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  1. #1
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    Unhappy with a marriage proposal! (OP)


    Aoa. I received a marriage proposal. My parents loved it. I don't. Apart from not being financially stable, the guy does not even have a job but due to my age and my parent's age, they are pressuring me into saying yes. I have no other way out. Please pray that i get what i want. It is a humble request. Please .i dont want this, but i cant say no.

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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

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    Oh, also....your father have no right to kick you out because you don't want to get married. IT IS HIS DUTY TO WORK FOR YOU and provide for you and PROTECT YOU and make sure you have a comfortable home and life.
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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

    format_quote Originally Posted by xboxisdead View Post
    I understand where you are coming from. Your rights are not protected. Your parents don't respect you as a person, your father is exhausted from being a dad, and they are forcing you to get married to a man you don't want or love and he is not even a religious man and in addition to that you may fear he is lazy and will force you to work while he stays home and do nothing.

    It is already being cleared sister that your parents have obsoletely no right to force you to marriage.
    Yes. But i have accepted my fate. No matter how much u plan, or pray, or make effort. Fate is inevitable...
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  5. #23
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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

    Asalamu alaykum sis,

    I hope this finds you in the best of iman and health.

    I would say praying to Allah swt and ask Allah for best way out. Also please remember to remind respectful to your parents. I know it easy said then done but think about it. Maybe this is your test. Maybe Allah swt is testing you with this to see how your deal with it. Am not saying agree with your father but put trust in Allah swt.

    May I ask? Do you pray your 5 daily salat?

    How is your relationship with Allah swt?


    Allah swt says in Surah Al Baqarah

    وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُم بِشَىْءٍ مِّنَ ٱلْخَوْفِ وَٱلْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ ٱلْأَمْوَٰلِ وَٱلْأَنفُسِ وَٱلثَّمَرَٰتِ ۗ وَبَشِّرِ ٱلصَّٰبِرِينَ


    155. Walanabluwannakum bishayin mina alkhawfi waaljooAAi wanaqsin mina alamwali waalanfusi waalththamarati wabashshiri alssabireena

    Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere,

    ٱلَّذِينَ إِذَآ أَصَٰبَتْهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالُوٓا۟ إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّآ إِلَيْهِ رَٰجِعُونَ
    156. Allatheena itha asabathum museebatun qaloo inna lillahi wainna ilayhi rajiAAoona

    Who say, when afflicted with calamity: "To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return":-
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  6. #24
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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Amatullah_M View Post
    Asalamu alaykum sis,

    I hope this finds you in the best of iman and health.

    I would say praying to Allah swt and ask Allah for best way out. Also please remember to remind respectful to your parents. I know it easy said then done but think about it. Maybe this is your test. Maybe Allah swt is testing you with this to see how your deal with it. Am not saying agree with your father but put trust in Allah swt.

    May I ask? Do you pray your 5 daily salat?

    How is your relationship with Allah swt?


    Allah swt says in Surah Al Baqarah

    وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُم بِشَىْءٍ مِّنَ ٱلْخَوْفِ وَٱلْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ ٱلْأَمْوَٰلِ وَٱلْأَنفُسِ وَٱلثَّمَرَٰتِ ۗ وَبَشِّرِ ٱلصَّٰبِرِينَ


    155. Walanabluwannakum bishayin mina alkhawfi waaljooAAi wanaqsin mina alamwali waalanfusi waalththamarati wabashshiri alssabireena

    Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere,

    ٱلَّذِينَ إِذَآ أَصَٰبَتْهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالُوٓا۟ إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّآ إِلَيْهِ رَٰجِعُونَ
    156. Allatheena itha asabathum museebatun qaloo inna lillahi wainna ilayhi rajiAAoona

    Who say, when afflicted with calamity: "To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return":-
    Aoa.what should i ddo? Do i keep doing dua to Allah? Or should i just accept my fate?
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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

    format_quote Originally Posted by iammuslim98 View Post
    Aoa.what should i ddo? Do i keep doing dua to Allah? Or should i just accept my fate?

    Asalamu alaykum sis,

    Please try to do this as much as you can and I ask Allah swt to make it easy for you.

    1 Make your daily salah.

    2 make time to read the Quran If it’s not a part of your daily routine, begin with only a few minutes a day. Start small and then gradually increase. It won’t seem so dramatic and feel burdensome that way. Time will in shaa Allah expand for you eventually. The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Such a person (who) recites the Qur’an and masters it by heart, will be with the noble righteous scribes (in Heaven). And such a person (who) exerts himself to learn the Qur’an by heart, and recites it with great difficulty, will have a double reward.” [Bukhari]

    3 evening and morning duas.
    Allah also says

    {يا أيها الذين آمنوا اذكروا الله ذكرا كثيرا وسبحوه بكرة وأصيلا}

    (Believers, remember Allah a great deal, and glorify Him morning and evening) [4].


