..the thread I know a lot of you have been waiting for.
I almost didn't do it, but I decided to go ahead and take the plunge anyway. So I took my shahada today.
I feel like a big weight has been lifted from my heart. The old order of my life has passed away, and the old life is gone. This is the dawn of a new day for me.
I know it won't all be easy from here, but I feel at peace right now. For the first time in a long time, I feel good about myself.
Today I have to admit that all this talk about wives has me feeling a little lonely. I keep thinking about some of the women from my past and how if things went differently, I could be with them now. Of course, that would present an extra problem now since they most likely would not be Muslim and I'd have to leave them. So I guess it is good that things turned out like they did.
Still though, I'm feeling kind of down today. Tired and lonely...
Well, I got a suggestion that could possibly lift your spirits..... of course it depends on whether you are willing to give it a try.
Ahem! So here's what I believe might help...
DREAMING!!!
Yup! Isn't it a dream come true that you are a Muslim? Alhamdulillah! You were dreaming of achieving peace within your heart. Now you got what you dreamed about.
Next, you have to dream about your future wife.... you have to believe she is out there somewhere and that you will meet her when the time is right. Allah has created her for you and you just need to be patient until He makes a way for you to meet her.
Until then..... dream about her! Hopefully this will end your feeling of loneliness. It will give you a feeling of hope and something to look forward to as well. And meanwhile, you can be preparing yourself to be the best Muslim husband to her. So when you two do get married, you will be ready for the responsibility that comes with marriage.
Remember..... marriage is half your religion.
It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.
Well, I got a suggestion that could possibly lift your spirits..... of course it depends on whether you are willing to give it a try. Ahem! So here's what I believe might help... DREAMING!!! Yup! Isn't it a dream come true that you are a Muslim? Alhamdulillah! You were dreaming of achieving peace within your heart. Now you got what you dreamed about. Next, you have to dream about your future wife.... you have to believe she is out there somewhere and that you will meet her when the time is right. Allah has created her for you and you just need to be patient until He makes a way for you to meet her. Until then..... dream about her! Hopefully this will end your feeling of loneliness. It will give you a feeling of hope and something to look forward to as well. And meanwhile, you can be preparing yourself to be the best Muslim husband to her. So when you two do get married, you will be ready for the responsibility that comes with marriage. Remember..... marriage is half your religion.
I know I'm not ready to be a husband yet. There is much I have yet to learn about being a good Muslim man before I can think about being a husband. But sometimes I get lonely. It's human nature after all. I'm 35 years old and most of my friends (both Muslim and not) are married now, so naturally, I want to know what it's like to have someone to love and that loves me. I don't want to rush into things, especially not now. There are too many other issues that I must deal with before I can think about taking a wife and being a good husband.
I don't know how long it will be before I can tell my parents that I am a Muslim now. It might be weeks, maybe months, maybe years. Only Allah knows, and I have to trust that He will tell me when the time is right. Right now I am more concerned with becoming a better man and improving my relationship with Allah. That has to be my first priority.
I might be down, but I'm not out yet. I think it's my lack of sleep and lack of caffeine talking more than anything. I picked a bad time to cut down on caffeine. This too shall pass, inshallah.
running outside helps; take like 5-10 minutes to run or however long you want to, its supposed to make you feel better and allow your thoughts to run smoothly in your mind; it relieves stress as well. Prayer + Your Effort to fix a problem or Achieve a Goal = Success, right? Yes the prayers you make will definitely help you whenever Allah decides to accept them; and if he sees his slave putting more effort with the intention to please his Lord, Allah has to help him sooner or later, no? =) Just got 2 wait it out like everyone else. I hope this helps. May Allah grant us All the highest level of Paradise.
running outside helps; take like 5-10 minutes to run or however long you want to, its supposed to make you feel better and allow your thoughts to run smoothly in your mind; it relieves stress as well. Prayer + Your Effort to fix a problem or Achieve a Goal = Success, right? Yes the prayers you make will definitely help you whenever Allah decides to accept them; and if he sees his slave putting more effort with the intention to please his Lord, Allah has to help him sooner or later, no? =) Just got 2 wait it out like everyone else. I hope this helps. May Allah grant us All the highest level of Paradise.
Well, a brother at the masjid told me something very interesting the other day. Those times when it seems like Allah doesn't hear us, it's because He likes to hear our words of praise and worship. The more faith we have in the hard times, the more reward we will get in the end, inshallah.
This is not an easy time for me, but I must not lose focus. I must keep my faith. All too often in my life, I get frustrated and I give up. I must not do that here. I will not do that here.
Brother, congratulations!!!
Enjoy the big step that you have taken. You are wise to want to take your time and sort things out. You seem like a great son and it is evident that you want to please your parents. I admire the fact that you want to present an improved version of yourself instead of just a new title to them. So, no rush.
And, in time your "Lonely" sign will changed when you find and accept the peace within, inshallah.
And, in time your "Lonely" sign will changed when you find and accept the peace within, inshallah.
lol. I've tried to change that "Lonely" sign. I even wrote Part IX of my story... with the remote hope that perhaps that sign will change.... to one of "Goofy".
No luck.
It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.
