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I'm worried I lost the rewards of my trial and calamity

  1. #1
    Studentofdeed's Avatar Full Member
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    I'm worried I lost the rewards of my trial and calamity

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    I have been tested by Allah. The first thing I did was say Alhamdullah and say inniali wa inali Rajoon. Allahuma jurnee we musabatee wa Aklaf khairan minha.
    I keep making dua telling Allah that I accept his decree but I feel guitly for being sad and crying about sometimes. I am trying sometimes yet sometimes I fear that me being sad is rejecting Allah's decree.
    I feel bad because I truly am trying. I'm not even sure if everything I do is even sincere
    I love Allah but sometimes I feel bothered if people dont like me. I feel like if people dont like me then Allah doesnt like me. People use me and hate me. In the mosque no one likes me. The imam is always manipulating me. I brought up the issue of racism many times but rather against me I brought it up against my revert friend. The imam said they are sensitive when I do indeed know people can be so mean. The imam doesnt want people to ask around whh and what if they found out racism is in the mosque. This is what he said. But I truly belive that's how you get things fixed.
    In trying to be good muslim but sometimes I feel like I'm pretending to.be something I'm not. If people hate me and say I'm a bad person doesnt that mean Allah hates me? I'm trying to have patience. I'm not complaining against Allah and in fact I prayed istikhara and Allah answered my dua very fast and I realized it was in my favor. Yet I feel guitly for crying and still being sad. I love Allah but I fear I commited kufr and was being ungrateful. Did I fail this trial? Is Allah angry because I was not patient?
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    taha_'s Avatar Full Member
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    Re: I'm worried I lost the rewards of my trial and calamity

    format_quote Originally Posted by Studentofdeed View Post
    I have been tested by Allah. The first thing I did was say Alhamdullah and say inniali wa inali Rajoon. Allahuma jurnee we musabatee wa Aklaf khairan minha.
    I keep making dua telling Allah that I accept his decree but I feel guitly for being sad and crying about sometimes. I am trying sometimes yet sometimes I fear that me being sad is rejecting Allah's decree.
    I feel bad because I truly am trying. I'm not even sure if everything I do is even sincere
    I love Allah but sometimes I feel bothered if people dont like me. I feel like if people dont like me then Allah doesnt like me. People use me and hate me. In the mosque no one likes me. The imam is always manipulating me. I brought up the issue of racism many times but rather against me I brought it up against my revert friend. The imam said they are sensitive when I do indeed know people can be so mean. The imam doesnt want people to ask around whh and what if they found out racism is in the mosque. This is what he said. But I truly belive that's how you get things fixed.
    In trying to be good muslim but sometimes I feel like I'm pretending to.be something I'm not. If people hate me and say I'm a bad person doesnt that mean Allah hates me? I'm trying to have patience. I'm not complaining against Allah and in fact I prayed istikhara and Allah answered my dua very fast and I realized it was in my favor. Yet I feel guitly for crying and still being sad. I love Allah but I fear I commited kufr and was being ungrateful. Did I fail this trial? Is Allah angry because I was not patient?
    Assalam o Alaikum rahamutullahi wa barakuthu.

    This is shaytan's work. He is trying to make you despair Allah. Simply just ignore him. Try to reflect on 99 names of Allah, then you will know Him in sha Allah.

    Did Prophet Ayyub peace be upon him when he lost his worldly possession say "Why did Allah do this to me?". No.... Did Prophet yusuf peace be upon him also say same? No. What about Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him when he peace be upon him lost Hazrat khadija and his uncle? No. They peace be upon them were patient.

    in Hadith Qudsi :
    On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:
    A man sinned greatly against himself, and when death came to him he charged his sons, saying: When I have died, burn me, then crush me and scatter [my ashes] into the sea, for, by Allah, if my Lord takes possession of me, He will punish me in a manner in which He has punished no one [else]. So they did that to him. Then He said to the earth: Produce what you have taken-and there he was! And He said to him: What induced you to do what you did? He said: Being afraid of You, O my Lord (or he said: Being frightened of You) and because of that He forgave him. It was related by Muslim (also by al-Bukhari, an-Nasa'i and Ibn Majah).


