Alright, I sorta wrote this a long time ago...and was VERY hesitant about posting it, but I guess it distroys the whole purpose of writing it: to share it with all of you! Well, I've been here long enough to know many of the EXTRAORDINARY members that make LI unique and special Mashallah, including the nonmuslims who have had to deal with our craziness..
Anyways I wrote this on my free time *during class when it got soo boring*, and it's a bit outdated, but those of you who have been here for a few months, should know what is going on Inshallah..Alright, Imma shut up now and let you all read..
Characters in this Scene (so the newbies don't get lost):
Ofcoarse the Golden Title is given to the
Head Administrator of LI:
Kadafi : Creator of LI (Barak Allahu Feek!)
Administrators of LI (shades included ofcoarse):
Ansar: One of LI’s top refuter Khaldun : The “Quiet” Mod, expresses himself with a raise of an eyebrow…amazing hafidh mashallah, also helped with the creation of LI
The SuperMods also referred to as
SM's of LI:
Far7an: Most sarcastic, and top SM at LI zAk: Who doesn’t know him! Muhammed: One of the more knowledgeable brothers…closes threads in peace Ra'eesah:Mashallah, Very knowledgable, an amazing mod mashallah, but no longer with us *sigh*
Brownies a.k.a "the kids", but formally known as the
Moderators of LI:
Mamsoo- Is now known and referred to as Labiba..(sorry gal, mamsoo will always be stuck with me) Ahmed-LI’sHalo addict! Halima- LI’s Fatwa distributer Rabi'ya- The "Quiet" sister mod Fi- Very knowledgeable bro, mini version of Ansar, always has ahadith at the tip of his fingertips!
Full Members (majority of LI, we rule! 'cept when we get warnings :X) czgibson- LI's nonmuslim refuter, english teacher, and excellent character *if you read this thread, please ignore the spelling and grammar mistakes..*
*disclaimer: characters based on real people, and real life events **THIS WAS NOT WRITTEN TO OFFEND ANYONE!! IF MODS FEEL THAT IT IS SOMEWHAT OFFENDING OR PROVIDES A NEGATIVE ENVIRONMENT FOR LI, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO DELETE WITHOUT CONSENT**
Part - I
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Main Room Everyone is sitting on a nice recliner chair sipping on their favorite drink, except the mods who sat at the trainee table (excluding mamsoo, cuz shes not a kid ) Mamsoo and Ra'eesah are discussing social frailities in ths world, while the brother SMs (supermods) are discussing the destruction of the marriage section.
zAk: it must go, too many kids
Far7an: I agree, there topics are childish
zAk: v must talk to kadafi about it
Muhammed: But, ppl would lose their (moderating) jobs
zAk: hmmmmmmm
far7an: well we can assign them to another section
zAk: ah
Muhammed: what about those that need real advice?
zAk: v have the counselling section
far7an: when will Kada---
All of a sudden Kadafi comes in with Ansar and khaldun behind him, both wearing shades.
Kadafi looks around then signals with his hand the SMs to the 'back office'
zAk and far7an slowly walk behind them whispering to eachother.
zAk: what's with ansar and khaldun wearing the shades? *raises eyebrow SS style*
far7an: Authority
zAk: ah.
Muhammed: I thought it was cuz its sunny today :confused:
All of them shrug and walk into the office.
BACK INTO THE MAIN ROOM
some gossip was going on between the "kids" about why the SM's were called back
Ahmad: I heard they were going to add another section
Mamsoo: I heard they were going to let someone go *shocked*
Fi: well whatever it is we shouldn't be talking about it, lets be patient and ask them when they return inshallah *insert hadith here*
Halima: I agree
All sit there in a moment of silence
Ahmad: So, anyone up for pizza?
Fi: We're on a budget *sigh*
Ahmad: Anyone willing to donate :brother:
Mamsoo: Ok, Ok, I'll pay for the pizza this time
Halima: no no no dont pay for all of it, ill pay half
Rabiya: ok, lets all pitch in
Mamsoo: nonsense! I said i was going to pay for it
Halima: I said i was gonna pay half, rabiya dont worry bout it
Rabiya: well i wont eat if im not even gonna pitch in my part.