Brother, congratulations!!! Enjoy the big step that you have taken. You are wise to want to take your time and sort things out. You seem like a great son and it is evident that you want to please your parents. I admire the fact that you want to present an improved version of yourself instead of just a new title to them. So, no rush. And, in time your "Lonely" sign will changed when you find and accept the peace within, inshallah.
format_quote Originally Posted by Flame
lol. I've tried to change that "Lonely" sign. I even wrote Part IX of my story... with the remote hope that perhaps that sign will change.... to one of "Goofy". No luck.
Well it's a new day now, and a new sign. Some prayer and a good night's sleep and I feel a lot better than I did yesterday, mashallah.
My daily prayer is that Allah will guide me and make me into the man I should be, so that I can show the world that I am a better person. Also that He will open the hearts and minds of my friends and family so that they will at least respect my decision, if not accept it.
I know I'm so late to this. So many things are going on and I didn't even know!
Anyways, I'm glad for you. Alhamdulillah, Allah has guided you, may He also guide your family. May He give you success in this life and in the hereafter.
inshaallah, He will make everything easy for you.
Also that He will open the hearts and minds of my friends and family so that they will at least respect my decision
I used those exact words in my last duaa. I said, "Open the hearts and minds of my friends and family to show them that Islam is the truth." You brothers and sisters are all more eloquent than me, so I steal your words often
I used those exact words in my last duaa. I said, "Open the hearts and minds of my friends and family to show them that Islam is the truth." You brothers and sisters are all more eloquent than me, so I steal your words often
Well I'm not the most eloquent man around either, but that is my daily prayer, at every prayer I make, whether voluntary or mandatory. I don't know how long it will take, but one day I hope to be able to tell my family about Islam and have them at least listen to and respect my decision. It might take months, or even years, before they are ready to listen, but Allah will show me when the time is right.
Well patience is one thing I am trying to work on. Allah knows that I've not been patient throughout most of my life. I guess this is as good a time any to start...
Well patience is one thing I am trying to work on. Allah knows that I've not been patient throughout most of my life. I guess this is as good a time any to start...
for a new Muslim, this is an awesome Hadeeth to ponder over:
On the authority of Ibn Abbas that the messenger of Allah, among the sayings he relates from his Lord is :
p "Allah has written down the good deeds and the bad ones." Then he explained it [by saying that] :" He who has intended a good deed and has not done it, Allah writes it down with Himself as a full good deed, but if he has intended it and has done it, Allah writes it down with Himself as from ten good deeds to seven hundred times, or many times over. But if he has intended a bad deed and has not done it, Allah writes it down with Himself as a full good deed, but if he has intended it and has done it, Allah writes it down as one bad deed."
p related by Bukhari and Muslim in their two salihs
keep this in your mind.
wa Salaam
Had the non-believer known of all the Mercy which is in the Hands of Allah, he would not lose hope of entering Paradise, and had the believer known of all the punishment which is present with Allah, he would not consider himself safe from the Hell-Fire http://www.muftimenk.co.za/Downloads.html
Thanks, YusufNoor. I am really struggling with overcoming my old habits and my old lifestyle as I make my way down the straight path. These last couple of days have been really trying for me. Shaytan is putting doubts in my mind as to whether I'm doing the right thing, making me feel alone and like I'll never be able to accomplish what I want to do.
I still think I am on the right path, and I must not turn from that...
Shaytan is putting doubts in my mind as to whether I'm doing the right thing, making me feel alone and like I'll never be able to accomplish what I want to do.
Did someone mention Shaytan? lol.
Looks like you are giving Shaytan a lot of work to do, Just a Guy. Why don't you indulge in a bit of delight and happiness that you are making him work so hard.
A good thing to do would be to ROLL UP YOUR SLEEVES. And keep them rolled up. This is a battle you're going to fight with Shaytan till the day of your death.
Come on, do it. Ah! You'll feel better. I think. Give it a try. Roll up your sleeves and tell Shaytan you're ready to handle anything he hurls at you..... especially trying to mislead you away from The Straight Path.
It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.
Reminder...... remember how you defeated Shaytan when you didn't listen to him and went ahead to the masjid to say the shahada? You clobbered him good and I hope you felt satisfaction in that clobbering. lol. Now.... you have to keep clobbering him on a daily basis. Or else he will pull you down and make you feel miserable. Don't let him win, Just a Guy. You've proven that you have the strength to fight him.
It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.
Yeah, I needed to hear that just now, Flame. Today was a rough day for me. Shaytan was all in my face, telling me I'm never going to figure this out, and I'm lonely, and will always be alone. Should I find a wife, what about my dogs, when do I tell my parents, etc. All of these thoughts and more kept going through my head all day.
I had to lie to my mother today, and Shaytan made me feel really guilty about that. She called to talk about Father's Day this weekend, and asked me if I was going to church. I told her I was still thinking about it and hadn't found a church yet. I couldn't very well tell her over the phone that I'm a Muslim now. I can't ruin Father's Day by telling him that his only son is a Muslim. I just can't.
I'm really struggling today, but I have to rely on my prayers to get me through. I am alone in this fight, but at least I have Allah to talk to.
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