They are Palestinians, and they are Israelis. They have lost their sisters and brothers and children, lost them in terrorist attacks, clashes, suicide bombings and military service.
They understand that the only way to break down the barriers and come out of their darkness is by recognizing one another.
They are dreaming of reconciliation.
They found one another through groups like Combatants for Peace and the Parents Circle-Families Forum, which runs educational forums to work on reconciliation.
They say it is critical to learn the other side’s narrative, because the only hope for ending the bloody struggle is through empathy and reconciliation.
In sharing the pain of bereavement, many have bonded and work closely together. Reconciliation with the enemy has become the purpose of their lives in the name of their dead.
After more than 30 years of photographing war and funerals, I find hope in meeting the bereaved families and witnessing their reconciliation process. If they can do this, everybody else should.
I attended their meetings, reconciliation sessions and activities. They devote much of their time to lecturing both Israeli and Palestinian youth about the sanctity of life. By appearing together at high schools and in public venues, they are living proof that there is another way. There are many activities to nurture their friendships: tours, field trips, cultural events. But forgiving is not forgetting (some refuse to use “forgiving” in their vocabulary.)
Many of the parents talk about the difficult progression to reconcile and befriend the enemy, and their own commitment is tested over and over again when they face hostility from their own people, or their own family members.
Israelis and Palestinians Tell Their Personal Stories
Bushra Awad, a 48-year-old Palestinian from the West Bank village of Beit Ummar, lost her 17-year-old son, Mahmoud, during a protest against Israeli soldiers in 2008. He was a high school student. This is her story:
Each day or night the Israeli soldiers invade our village and it ends in a clash with our youth resisting the occupiers. That day there was so much shooting by the soldiers I could hear it in my kitchen. It was so intense, from all directions, I suddenly felt that sharp pain in my heart. “Hurry, go find Mahmoud,” I begged my husband. “I feel something happened to our son,” I said, and he ran out.
I heard screams of my neighbors that my son was shot and I fell on the ground with that terrible pain in my heart. I knew I lost my child at that moment.
Later, days after Mahmoud was buried, my husband, Khaled, told me how he ran down the street toward the ambulances, arriving at the same time as the boys, running with our bleeding son, shot by Israeli soldiers. Mahmoud succumbed to his wounds on the way to the hospital in Hebron. My husband watched him dying.
Those days were days of grief, anger and vengeance. I wanted so much to go out and take revenge for my son. I wanted to go out and kill any Israeli. I’m a mother, I did not know I possessed such feelings of wanting to take somebody’s life. I was so full of pain and hate.
And in those mourning days, while women of the village were paying their condolences and respect, there was a lot of talk of what the mothers could possibly do to protect their children’s lives. So many young men of Beit Ummar have paid with their lives for resisting the occupation, and we, the grieving mothers, above all. None had an answer.
Our family was devastated after Mahmoud’s death. I knew I had to do something, anything, that would save my other children from a similar fate. But how? Then a friend, a woman who lost her family member in same circumstances, invited me to a meeting in her home with other bereaved. She told me there would be Israeli mothers present as well. I would not hear any of that; she was inviting me to meet my enemies! Those who caused us such great pain.
For two years, she kept inviting me, telling me it was important for our children, it was important to save more lives. I decided to go but I would not look at the Israelis or shake their hands, I would just listen. There I met an Israeli mother. She showed me a picture of her dead son, I showed her a picture of my son Mahmoud. We both cried for our loss. Ever since that meeting, I’m part of the circle of bereaved mothers. We share a pain, and we share a hope to end the bloody cycle and maybe one day our leaders will negotiate peace.
Meanwhile, we live such a fragile existence. Israeli soldiers continue to raid our village, and clashes ensue. My other son was injured and later imprisoned. I pray that one day peace will come and we can raise our sons without constant fear for their lives.
All mothers are the same.
Ben Kfir, a 65-year-old Israeli from Ashkelon, Israel, lost his daughter, Yael, 22, in a Palestinian suicide bombing at a bus station in 2003. She was an Israeli soldier. This is his story:
When the army officers arrived I knew, because Yael always called after every suicide bombing. She did not call that day, and an hour after the bombing I knew she never would.