Mamsoo: ok that's enough, i said i was paying, so I'm paying, alright?
Halima: Well ok whatever, when the pizza man comes, I'll just pay half
Sisters continue to bicker over the pizza
Fi and Ahmad look at each other
Ahmad: We're never gonna get our pizza, are we...
Fi: not unless u start bringing in your own money
INSIDE THE BACK OFFICE
kadafi: so what is all this about?
Ansar: I was refuting czgibson...Inshallah this wont take long *ahem*
SuperMods get a bit nervous
Ra'essah: I have no clue whats going on, so dont ask me.
Far7an: well, zAk and i were discussing how it might be gud to close the marriage section for a bit.
zAk: more like forever.
Ansar: *sigh*
Khaldun: ah, let the kids have their fun
Kadafi: and how will the closure of this section help or benefit the forum?
zAk: *cough* *looks at farhan*
far7an looks back at zAk signaling him to say something. Kadafi raises his eyebrow, waiting patiently for a reply.
zAk: vell how does it help the forum if v dont close it? :brother:
Far7an: *looks at zAk because of his response* well, the topics are getting useless and there is no benefit to them. If a member wants real help, they can look at past threads or use the counseling section.
TO BE CONTINUED . . . . . (don't worry, more members have already been added to the next scenes..just be patient Inshallah)
Full Members (majority of LI, we rule! 'cept when we get warnings :X )
Akulion: LI's psychololgist
Sonz: LI's world affairs newscaster
Iqram/Anonymous member: still eager to become mod
Miscellaneous Members (People/things that are a part of LI indirectly)
Mr.Bear: Almost as popular as zAK, but not quite. Most of LI has had a beautiful, memorable chat with this fuzzy fella.
Tall Niqabi- Allahu A'lem who she is.
Nonmuslim: Does not represent the majority of the nonmuslims here, but a version of previous nonmuslims that have visited the site.
Part VI
Back in the Mod Room
Mods are watching the World Affairs Channel, stunned at the live news coverage going on.
On TV
Sonz: We are here live at LI® co. where nonmuslims are causing havoc in the forums.
Nonmuslim: I’ll destroy you all..you’ll never see spamming as you’ve seen in this form before! Muwahahahaha
Ansar: If you don’t behave, you’ll force me to refute you and win.
Sonz: We will interview a young member who will remain anonymous in this filming. Tell us what happened young man.
Anonymous member: Well, I was browsing through the forum..and then I seen— wait, my voice is changed, right??
Sonz: yes, please continue.
Anonymous Member: Is it a manly voice?
Sonz: If you want it to be, plz go on.
Anonymous member: well I decided I wanted to view the “fantasy and dreams” thread in the general’s section.. *cries* and…Oh! My virgin eyes!
Sonz: *tries to sympathize*
Anonymous member: *bursts* never have I seen such filth in my life! I reported the horrific thread right away, but even though, I felt powerless in the hands of this kafir. I felt insecure that other members may have been the victims of such bloody and dirty people.
Alpha dude: Hey look, Iqram’s on TV!
Iqram: You will delete that bit right?
Sonz: Well…this is live lad.
Iqram: Oh the shameee :yawn: Curse you porn poster..Curse you!! I blame zAk for this! He wouldn’t let me be a mod. I would’ve been a great mod. I could’ve saved my self and other innocent civilians.
Sonz: righhht…*signals the cameras to change position*
Farhan and Khaldun are in the background carrying out a spammer. Sonz moves in for extra coverage
Sonz: Farhan, do you have any comments about the future of LI and how it will be protected from future spammers?
Farhan: No comments, I’m busy.
Sonz: Khaldun?
Khaldun: Sorry ekhi, this isn’t the time.
Nonmuslim: I will come back!! You can’t get rid of me this fast!!
Farhan: *carrying nonmuslim out with khaldun* Mashallah, he’s heavy..I think we’re going to need another mod for help.
Khaldun: *struggling* Allahu Akbar, this brother doesn’t hold back!
*cameras return focus on sonz*
Sonz: We will try to contact one of the superiors inshallah. We have zAk on the line.
zAk: Assalamu Alaykum
Sonz: Walaikum asalaam, zAk can you plz tell us what is really happening?
zAk: v are taking care of it as v speak. No one should worry.
