I didnt know Muhammad was a Muslim name!!

[Rabi'ya]

I was having a conversation with my mum about names recently. someone came onto the news I forgot who it was now, but their first name was Muhammad "something". I sed to my mum, something about him being Muslim and my mum goes " i never knew Muhammad was a Muslim name, i just associated it with foreigners"

I didnt quite know what to say. I explained that our prophet is Muhammad and thats why a lot of Muslim guys have that name. she sed that she never associated it with any religion...just the fact that non-british people generally tend to have that name.

We were looking at some pictures of my husband and she goes"im sure hed look much better without a beard" i showed her a pic of before he had a beard and she goes "see, hes soo good looking" i just tried to explain the sunnah of beard and the fact that its part of hijab for a guy amongst other things. then she goes "so basically ur protective over him" i was like "hell yeh!! hes my hubby!!" its a similar reason to why i wear a scarf - was i wrong to go down this route of explaination i duno im confused.

I sudednly realised, despite how much i try to talk to her about Islam, how little she listens, or uinderstands. She is genuinely not intrested in Islam. I got really hurt thinking that she doesnt wanna take an intrest in my life or what I believe so pationately about. I often talk and try to explain but end up getting shouted down....

sorry this post rambles but i just suddenly realised whats goingon.....



Rabi'ya:rose:

[dishdash]

and the fact that its part of hijab for a guy amongst other things.

What on Earth does that mean?! I do hope you are not trying to say what I think you are saying...

Alhamdulilah. You have a mother that even broaches the subject with you. I know many reverts whose parents won't even let them back in the house.

Be thankful. Don't expect them to absorb in the same way that you have. And tell her that you are thankful for her listening.

[Rabi'ya]

bro

wht do u think i was implying?

I am grateful that she listens(well i hope she does) but its been years now...and still she makes little digs at me. The get upset when i dont laugh at certain jokes, especially ones directly against Islam.

Im jsut wondering whether anyone can suggest an approach forme...coz wht im doing doesnt seem to work and i jsut feel so downhearted afterwards, i feel that altho im trying my best im not achieving anything. Its so upsetting to think that Islam is right on their doorstep but they(mum n brother, n dad) chose to ignore it



Rabi'ya:rose:

[Al-Zaara]

lol Her association that Muhammad is a name only for foreingers and that even non-Muslims can have, isn't that wrong I'd guess. There ARE non-Muslim, let's say, Arabs with the name Muhammad. But dunno if it's common. Maybe she just pushes the fact that almost only Muslim males have the name Muhammad, because she doesn't want to think of Islam (?). As you said, she doesn't seem interested.

Alhamdulillah, you wear the hijab and your husband has a beard. In her eyes, probably everything that isn't Islamic, is much prettier or better.

Also, as brother dishdash said, be thankful she doesn't get a panic attack when you mention Islam or when you show yourself. At least, she doesn't actually attack you, she only being honest and at least she doesn't try too hard to change you.

Only Allah can awaken the imaan in people. Have sabr, you never know what happens tomorrow. Maybe she changes, maybe in some years from now. Insha'Allah. But don't expect that you can guide her, if Allah doesn't will it.

Again, as brother dishdash said, be thankful. And tell her you're thankful. Your love towards her may soften her heart to Islam, if Allah so wills.

[Woodrow]

I sudednly realised, despite how much i try to talk to her about Islam, how little she listens, or uinderstands. She is genuinely not intrested in Islam. I got really hurt thinking that she doesnt wanna take an intrest in my life or what I believe so pationately about. I often talk and try to explain but end up getting shouted down....





Rabi'ya:rose:

Ukthi,

I put what I believe are key words into red. I doubt if words are a very effective tool to convince a person of the Beauty and Truth of Islam, unless the person is showing an interest in Islam.

It is nearly impossible to speak to a person about something they have no interest in. The more persistent we become the more resistant they become. Talk then becomes a very serious barrier for communication.

It is far better to live the life of a Muslim and then use any time interest is shown as an opportunity to explain that ONE issue of interest.

Have patience and allow her time to ask questions. Perhaps she will never ask questions, but the fact you seem to still have a friendly relationship with her, shows that there is a spark glowing. Do not try to throw gasoline on that spark to make a raging fire that becomes uncomfortably hot. Fan it gently and let it give a comforting glow of warmth.

[glo]

Hi Rabi'ya

I think as believers we may have to accept that there ware certain things non-believers will never, in fact can never (!) understand about our faith.

One of the main difficulties for non-believers is possibly to grasp how important our faith and God is to us!
I have been a Christian for 4 years, and my husband really struggles with the idea that to me God comes before him!
And unless one day he submits to God himself, I don't think he will ever come to terms with it!

Be patient and keep praying!

Peace

[Snowflake]

Sometimes when words fail to have the desired affect, actions can make all the difference.

Remember the story of the woman who used to throw rubbish on the Prophet (PBUH)? At the end it was the Prophet's kind actions which lead her to ask the Prophet to teach her his religion.

Carry on treating your mother as Islam teaches us to. Perhaps make the extra effort and tell her it is your duty as a muslim to do that. She may never revert, but hopefully she will stop objecting to your choice of religion and may even start taking an interest in it.

