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Staying Single in Islam

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    Staying Single in Islam

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    Is marriage obligatory for a man who has does not have any desire for women or children and also does not have the means to support them because of poverty ?

    According to the below hadith :
    "And he who cannot marry should fast because fasting breaks those unwanted feelings.” (Muslim – Book of Marriage)

    So a man who cannot marry , has to fast all his life except for the 2 days of Eid ul Fitr and Eid ul Adha in order to enter paradise?
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Not all you life brother, maybe 2 days a week. Desire differs from person to person, Depends on your situation.

    I keep on putting it off, myself. Inshallah i will try my best ,if you dont fast then take certain things out your diet.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    No, the meaning of this hadith is that if you have desires, you should marry someone. If you do not have the means (money) to marry and support another person in your life, then fast. At the time, people would wonder why fasting would decrease your desire, but it has been found that it lowers levels of testosterone, thus lowering your desire.. This doesn't mean you should fast your whole life to get to jannah, it is just saying that it's a way to lower your desire since you don't plan on getting married.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Brother , I am sorry but it looks like you havent understood the question .
    Will a person enter hell if he choses to remain single because of any of below reasons

    1. No interest in women and children
    2 Poverty.


    This is what the quran and hadith says

    "When a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion, so let him fear for the remaining half.

    Prophet (saaw) said: " Marriage my tradition who so ever keeps away there from it is not from amongst me"


    Please explain on what you think what would be the fate of such person
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Marrying is sunnah so people say that you don't HAVE to marry, but you should do it in order to be a part of his Ummah (nation)... There are ayats saying that you must obey Allah s.w.t. and his Messenger s.a.w. so in that way, I think we might be obligated to get married because Allah commands us to do as the prophet s.a.w. did.. Also, I think it is impossible for you to restrain your desires til the end, so I suggest you find a means of earning money, save it up for a few years, and start your life inshallah.. Wish you the best!
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Brother, I think you should get married because there will be a time where you might desire a married life. It is what humans are like. We tend to think a certain way and believe we will maintain it until we reach a point in our lives when it's too late (you can't really find a suitable wife when you're 55 now can you lol).. I don't think Allah s.w.t. will punish people for being poor.. If you're financially unstable and cannot afford to marry, then like I said, inshallah He will give you opportunities and chances to find a better job and earn HALAL money.. It will take some time but you should have patience and He will be just to all who strive in the right path.. I don't think He will punish you if you cannot afford to do so for He knows best and He knows your intentions.. Also, I think what is being said by that hadith is that by getting married you fulfill half of your religion because you're staying away from zina and those types of harmful sins.. The remaining half is doing right in your life and worshipping the One who deserves to be worshipped. I would take this question to a scholar though. A good website, WHICH ACTUALLY WILL GIVE YOU A RESPOND IN A FEW DAYS, is www.amjaonline.com On the left side there is a fatwa corner under which it says "send a question"... I recommend you send a question and be as clear as possible so they don't mistake it like I did and just explain the hadith.. Tell them if this will make you go to jahannam, even though I don't think so if you maintain a truly Islamic life.. But the prophet s.a.w. was wise in his saying because it is impossible to stay away from zina if you never marry. Maybe if you have a lot of imaan and taqwa, but most of the time people don't.. Please send your question on that site and give them your email address and inshallah they will respond.. Usually sites never respond to my questions but that is one site I am blessed to know about. Also, please post something in response to my post when you get the answer because I would also like to know more on this subject.. Jazak Allah brother.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem,

    As-Salaamu 'Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh,

    If one cannot do something then Allah will not punish him for it, this is a common principle in Islam.

    You can refer to Dr.Saleh as-Saleh's lectures on Basic Rulings and Foundations of Fiqh.

    You may want to read the following notes on Princple 4.

    Which is entitled Obligation is dependant upon ability. There is no obligation
    with inability, and nothing is forbidden with necessity.


    Two points you brought up,

    1. Not marrying because you are not attracted to anyone and have no desire.

    2. Because of poverty.

    If you want to marry and you are poor the solution is one thing and if you are in position 1 then the ruling etc is in another thing dear brother.

    Insha'Allah someone with knowledge will reply to you.

