My original question posed on another forum [I was going to edit the question in light of the replies made but I decided not to]
Just wondering.
Seen several marriage CV's in my time and the requirement is for the sis to be educated to degree level or going on to uni etc etc.
Alhamdulillah I'm in my second year at the mo but...If you ask most brothers they'll say they dont want their wives working after marriage. And since a degree + PGCE means a job for most of us... What is the point wanting the sis to have a degree but not wanting her to work?
Why not go for a sis who only has her A-Levels then?
Good questions, I hope brothers, married and unmarried, will answer.
Let me share with you my thoughts.
Firstly, marriage CV?? HAHAHA sounds so funny...
And now to the point:
What is the point wanting the sis to have a degree but not wanting her to work?
That work part I seriously cannot answer without becoming offensive.
Why not go for a sis who only has her A-Levels then?
If you think about it, your degree and how much you study and what, gives you a status in the society. It is as simple as that.
Some think it is necessary, for example in times of need, the woman can also work (if he doesn't want her to work in "normal conditions" (meaning he works)) without the degree-problems. Or that it shows that the woman has chosen to broaden her knowledge and was/is into something, shows interest and intelect. To study, today, doesn't just show you are smart or have the means to, but also that you have some kind of perspective in your life, you are motivated and aim somewhere, something interests you so much that you want to actually keep your nose in the books and fulfill the high quality the work demands and that you are someone who can keep the quality high for the enxt generation (educated parents want to educate their children (this is just very, very general and I am aware of several situations/factors that are not like this, same goes with precentage)).
“If only I had checked myself”
—
Guy who wrecked himself
True leaders don't create followers...
.... They create new leaders.
...I wonder at the one who extends his right hand
To his beloved at the time of seperation and he hastens therein!
I felt weak and incapable of saying farewell when I saw him
So my heart shook his hand whilst my eye wept....
I'd prefer it if my wife didn't work, solely because of the fitna that is prevalent in the mixed sex workplace. If there was a chance that she could find a place that is free from such things, then Alhamdulilah, I'd be 100% supportive, but I believe in this day and age, it would be a big ask.
Of course, if circumstances are such that she has to work, then her being degree educated would help her to get a good job.
That being said, I wouldn't mind either way, whether she was degree educated, or just finished A-Level, as long as she was a good muslim.
what about you?,she will infact have a greater worry as you being her beloved husband than yourself, since seduction or getting seducted is our greatest weakness(men)
Is that what you thought would've been offensive? Worry not, sister, I wouldn't have found that offensive at all.
Back to the main question. Al-Zaara hit it when she said about the finding a place in society; in many's opinion, education is not only about the job and money, but about the stature, respect, and it shows that the person is persevering, and has gone down the road of perhaps years of study, again leading back to respect.
Should I seek a source of law other than God, when it is He Who has sent down unto you the Book (Qur'an) fully explained? And those whom We have given them the Book know that it has been sent down from the Lord with truth, so be not of those in doubt.
the only thing i would worry about is harassment because women are vulnerable but cheating and other things of the same form ,we are both in danger of falling into,with us men being more prone,the best is for both to stay at home but with the credit crunch it ain't gonna happen,you might be homeless in like a week,so for both to work is the only way to tackle financial problems and to earn bread to live but that aslo has its downfall because valuable time between you two are lost.......i dont know its crazy
Last edited by Cabdullahi; 01-05-2009 at 07:49 PM.
Is that what you thought would've been offensive? Worry not, sister, I wouldn't have found that offensive at all.
Back to the main question. Al-Zaara hit it when she said about the finding a place in society; in many's opinion, education is not only about the job and money, but about the stature, respect, and it shows that the person is persevering, and has gone down the road of perhaps years of study, again leading back to respect.
the sister clearly shows crystal clear signs that she has contracted the feminist bug,always on the offensive
The kind of fitnah I had in mind above was the pervy looks, pervy comments and other forms of pervy harrassment that is so common in the office environment these days. I'd feel too protective of my wife, to let her go into such an environment.
Junior, as the man of the house, it would be my duty to earn the bread, there is no getting out of it, regardless of the fitna that is out there. Women, however, don't need to work (i.e. it is not obligatory upon them).
i fully understand brother,thats what it has become these days,women in the workplace i worked in were extra friendly and flirtatious and if a sister is put in the above environment then people(men) would just think she's a weirdo simply because she's different from the other 'sewage girls' as i call them,and that could make the sister become a target and therefore be taunted
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