    عَنْ أَبي هُرَيْرَةَ ، رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ ، عَنِ النَّبَيِّ صَلَّى الله عَلَيْهِ وَ سَلَّمَ ، قَالَ :

    أَسْرَفَ رَجُلٌ عَلي نَفْسِهِ ، فَلَمَّا حَضَرَهُ المَوْتُ أَوْصَى بَنِيه ، فَقَالَ : إِذَا أَنَا مِتُّ فَأَحْرِقُوني ، ثُمَّ اسْحَقُوني ، ثُمَّ أَذْرُوني في البَحْرِ فَوَاللهِ لَئِنْ قَدَرَ عَلَيَّ رَبِّي لَيُعَذَّبَنِّي عَذَاباً ، مَا عَذَّبَهُ أَحَداً ، فَفَعَلُوا ذَلِكَ بِهِ . فَقَالَ لِلْأَرْضِ : أَدِّي مَا أَخَذْتِ ، فَإِذا هُوَ قَائِمٌ ، فَقَالَ لَهُ : مَا حَمَلَكَ عَلَي مَا صَنَعْتَ ؟ قَالَ : خَشْيَتُكَ يَا رَبِّ ، أَوْ مَخَافَتُكَ . فَغَفَرَ لَهُ بِذَلِكَ .

    رواهُ مسلم (وكذلك البخاري والنسائي وابن ماجه)
    Arabic/English book reference : Hadith 32


    This man was a sinner yet he was forgiven! Even he didn't know that Allah has power to resurrect. See how Allah, who is Al Ghafoor, will always forgive without hesitation. He will alway forgive again again and again. So don't let shaytan attack you, we are all human beings, we all make mistakes.. That's why it is important to know more about Allah to keep your faith strong. Read his 99 names, learn them and memorize them.

    May Allah bless you and protect you from shaytan.
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    I'm worried I lost the rewards of my trial and calamity

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  4. #3
    'Abdullah's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: I'm worried I lost the rewards of my trial and calamity

    format_quote Originally Posted by Studentofdeed View Post
    I have been tested by Allah. The first thing I did was say Alhamdullah and say inniali wa inali Rajoon. Allahuma jurnee we musabatee wa Aklaf khairan minha.
    I keep making dua telling Allah that I accept his decree but I feel guitly for being sad and crying about sometimes. I am trying sometimes yet sometimes I fear that me being sad is rejecting Allah's decree.
    I feel bad because I truly am trying. I'm not even sure if everything I do is even sincere
    I love Allah but sometimes I feel bothered if people dont like me. I feel like if people dont like me then Allah doesnt like me. People use me and hate me. In the mosque no one likes me. The imam is always manipulating me. I brought up the issue of racism many times but rather against me I brought it up against my revert friend. The imam said they are sensitive when I do indeed know people can be so mean. The imam doesnt want people to ask around whh and what if they found out racism is in the mosque. This is what he said. But I truly belive that's how you get things fixed.
    In trying to be good muslim but sometimes I feel like I'm pretending to.be something I'm not. If people hate me and say I'm a bad person doesnt that mean Allah hates me? I'm trying to have patience. I'm not complaining against Allah and in fact I prayed istikhara and Allah answered my dua very fast and I realized it was in my favor. Yet I feel guitly for crying and still being sad. I love Allah but I fear I commited kufr and was being ungrateful. Did I fail this trial? Is Allah angry because I was not patient?
    Assalam O Alaikum WaRahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh,

    Let's look at the example of our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) who was without any doubt best among all human beings and the one whose moral character is praised by Allah himself in the Quran. People called him magician, poet, madman, soothsayer, etc and these were none other but his own community. This is something Quran has confirmed:
    And it is not the word of a poet; little do you believe. [Quran 69:41]
    Nor the word of a soothsayer; little do you remember. [Quran 69:42]
    And indeed, those who disbelieve would almost make you slip with their eyes when they hear the message, and they say, "Indeed, he is mad." [Quran 68:51]
    Imagine all of this being said to a person who is most honorable and honest. The pain these words would have given to our prophet (peace be upon him) can't even be realized. That's why Allah revealed verses to comfort our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him):
    You are not, [O Muhammad], by the favor of your Lord, a madman. And indeed, for you is a reward uninterrupted. And indeed, you are of a great moral character. So you will see and they will see. [Quran 68:2-5]
    Not only that, these people also tortured him physically ( story of Taif and Uhud are well known). The point of mentioning all this is that people who are most beloved to Allah Subhanahu Wa Taala, are test the most. You should be happy that Allah choose to test you. Let the people say and do whatever they want to say. I should not bother you because you are not doing this for them. You are doing this to please Allah Subhanahu Wa Taala and know that Allah is well aware of your struggles and He is also aware of your capabilities. Remember Allah does not burden anyone more than their capacities:
    Allah does not task any soul beyond its capacity [Quran 2: 286]
    We task no soul except according to its capacity [Quran 6 : 152]
    Trust Allah and know that if he is testing you with these trial then know that He loves you and know that He knows that you have the ability to go through these tests.