    Br.al-Habeshi
    Staying Single in Islam

    The path is long but I hope we meet,
    After the grave and the Day, in paradise in bliss upon a reclined seat.

    A traveler traveling - travelled from shirk to tawheed,
    If I'm remembered for anything - let it be the Mercy I seek.

    Your Bro. Abu Hurayra, al-Habeshi
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    I think it is impossible for you to restrain your desires til the end, so I suggest you find a means of earning money, save it up for a few years, and start your life inshallah.. Wish you the best.
    Nothing is impossible in this world and I need no suggestions for earning and saving money and starting a life because i dont have any such problems.

    I just wanted an answer to the question "what is Allah's punishment for a man doesnt marry because he is not attracted to woman and has no desire ?"
    will he be sent to hell forever or for a limited period (lets say a for eg : 1000 years)


    I would take this question to a scholar though .A good website, WHICH ACTUALLY WILL GIVE YOU A RESPOND IN A FEW DAYS, is www.amjaonline.com On the left side there is a fatwa corner under which it says "send a question"... I recommend you send a question and be as clear as possible so they don't mistake it like I did and just explain the hadith.Please send your question on that site and give them your email address and inshallah they will respond.
    Well thanks for the site , i will let you know their response.Jazak Allah, sister

    if you are in position 1 then the ruling etc is in another thing dear brother.

    Insha'Allah someone with knowledge will reply to you.
    Well thats a bit of disappointment , honestly i thought you might just know the answer to that ,but thanks anyways . Jazak Allah, brother
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    I'm sorry I didn't mean to offend you or anything.. I was just trying as a Muslim to help you out lol I didn't know that you were just curious. Sorry anyway.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Assalamu Alaikum

    If he has no desire (as in he's impotent), then it is not obligatory for him to marry. Although, if he does have desires but is restricting himself from marriage for purposes of being more pious, like secluding and isolating himself, this may be considered a sin. If it concerns poverty, then he should fast and wait for Allah's help in that, but he shouldn't restrict himself marriage. Specify which case it is, otherwise if you are just searching for the punishment, know that every punishment of Allah is most severe, and you should not concern yourself with the punishment of Allah for committing a wrong act, but rather pleasing Him and hoping for His forgiveness for your sins and for His blessings upon you being a righteous and worthy slave.


    fi aman allah
    wa'alaikum asalaam
    Last edited by *charisma*; 12-27-2008 at 10:21 PM.
    Staying Single in Islam

    D e a t h

    is the easiest
    of all things after it
    ; ;

    the hardest
    of all things before it
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Bisimillah.
    Asalam Alaykum Warakmatulah Wabrkatuh.
    Brother if you want to put your whole life as a lonely person who only has one goal , and that is to please Allah that I think is fine but why I ask you?
    There are three reasons why not:
    1. You won't have a spouse in heaven.
    2. You will regret it one day.
    3. When you get old who's going to take care of you?
    My brother do not try to be a nun* as I am only speaking for your good. I know what you want but everything has a negative reaction one way or another so think about it once more and reply. Hope everything is good and inshallah you will find your destiny.
    Your Brother in Islam Yanal.
    *= the definition for nun is : a person who does not marry for religious reasons or takes a vow towards god.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Salaam alikum

    If he has no desire (as in he's impotent), then it is not obligatory for him to marry. Although, if he does have desires but is restricting himself from marriage for purposes of being more pious, like secluding and isolating himself, this may be considered a sin.
    Well ,what do can u say about :

    1. Man who cant marry because he is not interested in having a family and wants to dedicate his whole life to professional work , development and research . A fine example of such a muslim is the former Indian president Abdul kalam.