I could not stop crying for days, and I was so full of anger that I could explode.
I was angry at the Palestinians for killing my child. I was angry at the army for not preventing the attack. I was angry at the leaders for not reaching a deal.
And I wanted revenge.
I started planning it into particulars. I was lying in bed for days planning my revenge. I thought it was either revenge or I die; there was no meaning to my life any longer.
I was fantasizing how I would walk over to the construction site near my house where Palestinians were working and shoot them.
I was planning it in such detail that I even knew what clothes I would wear to do the killings. The more I planned, the more I realized that, while achieving my revenge, my acts would bring more death to my people.
The families of the dead workers would surely seek revenge on Israelis, the army would retaliate in Gaza, and the circle of death would never end.
Desperation overcame me because I also realized I was only thinking of myself and my immense pain. I thought there was no other way, that I should just die.
In those awful days I received a pile of condolence letters which I hardly looked at, I was so immersed in my grief, anger and quest for vengeance. But I read this one, from a woman named Hagit, a bereaved mother.
I called her and we cried a lot. She invited me to a gathering of bereaved Israelis and Palestinians.
I hung the phone up on her.
But then, I just went. I did not know why, I went. I sat and listened to some 60 people, Israelis and Palestinians, and I was not alone in my grief any longer.
Those wonderful people gave me a reason to go on living. I realized that the Palestinian stories and my story are no different. Our tears taste the same; our blood is the same color. I feel more comfortable with a bereaved Palestinian then with a regular Israeli citizen. We know what loss is, the shadow of our dead following us every day, every moment of our lives. But I’m not a walking dead any longer.
I live for a cause, and this is what I am saying in every lecture. Whether Israelis or Palestinians, revenge is not an answer. It will only bring more and more death. It is not easy to open up your wounds and expose yourself in front of so many people every day, but I believe today that only through mass reconciliation can we make peace one day.
Simple people like me are the ones who can bring peace. The leaders only sign it.
Rina Castelnuovo, an Israeli photographer, has been documenting the conflict between Palestinians and Israelis for more than 30 years, 17 of them as a contract photographer for The New York Times based in Jerusalem.
Last edited by sister herb; 08-21-2013 at 08:49 AM.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
If we don't believe that peace is possible, then what would we do? All that would be left would be despair and hopelessness.
Believing in the possibility of a better and more peaceful world is what keeps me going and gives me the energy and courage to get up again every time I hear, see or read something which wants to steal that hope from me.
Every faith teaches the importance of living in peace and harmony with each other and showing love and care to those in need.
If we don't do that, we go against our own religious teachings. It is Satan who tells us otherwise!
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
Peace is certainly possible. I think the main obstacles are two things. One, the actions of Israel for the past decades are going to make it hard for the Palestinians to believe any peace offer is sincere. The second is probably the main systemic problem which is Israel's electoral system. They run a pretty pure proportional representation system which causes a total fragmentation of the party system. As a result no single party is able to make a government on its own and often has to search around for coalition partners. This makes being able to move ahead on anything difficult as every major decision is a collective action problem.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
Between those two groups I do not believe peace is possible. I do not believe that enough of each side of that conflict want peace. There is too much blind dogmatic hatred, fueled by past injustice, current injustice, and religious dogmatism to ever break through. Saddest part is that there are people on both sides who ARE amenable to peace and even fellowship, but there are too many dogmatists. You will not get rid of Israelis who see all of "Israel" as the holy land promissed to them by God and build settlements while complaining about Palestinians. You will not get rid of the Palestinians who see all of "Palestine" as their land and who will not accept the existence of the state of Israel and indiscriminately kill Israelis however they can. I don't see much room for compromise.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
At the year 2004 Hamas declared it may accept peace treatment with zionists. Few months from that zionists killed main leaders of Hamas as "terrorists".
Wanting peace may make you terrorist in this world as well.
Interesting world we live.
