As-salamu alaikum wa rathmatullah,
Welcome to the forum.
Sister, you first have to find the right perspective to conclude the situation you are in. Let me "lecture"...
You said "
As a Muslim I believe everything is in the hands of god, only god can control what happens to us and for my "religious" dad whose contantly preaching the religion to try and control everything I believe is so wrong and utterly frustrating."
=======Hadith======
"Anas ibn Malik reported: A man said, “O Messenger of Allah, should I tie my camel and trust in Allah, or should I leave her untied and trust in Allah?” The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Tie her and trust in Allah.”
Source used:
http://dailyhadith.abuaminaelias.com...orldly-causes/
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We as Muslims have to do whatever is in our power and ability that Allah has given us and what is outside, that is what is outside our control. So your father giving you the "lecture"...say "ALHAMDULILLAH", that you have such a father. I know we always tend to look from our own perspective, but we have to look from Allah's perspective. There are fathers that don't care with whom their daughter hangs out with..there are fathers that don't even care what their daughter does. There are fathers that are even ashamed of having a daughter as it is a "disgrace" to the "family honor".
Allah in the Qur'an MANY..MANY..MANY times repeats things over and over and over again. The question is WHY? I mean i know the story of for example Adam(as)..how come Allah yet again repeats it in a later surah? There is wisdom in it. We tend to forget things very easily. So instead of seeing as tiring..rather be thankful that your father yet again repeats the things you already know.
There are many sisters that age of yours who are being reeled in by loverboys or even introduced to loverboys by their own friends. Your father is a human being that has SEEN most probably some sick stuff in his life.
What your father is doing is not "preventing" you mentally to develop, rather he is again and again creating the boundaries where you mentally can develop.
So in other words this Allah also has done for us. Allah has told us NO alcohol..NO drugs..NO killing..NO marrying certain types of people..NO eating pork..NO speaking filthy words..etc. etc.
These "no's" are boundaries that Allah has given us and within those boundaries we can do whatever we want. We can drink tea, fruit juices, water, coffee and other kind of beverages..we can use
all kind of herbs to eat. We can marry our cousin, the boy/girl next door (with certain rulings off course)..the boy/girl in the neighboring country of on the other side of the world. We can eat fish, beef, lam, goat, chicken, turkey, birds..
So with you instead of getting annoyed by it..listen to your dad..respect him and love him for his care. There are parents that TRY TO FORCE people to worship sticks and stones..be very grateful your dad is the one that is worshiping his and your Rab and teaching you to do the same. There are even children who have never had a dad or died a long time ago before they could have spent some time with him. Just imagine that your dad would go back to Allah tomorrow..how much would you miss him or even wanting to listen to him lecturing you.
Please try to re-read this comment and if you are confused about something..do ask for clarification.
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