honest answers.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

there are some things in our cultures that are deemed as abhorrent and so naturally we tend to develop some kind of dislike towards them and towards those who practice them. these "things" can be based on what is considered in Islam to be sinful.

however, if a Muslim/your friend/anyone in general came up to you worried/complaining:

"i think i have homosexual tendencies"
"i committed zina"
"i fear of falling into zina"
"i have a girlfriend"
"I have a boyfriend"
"i have rebelled against my parents"
"i cheated on my husband" (i'll leave out the "i have cheated on my wife," becuase no-one usually cares about that)
"i feel to weak to wear the hijab"

how would you react? the above are just some examples illustrating that these are the types of problems that occur in our communities which aren't acceptable

remember that they aren't coming to you becuase they think its something good or want that certain thing legitimized, but are coming to you because they recognize what they are doing is wrong and need help in dealing with it/changing themselves...how would you react?

honestly?

remember that these these are considered taboo so its likely that we are going to have some kind emotion against it.

would you judge them? honestly?

 

[Muslimeen]

However, if a Muslim/your friend/anyone in general came up to you worried/complaining:

"i think i have homosexual tendencies"
My Response: A punch in the face. I simply don't believe in this. I just can't grasp it. Unfortunately, I am not the best person to discuss this with.

"i committed zina"
My Response: Why you telling me? Ask Allah for forgiveness, you have broken his rules not mine. Do not expose your sin if Allah has concealed it. Might sound a bit harsh, but I don't want to harbour ill thoughts about another muslim, or think I am superior because I did not commit the sin he has committed. The sin has already been committed, there is nothing I can do about it.

"i fear of falling into zina"
My Response: Fear Allah and remember death often.

"i have a girlfriend"
My Response: Perform Nikah, and resort to taubah in abundance.

"I have a boyfriend"
My Response: Perform Nikah, and resort to taubah in abundance.

"i have rebelled against my parents"
My Response: Would depend on the circumstances, if it is for the pleasure of Allah or for materialistic reasons. If for Allah, then perservere, but still don't be disrespectful in other matters. If for material reasons, then explain the importance of respect to ones parents.

"i cheated on my husband" (i'll leave out the "i have cheated on my wife," becuase no-one usually cares about that)
My response, In both cases, fear Allah, make taubah, and remember Allah is most forgiving.

"i feel to weak to wear the hijab"
My Response: When are you going to feel strong? Honestly, it's like a person saying I feel too weak to read Salaah or fast in ramadaan. If it would help, explain to them the importance of Hijaab.

In all of the above cases, our human tendencies is to become judgemental. However I would try my best not to think low of that person and try to help him or her as far as possible, and thank Allah for assisting me from not falling prey to these evils and not think that I am better than anyone else just because he has committed a sin. Guidance is from Allah alone.