    2.A rich man who does not want to get married because he doesnt want to face all the problems arising out of marriage such as domestic quarrels with his wife and children's tantrums .He just doesnt want this tension( along with this workplace tension) in his life and has thus decided not to get married .

    if you are just searching for the punishment, know that every punishment of Allah is most severe, and you should not concern yourself with the punishment of Allah for committing a wrong act
    I must say that you are wrong , there because Allah wants us to be concerned and that EXACTLY WHY he has described the hell more in detail than the heaven in the Quran and Hadith because he wants us to be frightened of hell and do good deeds ,below are examples of punishment mentioned in quran and hadith

    Just FYI : Below are examples of different punishments for different types of people in Jahannam

    1. A miser who doesnt give zakah : His cash will turn into snakes and bite him

    2. Tyrant : will be beaten by maces of iron and boiling(hameem) water of blood and pus will .

    3 Committing Suicide by stabbing himself : will be stabbing himself all the time in hell in his period of punishment

    4. Similarly a person who doesnt marry because of personal reasons or similar ones such as those mentioned in the above 2 points ---???????????????????????????

    And Thats the answer that i am looking for ?

    why I ask you?
    There are three reasons why not:

    1. You won't have a spouse in heaven.
    That shouldnt be a Problem in heaven because heaven has more than enough treasures (such as the food and drinks ) and other unimaginable wonders to keep him occupied . A person can get WHATEVER HE WANTS in heaven ,

    2 You will regret it one day.
    Again this is something that differs from person to person .I know quite a guys who have never bothered to get married( AND HAVE NOT COMMITED ANY UNLAWFUL ACTS EITHER ) and have no regrets.
    What is one person's treasure can be another person's trash .

    3. When you get old who's going to take care of you?
    Home for the aged can take care of people that are old and who are rich enough can afford servants , others might adopt children from orphanages

    I suggest you do some research before you post such questions and stop calling me a nun ,impotent or something similar as I have already said that i dont have any such problem like that. (See my post above) . I just need an answer to the question which i have asked and if you cant give me that answer , then thats fine , just dont fill this thread about "importance of marriage" as that is not the question here and I would really appreciate if you stay on topic here , brother.

    Walikum salaam
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem,

    As-Salaamu 'Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh,

    Here is an extract from A Summary of Islamic Jurisprudence Vol.2 p.352-3

    Different Rulings on Marriage

    According to the Shari'ah (Islamic Law), ther are five rulings on marriage: obligatory, desirable, allowable, prohibited, and detestable. Marriage becomes obligatory for those who fear commiting zina (adultery or fornication), as marriage is a means of chastity and avoidance of what is prohibited. In this connection, Shaykhul-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy upon him) said,

    "If one is in need of marriage and he fears committing a sin by leaving it, one may give priority to getting marriage over performing obligatory Pilgrimage."5

    Others view that marriage, for such a person, is more preferable than supererogatory Pilgrimage, Fasting, or Prayer. They also maintain that in this case one's financial state does not matter. Sheikh Taqiyyud-Din said:

    "According to the apparent view of Ahmad as well as the majority of the scholars, one should not consider wealth before marriage, as Allah, Exalted be He, says, [al:Habeshi: translation of the meaning]"...If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty..." (Qur'an: An-Nur:32) Even the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) sometimes had nothing in his house as well6. He (PBUH) once concluded marriage for a man who could not even afford a ring of iron (as a dowry)."7

    Marriage becomes desirable when there is a desire [or libido], but there is no fear of committing unlawful sexual intercourse, as mariage involves many benefits for both men and women.

    Marriage becomes allowable when there is no lust, but there is a desire for marriage itself, such as the case with the impotent and the old. However, in such cases marriage might be detestable, as it deprives the wife of the actual purpose of marriage, namely safeguarding her chastity, as a husband's impotency causes a wife great harm.

    Marriage becomes prohibited for a Muslim man who lives in a disbelieving country engaged in way with Muslims. Marriage in this case may expose his family to danger and being captured by disbelievers. In addition, he will not feel secure for his wife living among them.

    Footnotes

    5. See the footnote in "Ar-Rawd Al-Murbi'" [6/228]
    6. Al-Bukhari (2566) [5/243] and Muslim (7378) [9/308]
    7. Al-Bukhari (5087) [9/164] and Muslim (4372) [5/215]

    It then goes on to talk about the types of ladies to marry.

    I hope the above helps a little and Allah knows best.

    What the sister said about being impotent that is kind of true, though this may end up being a reason for the wife to get a divorce, as she has the right to that type of thing. You can find various fatawa about this, this is one.


    Br.al-Habeshi

    Staying Single in Islam

    The path is long but I hope we meet,
    After the grave and the Day, in paradise in bliss upon a reclined seat.