    ( you should engage in verbal utterances of Dhikr. Whenever you are free, for example, in the car, cooking, doing chores, you can gain reward by saying Dhikr like “Subhan Allah” and “Alhamdu lillah”.

    4 Use kind words with your parents. ( وَوَصَّيْنَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُۥ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ فِى عَامَيْنِ أَنِ ٱشْكُرْ لِى وَلِوَٰلِدَيْكَ إِلَىَّ ٱلْمَصِيرُ) 13:14 14. And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.

    Prophet Muhammad reinforced the duty to be kind to parents. A companion of the Prophet once asked him which of the many good deeds a man can do is the most loved by God. Prophet Muhammad answered him by saying, “To offer the prayer in its proper time”. The companion then asked, “And what is next?” to which Prophet Muhammad replied, “To be good and dutiful to your parents…”[1]. The responsibility to be kind and good to parents comes right after the greatest duty in Islam, the prayer.

    Every night before you go to sleep forgive everyone who has ever wronged
    You knownly or unknowingly.

    Allah said:

    خُذِ الْعَفْوَ وَأْمُرْ بِالْعُرْفِ وَأَعْرِضْ عَنِ الْجَاهِلِينَ

    Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant.

    Surat Al-A’raf 7:199

    And Allah said:

    وَإِنَّ السَّاعَةَ لَآتِيَةٌ ۖ فَاصْفَحِ الصَّفْحَ الْجَمِيلَ

    Verily, the Hour is coming, so forgive them with gracious forgiveness.

    SuratAl-Hijr 15:85
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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

    format_quote Originally Posted by Amatullah_M View Post
    Asalamu alaykum sis,

    Please try to do this as much as you can and I ask Allah swt to make it easy for you.

    1 Make your daily salah.

    2 make time to read the Quran If it’s not a part of your daily routine, begin with only a few minutes a day. Start small and then gradually increase. It won’t seem so dramatic and feel burdensome that way. Time will in shaa Allah expand for you eventually. The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Such a person (who) recites the Qur’an and masters it by heart, will be with the noble righteous scribes (in Heaven). And such a person (who) exerts himself to learn the Qur’an by heart, and recites it with great difficulty, will have a double reward.” [Bukhari]

    3 evening and morning duas.
    Allah also says

    {يا أيها الذين آمنوا اذكروا الله ذكرا كثيرا وسبحوه بكرة وأصيلا}

    (Believers, remember Allah a great deal, and glorify Him morning and evening) [4].


    ( you should engage in verbal utterances of Dhikr. Whenever you are free, for example, in the car, cooking, doing chores, you can gain reward by saying Dhikr like “Subhan Allah” and “Alhamdu lillah”.

    4 Use kind words with your parents. ( وَوَصَّيْنَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُۥ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ فِى عَامَيْنِ أَنِ ٱشْكُرْ لِى وَلِوَٰلِدَيْكَ إِلَىَّ ٱلْمَصِيرُ) 13:14 14. And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.

    Prophet Muhammad reinforced the duty to be kind to parents. A companion of the Prophet once asked him which of the many good deeds a man can do is the most loved by God. Prophet Muhammad answered him by saying, “To offer the prayer in its proper time”. The companion then asked, “And what is next?” to which Prophet Muhammad replied, “To be good and dutiful to your parents…”[1]. The responsibility to be kind and good to parents comes right after the greatest duty in Islam, the prayer.

    Every night before you go to sleep forgive everyone who has ever wronged
    You knownly or unknowingly.

    Allah said:

    خُذِ الْعَفْوَ وَأْمُرْ بِالْعُرْفِ وَأَعْرِضْ عَنِ الْجَاهِلِينَ

    Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant.

    Surat Al-A’raf 7:199

    And Allah said:

    وَإِنَّ السَّاعَةَ لَآتِيَةٌ ۖ فَاصْفَحِ الصَّفْحَ الْجَمِيلَ

    Verily, the Hour is coming, so forgive them with gracious forgiveness.

    SuratAl-Hijr 15:85
    AOA. thank you...i am doing dua continuously
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    Re: Unhappy with a marriage proposal!

    format_quote Originally Posted by iammuslim98 View Post
    AOA. thank you...i am doing dua continuously
    Keep going and make lots of dua at tahajjud this ramadan and hope the best from Allah. May Allah make you steadfast on islam. Ameen.

    السلام عليكم ورحمةالله وبركاته
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