Coping with Depression, stress and anger

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Re: Depressed because of sisters!

Asalaamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa BAraakatu,
Today saying " I love you for the sake of Allah" does not come as easy as it has before...I dont think I have ever heard anyone in my masjid tell someone " I love you for the sake of Allah". And truthfully if I were told Jazaak Allah or Jazaak Allahu Khair it would not be enough because sometimes it takes a long time in deciding if you will say it or not out of fear of the persons reaction...Sometimes Jazaak Allahu Khair is good enough and sometimes it isnt especially when someone is looking for a certain response....If you salaamed someone and they said Wa Alaikum, would that be good enough? or if they simply said hello would that be good enough? not really because what you expected was a Wa Alaikum Asalaam or Wa Alaikum Asalaamu Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Baraakatu.....To someone who is not shy mayb that is not an issue....But to someone who is infact shy and does not have many friends...And my dear sisters and brothers there is a difference in having friends and knowing sisters...Knowing a sister is saying salaam calling each other once in a while and so on but to have a true friend is completly different there is more time spent "secrets, goals, aspirations" and things that might not be otherwised shared will be shared among friends....Back to the point for someone who is shy to tell someone you love them for the sake of Allah and have the correct response it is like a feeling of acceptance if that is a correct way to say it...But to not have the correct response can make the person ask themself is there is something wrong with them as a person or a muslim...or if they are not good enough...As brothers and sisters in Islam we should be aware of what we say inshaAllah as it can truly hurt someones feelings and you might not even know it has..And understand it is not what you say its how you say it!..and that can also cause an ill feeling in the heart even if only for a second...Allahu Alim....May Allah swt help us all Ameen!!!
 
Re: unappreciated

DaNgErOuS MiNdS said:
Dont worry you will always be apreciated, u might not know it but you will know one day.
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Allah will reward us for the things we do for ppl

But i guess its hard to c that our efforts dont mean anything to the person itself!
 
Re: unappreciated

:sl:
You shouldn't care what other people think about you - it leads to depression. Instead, work to please Allah for it is He alone that will send you to Heaven or Hell.

It's hard to accept it, but sometimes you do get people who don't appreciate you. I say stuff em and carry on living your life: if people don't appreciate what you do, it's their problem, not yours. Hold your head up high and remain faithfull to Allah.
 
Re: unappreciated

The Prophet said, "The (reward of) deeds depend on intentions, and every person will get the reward according to what he intends. So, whoever migrated for Allah and His Apostle, then his migration will be for Allah and His Apostle, and whoever migrated for worldly benefits or for marrying a woman, then his migration will be for what he migrated for."

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 3.706 Narrated byUmar bin Al Khattab


So my bro never look for the reward of the dunya

but look for the pleasure of Allah

Whenever you do good to whomever you do it to insha'Allah
 
Re: unappreciated

Salaam
Whenever u do something for someone u must keep in ur heart tht ur doing this for Allah! So u want the reward only from Allah! Dont worry, There will come a day when all your good deeds would be rewarded if u r a perfect muslim!

w, salaam
 
Re: unappreciated

If you do something for reward from Allah it is an ibadah of a trader. If you do something just to please Allah that is Ikhlas, just for Him not for the reward He is offering

Rabiatul Adawiyah says she will accept if Allah put her in hell as long as Allah still loves her
 
Re: unappreciated

Salaam.

Well sometimes people may find it hard to express their appreciation for you which is why it'll be hard to know whether they appreciate the things you do for them.
 
Re: unappreciated

anonymous said:
why is it that you do so much for ppl but they just dont appreciate you?
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:sl:

Like Z said, some ppl may not express their appreciation as you would like them to.

You might be expecting something in return, and not getting it makes you feel unappreciated.

You might be going out of your way to please people and compared to your efforts their thanks may seem less to you. So do everything in moderation.

Finally when you do something for the sake of Allah. That's it. Don't expect anything from anyone and you won't be disappointed. No one can reward you like Allah will anyway. InshaAllah.

:w:
 
Re: unappreciated

Finally when you do something for the sake of Allah. That's it. Don't expect anything from anyone and you won't be disappointed. No one can reward you like Allah will anyway. InshaAllah.
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Yeah thats true!!!
 
Re: Depressed because of sisters!

akulion said:
i know the feeling sis...everytime i say to a sis i love u ...i get a slap...

lol

(joking - just to bring some laughter to u insha'Allah and cheer u up)
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:sl: brother and sisters.

LOL, that was sooo funny... then your story... I almost couldn't stop laughing!! :giggling: Thank you for sharing that awesome expirience with us, brother! :giggling:

And sister Ms.Amira, don't be sad, there are many sisters out here that love you for the sake of Allah, myself included. :love:

:thankyou: JazakAllah for loving me for the sake of Allah, I love you too for the sake of Allah. May He have mercy on you and make your life easy. :)

Ma salama.
 
Re: Depressed because of sisters!

:sl:

well, actually when someone says 'I love you for the sake of Allah subhana wa ta'la' the answer should be; 'Ahabbakal ladhie ahbabtanie lahou' which means; 'May He that makes you love me; love you'.
:w:
 
Re: unappreciated

u knw i think we should leave em cuz god knwz wot we done for em

am i ryt or not?
 
Re: Depressed because of sisters!

:sl:

Really? I've learned a new thing now!!
Thank you for telling me!! :thankyou:

Now I will say it right: Ahabbakal ladhie ahbabtanie lahou.
Huh, hard for someone who doesn't speak arabic... But I'll learn it, inshallah.

:w:
 
Re: unappreciated

arehat said:
what do u mean leave them?

Its realy hard when your realy care about them.
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:sl:
A person can aim, but will never be able to please everyone all the time. You give an inch and they want a mile. So keep everything in life to limits and you'll find you're less disappointed.

This quote sums it all up for me:
"He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away." - Raymond Hull

:w:
 
Re: unappreciated

anonymous said:
why is it that you do so much for ppl but they just dont appreciate you?
Click to expand...

Maybe they do, but they don't have the skills to communicate that appreciation to you.

Maybe you are a kind of person who want verbal acknowledgement, that's fine. That's unique to you.

If you are working in a company, try to verbally appreciate someone else's work by verbally appreciating them.

Verbal communication is a learned trait. No one is born to communicate effectively. Sometimes, we just need to gather enough courage to say it, even though the other party does not reciprocate.

Try learning these phrases and use them.

(1) I really like the way you...
(2) I believe you did a great job on....
(3) Thank you so much for your help, I don't know how I'd do it without your help..
(4) I don't know how you do it, you seem to know when I needed help the most, thanks.
(5) JazakAllahu khairan, may Allah find this deed of yours on the day of judgment and reward you tremendously
(6) I'm so glad that we are working together. It really makes a difference

You see, positive communication is contagious. It creates positive vibe among us.

Usually, due to cultural dogma, effective communication is hindered by shyness and maybe the lack of know how.

For people to appreciate you, you need to start with your appreciating others. I know that you're doing that already, be patient and insha Allah, your kindness and thoughtfulness will be reciprocated.

If not by your colleagues, friends or family, most definitely by the One who has inspired that kindness in your soul. :)
 

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