Becoming a humantarian Aid worker.

[geek_pride]

I've recently decided it what I want to become. I'm currently studying and
6th form and hopefully I would get into uni and become an Aid worker. The only problem is I would be away for 1-2 years in developing countries(alone). My dad completely supports me in this career move however my uncle feels it is not unacceptble for me to be galloping around the world. He believes I should be settled down and become a good housewife and mother. What are people opinion on this

[crayon]

I used to (still sort of do) think the exact same way, sister.

But then I really thought about it.. A woman can't travel without a mahram. There are some scholars who say that it's allowed, but think of it this way: this is something you're going to do for your whole life, you'll be constantly traveling, so it's not just a one time thing. If on judgement day it turns out to be indeed haram, wouldn't you rather have been on the safe side and traveled only with a mahram?
Also, there will be loads of interacting with men, which is a definite no no.
I had several other reasons but they've slipped my mind.. If I remember them I'll edit them in later on.

Plus, there are always people who need help, right where you live. You could join organizations and help people while living right where you are.

For me, I've decided the only time I will do this if I marry someone who has the same dream I do, and is willing to do this, together.
If not, then alhamdullilah anyway.
And remeber that whoever leaves something for the sake of Allah, Allah will reward him with something better than it in this life and the next.

[geek_pride]

What about if i dont want to get married. I seriously dont find marriage and child bearing appealing. People have said that this is haraam and i would go to hell but isnt marriage life only preferred in islam? Its not actually forced upon us. Also If i do become an aid worker, wouldnt that fact i'm helping people outweigh being alone, without a husband?

[crayon]

Getting married is not obligatory, but it is preferable. You may not want to get married now, but you could always change your mind? I mean, what you're talking about is a beautiful enriching enlightening experience, but wouldn't it be so much more beautiful if you experienced it with someone? A friend, or a husband, a family member; just anyone to share it with you?

Don't think of marriage as marrying someone ugly and boring your parents set you up with, popping out a kid every year, and cooking and cleaning and catering to your husbands every desire, it is nothing like that. At least, as long as you don't make it anything like that.

And like I said, volunteer work is always needed, all over the world. You could help your community right at home. The result is ultimately the same, helping people. Whether it's sick, starving children in some poor country, or a woman's shelter or orphanage at home, you'd still be doing good.

[geek_pride]

Interraction with the opposite sex is inevitable, especially for people like me who live in non muslim places ( live in london) I've been taught that social interaction between man and women (alone) is haraam and should be avoided however not all interaction between men and women is forbidden. An example of Khadijah, who employed Muhammad (pbuh) and met with him to conduct trade before they were married, and in the example set by the other wives of Muhammad(pbuh), who taught and counseled the men and women of Medina.
Some are interactions neccessory and the interaction i would be doing would be neccessory. But i understand what you are saying, especially about travelling alone and needed a mehram.
I thank you for the advise

[Al-Zaara]

If your father supports you and you research very well on what you will do, where you will be, how long etc. I do not think there's anything that can stop you. I'm actually glad to see someone being interested in it. People don't understand how important that job can be. When there's for example a war and people in the world say something should be done, these aid workes go there and help right in the place. It's a job of great value. MashaAllah.

[geek_pride]

If your father supports you and you research very well on what you will do, where you will be, how long etc. I do not think there's anything that can stop you. I'm actually glad to see someone being interested in it. People don't understand how important that job can be. When there's for example a war and people in the world say something should be done, these aid workes go there and help right in the place. It's a job of great value. MashaAllah.

Thank you so much for those supportive words. Yes my father supports me, i am very blessed to have such a loving father who is always there for me and does his best to make me happy Actually both my parents are pretty much awsome and I thank Allah for giving me such wonderful parents. For me, there is so much paina and suffering in the world that i just honestly cant bear to turn my back on it. I guess its just my nature but i want to take an 'active' part in helping these people. I look up to those aid workers, especially in gaza who are helping these innocent people. Some have suggested in staying home and helping out in my local cummunity, and i do lol I'm appart of Age Concern where i visit the elderly who have been completely abondoned by their family. I'm also apart of Youth voluntering team that helps provide faciliuty for school children to prevent the amount of youth crimes in london today. I've always wanted to help people, i gain a great amount of satisfaction from it, satisfaction that i wont find in a normal office job. I dont plan on being an aid worker all my life, i guess being married and having a family is pretty special thing in life that would be a shame in not experiencing

[Al-Zaara]

MashaAllah, great parents you've got! And I am especially glad to see you also think of the eldery, young people tend to "forget" about them.

Honestly though, you can have a family even though you travel. There are other jobs aswell that require lots of travelling but do far less for the suffering people out there. But no question about it would it be complicated and difficult to have a family while travelling all over th world.

You could also choose taking time off international aid working and go for local aid working while you have young children, for example, and later in your life again go for international aid working. This is just a suggestion.

Best option would of course be finding a man who is just as passionate about aid working like you are and is ready to travel with you and be flexible in his life aswell.

You've still got time inshaAllah, enough time to learn more about the work and what it requires and see how you can balance things. Yet it is true, we have to make sacrifices, this applies to all things in life. You really should ask aid workers near you about life and such, it really can help.

[youngsister]

Thank you so much for those supportive words. Yes my father supports me, i am very blessed to have such a loving father who is always there for me and does his best to make me happy Actually both my parents are pretty much awsome and I thank Allah for giving me such wonderful parents. For me, there is so much paina and suffering in the world that i just honestly cant bear to turn my back on it. I guess its just my nature but i want to take an 'active' part in helping these people. I look up to those aid workers, especially in gaza who are helping these innocent people. Some have suggested in staying home and helping out in my local cummunity, and i do lol I'm appart of Age Concern where i visit the elderly who have been completely abondoned by their family. I'm also apart of Youth voluntering team that helps provide faciliuty for school children to prevent the amount of youth crimes in london today. I've always wanted to help people, i gain a great amount of satisfaction from it, satisfaction that i wont find in a normal office job. I dont plan on being an aid worker all my life, i guess being married and having a family is pretty special thing in life that would be a shame in not experiencing

Masha Allah sister you seem like a sweet person with a great heart May Allah swt bless you.

I was thinking of doing the same thing as well..I wanted to work for the red cross as nurse/midwife, I love travelling but the whole mahram thing kind of made me think twice, I am still at uni so isha allah my circumstances might change.

Pray Istakarah as well sis