Sonz: How did you find out about the dirty posts and spamming?
zAk: vell, v have the state of the art technology, sonz. We are emailed right away when such things happen.
Sonz: What will happen to the so called “Terrorists of LI?”
zAk: v will ban them from the company, and they will not be able to enter even if they tried. v have the best administrators who check proper identification and history of each new person that tries to enter.
Sonz: I see.
zAk: I was just wondering..When will the live coverage about Imams of the haramains be?
Sonz: *cuts off* Do you want to become a mod? Stay tuned, we will take a break from this tragic story and now bring to you to the supporters LI® productions.
-----------------------
1st Commercial:
Muezzin: Do you need a new watch?
Minaz: How about a break from your boring life?
Muezzin: Maybe some chocolates to ease your moodswings, sisters
Minaz: If you have answered yes to most one or more of these questions, then you should visit our shop, "Masters of Might, Magic and Monday mornings", in LI’s halal fun section.
Muezzin: If you have answered no to all of these questions, then we’ll arrange your marriage with the tall niqaabi that beat up Minaz, in which case, you will be forced to answer yes to all these questions.
*halal theme song*
End Commercial
--------------------------
2nd Commercial
Minaz: Are you depressed?
Muezzin: Are you broke and can’t afford a shrink?
Minaz: Then call the offices of Dr. Aku..He will surely help you as he’s helped us!
Muezzin: Yup, minaz is a living patient! Amazing! So call now for your free appointment and a live chat between yourself and a bear!
Minaz: you heard right, a BEAR.
Muezzin: *fake chuckles* Here’s a real clip from the office of Doc Aku
Clip
Minaz: I love you Mr. Bear
Mr.Bear: I love you too.
Minaz: Thank you for making me happy, Muezzin and I will never argue again
Mr.Bear: Muezzin is not in my A.L.--*clip is interrupted*
End Clip
Muezzin: We will also introduce you to Dr. Aku himself. So come and take a short walk with me down the hall here.
Minaz: *knocks on door*
Muezzin: *opens door* Assalamu alaikum doc
Akulion: Walaikum Assalam, how may I help you boys..Minaz having troubles again? *hides Mr. Bear under desk*
Minaz:Oh Dr. Aku, you joker
Muezzin: We just came in to ask you a few questions like we previously discussed..
Akulion: Yes, please, go ahead.
Muezzin: Brother, how do you find time to make a website and help your patients.
Akulion: Well you see muezzin, I am devoted to keeping LI a happy environment for all of us, so my patients come first.
Muezzin: see you heard it here first folks, the patients are always first.
Minaz: here’s the number now
Muezzin: *whispers* flip the poster man..
*halal theme song*
End Commercial
-------------------------------
3rd Commercial:
Tall Niqaabi: Have you been bombarded by these two fellows here? *shows pic of Muezzin and Minaz*
Sis: One of them was seen coming out of the psychology headquarters of LI, we believe he is the one by the name of Minaz. The second one who calls himself Muezzin, forced the one by the name of Minaz to sell chocolates to acne prone sisters.
Tall Niqaabi: we are in search for brothers and sisters everywhere to donate a shoe. The shoe will be used for beneficial reasons that cannot be mentioned as of the moment.
Sis: There will be boxes placed in every corner of the LI forum. Please place your shoe in there.
Farhan: Salaam, I am Farhan, and I support this infomercial.
End Commercial
Mamsoo: Astughfirallah, this is disgusting.
Ahmad: Poor Iqram.
Fi: I suppose we have to be extra watchful now.
Kadafi walks into the room.
Kadafi: Well since you all know what’s going on in the forums now, I have decided that we may need a few more watchful eyes to keep the forum safe. These new moderating members were carefully chosen from a selected few. I think their potential is high. You will meet some of them in these next few days inshallah.
Kadafi leaves.
Alpha Dude enters.
Alpha dude: Assalamu Alaikum!
Everyone: Walaikum Assalaam
Mamsoo: oh no, did kadafi leave the mod room unlocked again?
