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Advice:Sister's Behavior

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    Advice:Sister's Behavior

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    I have a major problem and need help on fixing it.My sister doesn't dress islamicallly at all and doesn't do her obligatory Islamic duties[Ex:Prayer].I tried to tell my parents but they do not pray and wear Islamic clothing either.I learned the basics of Islam from a private teacher and now I don't have her anymore because I believe my parents think i am getting to serious about Islam.I heard that a women can drag her brother,husband,father and mother to hellfire because of the way she dresses.How can I stop this?Please help.inshAllah
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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior



    Before a person can change, their hearts have to become soft, hardened hearts cannot submit to the Creator, or carry out His orders.

    You need to introduce the basic descriptions of Jannah and Jahannam to your sister, describe the beauty of Jannah and the terrors of Jahannam.

    Depending on whether she is a reader or a listener, you need to give her articles/mp3 lectures on this topic.

    Gradually, she will InshaAllaah start desiring Jannah and fearing Jahannam - only then will she understand the haraam and halal in Islam, only then will she understand her obligatory duties towards Allaah.

    | MP3 Lecture (Anwar Al Awlaki) - Jannah Part 1 |

    | MP3 Lecture (Anwar Al Awlaki) - Jannah Part 2 |

    Start off with Jannah InshaAllaah....because if you scare a person off with Jahannam then its harder for them to listen to what you have to say.... (thats what I've found with most people anyway).

    ----------

    This is the best lecture I have come across on praying - it has the basic three things in it - the reward for praying, the punishment for not praying, and the practical ways in wich we can be steadfast in our prayers;

    | Time to establish prayer (MP3) |

    Or if she prefers reading;

    | Time to establish prayer (Transcript) |

    -----------

    death4 - Advice:Sister's Behavior

    "O you who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who do not disobey the Commands they receive from Allah, but do that which they are commanded." [Qur'aan, Chapter 66, Verse 6]

    Sheikh Feiz spends four lessons explaining in detail the Hellfire.

    | Track 1 |
    | Track 2 |
    | Track 3 |
    | Track 4 |

    -----------

    And this is the most important video, the heart softener, in my case....many many hearts can be melted through this video...

    A Meeting With Allah

    Click here for the video

    Linkto the text if you need to give that to your sister instead

    -----------

    I hope I was of some help, please remember me in your prayers InshaAllaah.

    Your sister in Islaam
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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior

    Well from what I remember, a person can only drag you down to hellfire if you choose to follow them. Allah does not allow one person to be punished for the sins of others, that is unjust and Allah is not unjust. Verify this, because I'm not 100% sure.

    As for your problem, I have the same one, so your not alone. Right now, I haven't done much about it, just make lots of duaa that your family's iman increases and they are guided to become closer to Islam. InshAllah it will work out, just take things slowly, don't jump to conclusions.
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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior

    JazakrAllah Khair for the advice but my sister was introduces to Jannah and Hellfire by our old Islamic teacher.That is actually the reason I believe my mother took us out of her class.My teacher told her the punishment of Hellfire and she cried to my mother and now I have no teacher.

    Also jazakrAllah khair for the links I'll check them out.inshAllah
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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior

    format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender View Post


    I have a major problem and need help on fixing it.My sister doesn't dress islamicallly at all and doesn't do her obligatory Islamic duties[Ex:Prayer].I tried to tell my parents but they do not pray and wear Islamic clothing either.I learned the basics of Islam from a private teacher and now I don't have her anymore because I believe my parents think i am getting to serious about Islam.I heard that a women can drag her brother,husband,father and mother to hellfire because of the way she dresses.How can I stop this?Please help.inshAllah
    When did Islam become about the outward with no thought about the inward?

    "none shall enter paradise except with a purified heart"

    The first step is get proper priorities.
    Advice:Sister's Behavior

    O my Lord,

    if I worship you
    from fear of hell, burn me in hell.

    If I worship you
    from hope of Paradise, bar me from its gates.

    But if I worship you
    for yourself alone, grant me then the beauty of your Face.
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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior

    Dear sister, you can only control yourself, order those you are authorized over, and advise those around you. Always think in these three levels: You have no control over anyone except yourself. You can only decide what you do and nobody else, so always make sure you do the right thing for you, and let people be people. As for those you control, those are your children, not your sister or parents. you order your children and they will listen and if they don't, you have the hadith of the prophet to guide you regarding teaching them and beating them if they miss the prayers. Your parents are not under your control, so you can only advise them. Get them authenticated speeches and warnings and talk to them over and over, but watch your tone and intensity so as to create desire and encouragement, not to create resentment and rejection.

    By the way, I feel I need to be responsible to say that I checked the transcript of "Time to establish Prayer", and there were factual mistakes and errors regarding the rulings and opinions of scholars. The majority of scholars namely Hanbali, Imam Shafei, Malik, Ibn Taymeyya, are of the opinion that as per the hadith leaving prayer is clear kufr, and a muslim is no longer a muslim if he neglects prayer, but the apostasy law is not applied because there is no outright declaration and repentance is always hoped, and historically no muslim who neglects prayer was ever killed. The minority view, mainly Hanafi and modern Shafei math-hab and other scholars, see that it is not kufr akbar, but kufr asghar (minor) which is Kufr Bel-Neema, and there is no punishment to be applied at all by the judge or whatever. This 6 month jail sentence is innovated and no record of it being called for by the prophet or companions. There are other factual misinformation but minor ones, that was the major one. In general I would suggest using a different source for your family.
    Advice:Sister's Behavior

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    Iblis's eternal destination in the Hellfire is due to Arrogance, not Disbelief.

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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior

    format_quote Originally Posted by Pomak View Post
    When did Islam become about the outward with no thought about the inward?

    "none shall enter paradise except with a purified heart"

    The first step is get proper priorities.
    From day 1

    its about inward and outward
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    Re: Advice:Sister's Behavior

    format_quote Originally Posted by Pomak View Post
    The first step is get proper priorities.
    Very true.

    Your sister doesn't even pray - why are you worried about hijab? The fact that she doesn't pray is a much bigger sin. Forget about hijab for now and focus on prayer and her general understanding of Islam. InshaAllah when she understands Islam then things like wearing hijab will come naturally to her.
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