    Now is it natural to feel sad and anxious about what your community is doing to you? Yes it is.
    Is there a solution to over come this anxiety and sadness. Yes there is.
    Let's go back to Quran again:

    اِنَّ الۡاِنۡسَانَ خُلِقَ هَلُوۡعًا ۙ‏ 
    Verily man is impatient by nature [Quran
    70:19]
    It is man’s natural weakness to be impatient. A better translation could be that man is created anxious (wanting something very much with a feeling of unease) by nature. Here, one should keep in view that at many places in the Quran, after making mention of mankind’s common moral weaknesses, those who believe and adopted righteousness have been made an exception; the same theme is being expressed in the following verses. This by itself explains the truth that these hereditary weaknesses are not unalterable. If man accepts the guidance sent down by God and tries to reform himself practically, he can remove them, and if he gives a free rope to his self, these become ingrained in him deeply.
    Let's see what the nest verses talk about:
    When evil touches him, impatient,
    And when good touches him, withholding [of it],
    Except the observers of prayer -
    Those who are constant in their prayer
    And those within whose wealth is a known right
    For the petitioner and the deprived -
    And those who believe in the Day of Recompense
    And those who are fearful of the punishment of their Lord -
    Indeed, the punishment of their Lord is not that from which one is safe -
    And those who guard their private parts
    Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they are not to be blamed -
    But whoever seeks beyond that, then they are the transgressors -
    And those who are to their trusts and promises attentive
    And those who are in their testimonies upright
    And those who [carefully] maintain their prayer:
    They will be in gardens, honored. [Quran 70:20-35]
    Here Allah Subhanahu Wa Taala has mentioned characteristics of those people who are no impatient or not anxious. These are the people who constantly pray and not only pray but also guard their prayers (pray them in time and with full concentration). These are the people who spend their wealth on poor and needy people because they truly believe in the unseen. They know with certainty that they will meet their Lord after death and they fear Allah's punishment, they know on that day only one who can be their friend and save them is none other than Allah alone. So for that reason, they ask Allah for help in this world and Hereafter, they don't care what people say because they have literally seen the reality of unseen word by believing in it. They guard themselves from doing Haram and following their desires.
    I don't need to explain these verses because they are so explicit in their meaning and anyone who reads them for guidance, can relate to these for solution to their problems.
    Similar message is repeated in Surah Muminoon:
    Certainly will the believers have succeeded:
    They who are during their prayer humbly submissive
    And they who turn away from ill speech
    And they who are observant of zakah
    And they who guard their private parts
    Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed -
    But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors -
    And they who are to their trusts and their promises attentive
    And they who carefully maintain their prayers -
    Those are the inheritors
    Who will inherit al-Firdaus. They will abide therein eternally. [Quran 23:1-11]
    Both these passages from Quran tells us common characteristics of believers and these are the people who will be able to overcome natural weakness of human beings such as being anxious, being sad, being impatience because these things only become part of our character when we have doubts and when faith has not fully entered in our hearts. If we have faith, then Allah is enough for us
    .
    ...And whoever relies upon Allah - then He is sufficient for him...[Quran 65:3]
    By no means, I meant that you have no faith. You are a believer Alhamdulillah but we all need to work hard to firm the roots of our faith. We need to grow our faith from a seedling to a full grow tree whose roots are deeply grounded and grow so much that it starts giving fruit where others can benefit from it. If we remain seedling, then chances are that a strong wind, or flood or any difficult trials can uproot our faith. You are doing great Alhamdulillah, keep doing the good stuff and don't expect reward from people. Expect from the one who is not in need of anyone.
    Ma'aSalaam
    Last edited by 'Abdullah; 03-09-2020 at 04:21 PM.
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