Alpha dude: I’m one of the new mods
Fi: Well, welcome to the mod section ekhi, if you need any help be sure to ask inshallah
Alpha dude: Thanks, Aren’t we supposed to be wearing our Mod uniforms?
Ahmad: yea why?
Alpha dude: Well, why isn’t fi wearing his??
Fi: I like change sometimes
Alpha dude: I don’t think Kadafi would like it if you didn’t wear it, I mean how are new members supposed to differentiate between mods and members?
Fi bans Alpha dude, in which zAk has to come to the rescue to unban him.
On TV
Sonz: We are live again to bring you an update on what’s occurring here in LI this very moment. We are going to go into the interrogation room and see what is to be of the terrorist. Please, bear in mind that these events may be gruesome to some viewers,
The Interrogation Room (located behind the ‘Back Room’)
*cameras focus upon the Nonmuslim*
Nonmuslim: What’s the most you’re going to get out of me through your so called interrogation, ask me about my beliefs!?
Ansar: I’m not here to refute.
Nonmuslim: Afraid to be challenged?
Ansar: Believe me, it was enough of a challenge to carry you in here. Allahu akbar.
Woodrow enters
Woodrow: Assalamu Alaikum ekhi
Ansar: Walaikum asalaam wa rahmatallah
Woodrow: I hope you don’t mind..I just have a question to ask him.
Ansar: No, not at all, whatever will get us to the bottom of this.
Woodrow: *turns to the nonmsulim* I have to know, WHERES THAT DRATTED CLICKING NOISE COMING FROM!?
Ansar:
Nonmuslim: I don’t know what you’re talking about..
Woodrow: *slams random book on table* don’t lie to me! I’ll track it down if it’s one of the last things I do!
Nonmuslim: Jesus! oh: I thought you were one of the calm and collective moderators..
Woodrow: Who can be calm and collective when that clicking—stop changing the subject!
Ansar: Ok, I’ll take it from here ekhi..
Woodrow: Inshallah, by the way..*whispers* Here’s my list of possible suspects, as you can see lol_whats his name should be considered as the second suspect..
Ansar: Alright inshallah
Outside of the interrogation room:
Sonz: As you have just seen, it was getting to a climax in there, subhanallah, so they asked us to leave for our safety.
Alpha Dude: Sonz, can I get interviewed??
Sonz: *walks away slowly* In other news, Eastern Naple is researching on what seems to be a girl emitting glass from her forehead.
Alpha Dude: I know you can hear me!!
Alpha dude is soon banned, and sadly does not get interviewed by sonz. He then tries to create his own reality day time show, but unfortunately it backfires and he finds himself banned 4 other times. One of these times include when he accidentally bans his own self. In other incidents, some Moderators have confessed that they purposely banned him when they felt he was becoming bothersome, others say it was purely for the fun and joy they receive when banning Alpha Dude. Allahu A’lem
fi aman Allah
w'salaam
Last edited by *charisma*; 10-09-2006 at 12:47 PM.
Ansar: No, not at all, whatever will get us to the bottom of this.
Woodrow: *turns to the nonmsulim* I have to know, WHERES THAT DRATTED CLICKING NOISE COMING FROM!?
i love this part
is nice to see this thread is still alive...
25:36 And the true servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk the earth with humility and when the ignorant address them, they respond with words of peace.
subhan Allaah.. i wonda how all this alpha business reached outside the forum. Anyway, this is some really top stuff masha'Allaah. keep it up insha'Allah.
that was awesome i love it when you cut the bros off sis 'wens imam of the haramains on' n he gets cut of ROFL haha, i cant believe i missed alpha getting banned inshaAllah next time *hints umm Abdullah to ban him so i can see*
keep them coming
ma'salamah
سلامة الإنسان في حلاوة اللسان
The safety of a human is in the sweetness of his tongue.
بسم الله الذي لا يضرّ مع اسمه شيءٌ في الأرضِ و لا في السّماءِ و هو السّميعُ العليم
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) Mamsoo and Ra'eesah are discussing social frailities in ths world, while the brother SMs (supermods) are discussing the destruction of the marriage section.
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oh: I thought you were one of the calm and collective moderators.. 
....de first fing am gonna do wen i go hme is read dat 
أم ذي عينين كبيرين 
صفية و عمر 
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