[Rabi'ya]

wht everyones saying is 100% right...but still i feel a little downhearted

brother Woodrow.....ur a revert right? how do u deal with ur family when ur trying to complete something as a Muslim, but u know that its upsetting ur family. I always heave Allah first in ym heart, but i feel sad whn i know im upsetting my family. ur compeltely right about the one issuea t a time tho. I do try to do that, but often, to explain one thing, u need to explain another

Glo...thanks for the kind words. I guess ur right..my family will not understand until such time as they have a concept of God. an awreness even. right now they are cmopletely ignorant

Muslimah Sis....again, jazakAllah kheir for the reference...indeed i do know tht story and I pray Allah gives me that kind of strength. Its just so upsetting...I guess i need more patience right?


Sorry to put this upon u guys, and jazakAlla kheir for the lovely motivating words. I always find xmas hard, when i spend it with my family. I have to be so careful how i conduct myself, but yet, still need to spend time with my family and extended family at this time of year.



Rabi'ya:rose:

[FollowingAlhuda]

Weird!

[Rabi'ya]

whts wierd?



Rabi'ya:rose:

[lyesh]

salaamz sis,
I know how you'll be feeling. You know what... my whole family is muslim! but non- practicing ones! and they r just the same! they mock at me, even when my lil sis tried to wear hijab they r telling her not to.. What I do is just ignore them. They talk abt me at my back. Dont worry abt it sis!
At last u'll see.... they will come to u! they'll need u! Insha Allah!
And they'll understand u too!
Allah is with us sis!

[AmarFaisal]

I'd like to share a small story of how actions can be more powerful than words. I was attending a small Islamic lecture where the scholar told us abt his experience. Once when he was visiting a bookshop in Kuwait, an Arab woman came upto him and asked him if he could convert his maid to Islam. He asked to meet thee maid. He asked the maid why she wanted to convert to Islam, What did she find so appealing in it . The maid pointed towards the Arab woman and said that it is this lady whose house I work in, and who has appealed me towards entering Islam. She is so nice to me, and treats me very kindly, I have never been treated like this before in my life. She never makes me feel like a slave but like her own daughter. She says this is what Islam teaches u s to do. If Islam is what I see in her I want to convert to Islam so that I may be like her. The Scholar asked her to repeat the Kalimah after him and converted her to Islam. JazakAllah

It is Allah who chooses whomever he wishes to guide. Our Prophet Ibrahim (PBUH) tried all he could to guide his father towards Islam but in vain. May Allah have mercy on us.

[glo]

wht everyones saying is 100% right...but still i feel a little downhearted

brother Woodrow.....ur a revert right? how do u deal with ur family when ur trying to complete something as a Muslim, but u know that its upsetting ur family. I always heave Allah first in ym heart, but i feel sad whn i know im upsetting my family. ur compeltely right about the one issuea t a time tho. I do try to do that, but often, to explain one thing, u need to explain another

Glo...thanks for the kind words. I guess ur right..my family will not understand until such time as they have a concept of God. an awreness even. right now they are cmopletely ignorant

Muslimah Sis....again, jazakAllah kheir for the reference...indeed i do know tht story and I pray Allah gives me that kind of strength. Its just so upsetting...I guess i need more patience right?

Sorry to put this upon u guys, and jazakAlla kheir for the lovely motivating words. I always find xmas hard, when i spend it with my family. I have to be so careful how i conduct myself, but yet, still need to spend time with my family and extended family at this time of year.



Rabi'ya:rose:

Hi Rabi'ya

You might find that all of Woodrow's family are converted too - I seem to remember he was the last one to turn to Islam (but I should let him answer the question himself ...)

I can understand that spending Christmas with your family must be difficult for you - especially with your husband and in-laws being away.
Perhaps it helps to remember that Christmas is ultimately about remembering and honouring Isa (pbuh) ... can you agree with and focus on that?

You are in my thoughts and prayers, sister.
May God give you strength!

[Jayda]

wht everyones saying is 100% right...but still i feel a little downhearted

brother Woodrow.....ur a revert right? how do u deal with ur family when ur trying to complete something as a Muslim, but u know that its upsetting ur family. I always heave Allah first in ym heart, but i feel sad whn i know im upsetting my family. ur compeltely right about the one issuea t a time tho. I do try to do that, but often, to explain one thing, u need to explain another

Glo...thanks for the kind words. I guess ur right..my family will not understand until such time as they have a concept of God. an awreness even. right now they are cmopletely ignorant

Muslimah Sis....again, jazakAllah kheir for the reference...indeed i do know tht story and I pray Allah gives me that kind of strength. Its just so upsetting...I guess i need more patience right?


Sorry to put this upon u guys, and jazakAlla kheir for the lovely motivating words. I always find xmas hard, when i spend it with my family. I have to be so careful how i conduct myself, but yet, still need to spend time with my family and extended family at this time of year.



Rabi'ya:rose:

hola Rabiya

my husband went through a time when he did not believe in anything... i told him about God without saying anything, i just listened... sometimes you have to understand that the people you love need more from you than you need from them... and you cannot expect things from them...

Dios te bendiga

[Woodrow]

Hi Rabi'ya

You might find that all of Woodrow's family are converted too - I seem to remember he was the last one to turn to Islam (but I should let him answer the question himself ...)

I can understand that spending Christmas with your family must be difficult for you - especially with your husband and in-laws being away.
Perhaps it helps to remember that Christmas is ultimately about remembering and honouring Isa (pbuh) ... can you agree with and focus on that?

You are in my thoughts and prayers, sister.
May God give you strength!

You are correct. I was the last one to revert. I never had any pressure from any family members. None of my kids ever spoke to me about Islam unless I brought up the subject, and that was rare. Then again I was always travelling and it was seldom I saw any of my family more then once every 2 or 3 years.