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Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

  1. #1
    RisingLight's Avatar Full Member
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    Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

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    Salam alaikum

    I hope you are all good.I have read a lot of time before that it is important in islam to keep family ties,but i never paid attention to it as i didnt need it.

    Now in shaa Allah within this year i will be thousands of km away from everyone and i can practise islam freerly and start a new life.Do i still have to keep ties with the people in my family circle?

    Im not talking about my parents,id still talk to them,cant break their heart and dissapear, but aunts,cousins,uncles whatever it is,i feel no love for them.They hate muslims and give hased,backbite etc,i just dont want to deal with people like that. Is it allowed if i just dont dissapear for them(no call,no social media etc),since they are anti islam?
    I just want to leave and dissapear,but i read that keeping ties is very important and i just read this hadith too:

    “O people! Spread (the greeting of) Salam, feed others, uphold the ties of kinship, and pray during the night when people are sleeping, and you will enter Paradise with Salam.” [Ibn Majah]

    I will feed others one day in shaa Allah and i do the other 2 but upholding ties of kinship with these kind of people i can never do.Now i just dislike them more for knowing they stand again in the road toward jannah.Is there any exception in my case?

    JazakhAllahu Khair


    Please dont say keep the ties to make dawah.If i was good at dawah i wouldnt be still a secret after all these years.I couldnt stop a guy from leaving islam,one only prayed 1 time and the other prayed a few days and went into a more haram life and in prison.There were two girls who started praying but they left it too eventually.Im pretty bad at this lol...
    Last edited by RisingLight; 02-07-2019 at 03:13 AM.
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    Nájlá's Avatar
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    Re: Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    Brother,

    Now I understand your anger at them and how you want to cut ties with them. If they are not harming you then keep your contact with them.

    "It may be that you dislike something which is good for you, and it may be you like something which is bad for you".

    Keep it clean between you and them, let the hearts be at peace even if you dislike how they are. This is for your own sake, for your own after life. It is so much easier today to do that even just a text msg. It is not something you have to do everyday but it is something you have to do from time to time with your relatives. This is a reminder to myself before you. I need to make much effort to contact family.
    Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    Three simple rules in life:

    1) If you do not go after what you want, you will never have it
    2) If you don't ask, the answer will always be no.
    3) If you do not step forward, you'll always be in the same place
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    RisingLight's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    format_quote Originally Posted by Nájlá View Post
    Brother,

    Now I understand your anger at them and how you want to cut ties with them. If they are not harming you then keep your contact with them.

    "It may be that you dislike something which is good for you, and it may be you like something which is bad for you".

    Keep it clean between you and them, let the hearts be at peace even if you dislike how they are. This is for your own sake, for your own after life. It is so much easier today to do that even just a text msg. It is not something you have to do everyday but it is something you have to do from time to time with your relatives. This is a reminder to myself before you. I need to make much effort to contact family.
    Alaikum salam.
    Thanks for your msg and for the idea of just sending a text message.Its like sending a letter in a way.If this was medieval times,thats how we would communicate.I will try to do that.Im glad it served as a reminder to you as well.
    May Allah keep you safe
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    MazharShafiq's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    No Muslim is obliged to mix with kaafir relatives if he cannot bear their mistreatment, but he should strive to bear their mistreatment with patience and call them to Islam.
    Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    27y9utc 1 - Keeping ties of kinship.Important?
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    azc's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    format_quote Originally Posted by RisingLight View Post
    Salam alaikum

    I hope you are all good.I have read a lot of time before that it is important in islam to keep family ties,but i never paid attention to it as i didnt need it.

    Now in shaa Allah within this year i will be thousands of km away from everyone and i can practise islam freerly and start a new life.Do i still have to keep ties with the people in my family circle?

    Im not talking about my parents,id still talk to them,cant break their heart and dissapear, but aunts,cousins,uncles whatever it is,i feel no love for them.They hate muslims and give hased,backbite etc,i just dont want to deal with people like that. Is it allowed if i just dont dissapear for them(no call,no social media etc),since they are anti islam?
    I just want to leave and dissapear,but i read that keeping ties is very important and i just read this hadith too:

    “O people! Spread (the greeting of) Salam, feed others, uphold the ties of kinship, and pray during the night when people are sleeping, and you will enter Paradise with Salam.” [Ibn Majah]

    I will feed others one day in shaa Allah and i do the other 2 but upholding ties of kinship with these kind of people i can never do.Now i just dislike them more for knowing they stand again in the road toward jannah.Is there any exception in my case?

    JazakhAllahu Khair


    Please dont say keep the ties to make dawah.If i was good at dawah i wouldnt be still a secret after all these years.I couldnt stop a guy from leaving islam,one only prayed 1 time and the other prayed a few days and went into a more haram life and in prison.There were two girls who started praying but they left it too eventually.Im pretty bad at this lol...
    You have quoted the hadith to have good ties with relatives. Then what do you want from us...?

    If you want to follow hadith to keep your relationship intact with your relatives, do it or if you want to sever then do, what we can do. It's your personal matter.

    However, severing ties with them isn't good for your akhirah.

    Choice is yours

    - - - Updated - - -



    - - - Updated - - -

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    RisingLight's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Keeping ties of kinship.Important?

    format_quote Originally Posted by MazharShafiq View Post
    No Muslim is obliged to mix with kaafir relatives if he cannot bear their mistreatment, but he should strive to bear their mistreatment with patience and call them to Islam.
    I see,i will try to bear it with patience as much as i can bear.Thanks brother.Wish you all the best

    format_quote Originally Posted by azc View Post
    You have quoted the hadith to have good ties with relatives. Then what do you want from us...?

    If you want to follow hadith to keep your relationship intact with your relatives, do it or if you want to sever then do, what we can do. It's your personal matter.

    However, severing ties with them isn't good for your akhirah.

    Choice is yours

    - - - Updated - - -



    - - - Updated - - -

    I know the choice is mine,but i asked for advice,cuz not everything is black and white.Thanks anyway for your time and answer.Alaikum salam
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