    A traveler traveling - travelled from shirk to tawheed,
    If I'm remembered for anything - let it be the Mercy I seek.

    Your Bro. Abu Hurayra, al-Habeshi
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    format_quote Originally Posted by Confused0122 View Post
    Also, I think it is impossible for you to restrain your desires til the end
    I disagree; after a certain age your "desires" start to decrease fast. You will not remain young forever. I'm only 32 and have almost lost my interest in women, and don't intend to marry. I'm really not interested in having children either. Are there even women who would want me in this case? I seriously doubt it. Unfortunately, I don't have any siblings, so my parents are the only people I have in my life. This makes my decision a very difficult one, since I could face complete loneliness once my parents die.
    Last edited by Argamemnon; 12-31-2008 at 06:43 PM.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    format_quote Originally Posted by Argamemnon View Post
    I disagree; after a certain age your "desires" start to decrease fast. You will not remain young forever. I'm only 32 and have almost lost my interest in women, and don't intend to marry. I'm really not interested in having children either. Are there even women who would want me in this case? I seriously doubt it. Unfortunately, I don't have any siblings, so my parents are the only people I have in my life. This makes my decision a very difficult one, since I could face complete loneliness once my parents die.

    I agree with you, brother. Each and every person is different. I was just saying, that for the most part, the majority of people can't control themselves for too long. Anyway, I'm in the same situation. My parents have one daughter to look to so life gets complicated at times and I wonder what life would be like if I choose not to get married.
    Staying Single in Islam

    "Kind speech and forgiveness are better than charity followed by injury. And Allah is Free of need and Forbearing."
    Al-Baqara verse 263 (2:263)


    wwwislamicboardcom - Staying Single in Islam
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    format_quote Originally Posted by Confused0122 View Post
    I would take this question to a scholar though. A good website, WHICH ACTUALLY WILL GIVE YOU A RESPOND IN A FEW DAYS, is www.amjaonline.com On the left side there is a fatwa corner under which it says "send a question"... I recommend you send a question and be as clear as possible so they don't mistake it like I did and just explain the hadith.. Tell them if this will make you go to jahannam, even though I don't think so if you maintain a truly Islamic life.. But the prophet s.a.w. was wise in his saying because it is impossible to stay away from zina if you never marry. Maybe if you have a lot of imaan and taqwa, but most of the time people don't.. Please send your question on that site and give them your email address and inshallah they will respond.. Usually sites never respond to my questions but that is one site I am blessed to know about. Also, please post something in response to my post when you get the answer because I would also like to know more on this subject.. Jazak Allah brother.
    Finally got the answer to that and he is taken quite some time to reply

    http://amjaonline.com/en_f_details.php?fid=77271


    What will be Allah's punishment for a man who does not marry because he is not attracted to women?


    There wouldn't be any punishment for him at all. If a man does not want to marry because he is not physically in need of marriage, that would be completely up to him. It might even be preferable for him not to marry because, in such a case, he might fall short in fulfilling his partner's conjugal needs.
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    woah this was posted 2 years ago ....did you get a response bro Airforce?
    Staying Single in Islam

    "Allah! La ilaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), Al-Hayyul-Qayyum (the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists).".."[Al Qur'aan 3:2]
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    ibn taymiyyah (rh) was single all his life
    Staying Single in Islam




    IT solutions company based in Luton providing computer support and repair service to small business and home users in Luton and surrounding areas.

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    http://ruqyah.org/



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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    format_quote Originally Posted by Muslim World 12 View Post
    woah this was posted 2 years ago ....did you get a response bro Airforce?
    Yes , as you can see from the very last post, that they have responded Just a bit suprised as to why you've brought this up now.
    Staying Single in Islam

    When truth is hurled at falsehood , falsehood perishes. because falsehood by its nature is bound to perish [21:18- Holy quran]
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    Re: Staying Single in Islam

    Why in the world dont you wanna get married ??! i mean what are you going to lose....a bit of cash but a radiant face resting on the pillow next to you in the morning is something you should have desire for
    Last edited by Cabdullahi; 01-12-2010 at 06:29 PM.
    chat Quote


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