyhadith.iiu.edu.my/hadith32.htm

    2) A young woman who has matured in every single way, but has not had her menses - then she is permitted to have sexual relations with her husband when she has had a valid marriage contract completed. This is because she will not be harmed through such relations since her body and mind has matured for it. [This may occur in countries like Antarctica where women at the age of 20 may have matured in every way except they have not had their periods due to the climate conditions.]


    3) Periods signify that a girl has the responsibilities in the religion such as prayer, fasting, etc. Just like boys with their first wet dreams.



    Mental & Emotional Maturity


    Girls and boys also reach mental maturity quicker in close climate nations because they are brought up this way by their culture and upbringing. This usually makes them mature more emotionally too.

    Think about it; if the norms in a culture are to marry early, then the upbringing by the parents will ensure that the child is brought up to mature and prepare for marriage at an earlier age.



    If someone can handle the it well, then what's the problem?


    In Islam, if someone is capable of being married and is mature in a way to handle its responsibilities, it is permitted in Islam for that person to get married, male or female. But if there will be any harm that could come to them through such a marriage, then the marriage should not go ahead, and may be annulled by the Islamic judge if there is harm in it.

    Marriage may be done earlier in Muslim nations because having any intimate relations outside of marriage is not permitted. Instead, it is to be done through a secure and safe relationship of marriage. This is why marriage is encouraged, because if a person is capable of having a relationship with someone else, then why not through a trustworthy relationship which both parties agree to?







    The marriage of Aisha




    There is a very strong proof we can use to show that Aisha (peace be upon her) had reached physical maturity before she moved into the Prophet’s house, and this is Aisha’s own statement in which she said:


    When the girl reaches nine years of age, she is a woman.


    (Sunan al-Tirmidhi, Kitab al-Nikah)


    This statement of Aisha shows that it was the norms in Arabia for a girl to mature on to become a young woman, i.e. become physically mature for marriage and its rights at the age of 9.




    Further, Aisha describes herself at the age of nine;
    Imam Ibn kathir (May Allah have mercy on him) narrates a hadith in his Al-Bidayah wa-Nihayah:
    "Imam Bukhari (May Allah have mercy on him) narrates another hadith which he heard from Farwa bin abi al-Mughria who heard from 'Ali bin Masher who heard from Hisham bin 'Urawh who heard from his father who reports from 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her), who said: 'When the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) was betrowth to me, I was six years old. Later, when we migrated from Makkah to Medina and stayed at bin harith bin khdhrj's place, I had grown up. My hair had got longer and I had physically matured; however, I still used to play with other girls...I was nine years old at that time."

    Source Page 210-211


    There are cases of this being the norms throughout the world, without any harm coming to the young woman. Its only lately that the ages have started to rise to above 15, abit more or less. This is likely due to the longer life expectancy of people today in comparison to the past.



    Married to a man who's 54?


    What we see is that the age of the man is largely irrelevant to the question, so long as he is still reasonably within the age of marriage. Prophet Muhammad had only around 12 white hairs when he passed away at the age of 63, and his description [see Shama'il Al Tirmidhi] proves he was not a senile old man like some people may think.

    Any marriage by a people is based on the cultural norms of the time. The marriage should be based on social norms. The Prophet Muhammad married according to the social norms of his society (marriage of younger women to older men was the norms), and we marry according to the social norms that we live in. Social norms are not a problem, so long as they do not contradict firmly set ethics, and it has been proven above that this marriage did not cause any harm to Aisha whatsoever, but caused a great deal of good. Every other marriage should be judged individually based on its own circumstances.





    Useful Links;

    Marriage in other nations throughout the world at early ages, and more in depth explanation on the issues addressed;
    http://www.islamic-life.com/forums/q...edophile-1441/

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..




    The word ‘Paedophilia’ is a subjective term. Some countries legalise marriage at the age of 16, others legalise it earlier and and others later. So in one country your a paedophile and in another you're not?


    There needs to be One firm ethical rule; If there will be harm in a marriage and intimate relations, such a person should not have intimate relations. If there will be no harm – then it is perfectly suitable for such a young adult to get married of their choice.

    If you question how one can figure this out, it is clear from seeing signs of their physical growth, aswell as seeing how this young adult is mentally and emotionally. If they are suited for it – then it is their right to go ahead with such a marriage relationship.





    Peace.
    Last edited by - Qatada -; 02-14-2011 at 02:20 PM.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..




    edit...
    Last edited by - Qatada -; 02-14-2011 at 02:20 PM.

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    Re: prophets marriage to aishah..

    Aisha (r.a) was mature unlike children nowadays[they are really annoying and stuff] but Masha'Allah she was like an adult [her behavior]!!
    In those old times it was normal, and no one was shocked when the prophet (s.a.w) married to Aisha (r.a) even the non-Muslims at that time did not say anything about it.

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