From Occupied Palestine:
We have suffered too much for too long. We will not accept apartheid masked as peace. We will settle for no less than our freedom.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
No matter how much we want and work for peace; as long as Israel doesn't give up the idea of getting all over the "promised land" (and it seems that they will never do), there will never be peace unless all the Palestinians are extinguished or wiped out of their lands.
By the way, it is not fair to describe the unequal situation there as if both sides suffer a lot. When there is one Israeli casualty against a hundred Palestinian casualties, we can't say it is a bilateral suffering. Nor can we say that it is a war or enmity; but it is a brutal oppression vs being oppressed. (Please don't misunderstand me. I don't mean that I don't feel any pity for those innocent Israeli casualties. Nor do I support everything that Hamas do. But the Israeli state is currently a terrorist state.)
Have you ever watched the documentary 'Occupation 101'? If not, please watch this unique video on YouTube to understand how the facts are manipulated.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
Greetings and peace be with you Pygoscelis;
There is too much blind dogmatic hatred,
Israel is mostly a secular country now, I think the struggle is more about past injustice on both sides, but mostly to do with power and money. If God and religion were an issue; then these verses would have a meaning.
Ezekiel 47
21 “You are to distribute this land among yourselves according to the tribes of Israel. 22 You are to allot it as an inheritance for yourselves and for the foreigners residing among you and who have children. You are to consider them as native-born Israelites; along with you they are to be allotted an inheritance among the tribes of Israel. 23 In whatever tribe a foreigner resides, there you are to give them their inheritance,” declares the Sovereign LORD.
Leviticus 24
You are to have the same law for the alien and the native-born. I am the LORD your God.
Leviticus 19
33 " 'When an alien lives with you in your land, do not mistreat him. 34 The alien living with you must be treated as one of your native-born. Love him as yourself, for you were aliens in Egypt. I am the LORD your God.
Exodus 12:49
The same law applies to the native-born and to the alien living among you."
Exodus 22:21
"Do not mistreat an alien or oppress him, for you were aliens in Egypt.
Leviticus 19:10
Do not go over your vineyard a second time or pick up the grapes that have fallen. Leave them for the poor and the alien. I am the LORD your God.
Deuteronomy 27
19 “Cursed is anyone who withholds justice from the foreigner, the fatherless or the widow.”
Leviticus 25
23 “‘The land must not be sold permanently, because the land is mine and you reside in my land as foreigners and strangers. 24 Throughout the land that you hold as a possession, you must provide for the redemption of the land.
Then all the people shall say, “Amen!”
In the spirit of praying for justice for all people
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
format_quote Originally Posted by Eric H
Israel is mostly a secular country now, I think the struggle is more about past injustice on both sides, but mostly to do with power and money. If God and religion were an issue; then these verses would have a meaning.
The degree of religiousity may not necessarily correlate to amenability towards peace. There seem to be three main strands in Jewish politics: Liberal, Conservative, and Orthodox. These roughly correspond to what type of Judaism one practices. The Conservative strand are the most in support of annexing Palestinian lands. The Liberals are agreeable to some sort of peace deal and theoretically Orthodox may be as well. They at first resisted (and many still refuse) to recognize the Israeli state as they believe that the Jews were only suppose to return at a time that corresponded with religious prophecy. They only problem is that this is really the only thin that Liberals and Orthodox could potentially agree on so that chances of such a coalition government are very slim.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
^^ It is very likely that people can´t never find kind of conditions in any place or country, where 100% of the people would be absolutely equal and get 100% justice, but we just have to try the find the best solutions also to the most difficult conflicts...
From Occupied Palestine:
We have suffered too much for too long. We will not accept apartheid masked as peace. We will settle for no less than our freedom.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
format_quote Originally Posted by sister herb
^^ It is very likely that people can´t never find kind of conditions in any place or country, where 100% of the people would be absolutely equal and get 100% justice, but we just have to try the find the best solutions also to the most difficult conflicts...
All I can say is that it looks like an impossible situation. It is not in man's hand. Only God can bring peace in this world now.
Re: Is peace ever possible between the worst enemies?
^^ Religion is not cause of problems of that area at all. People of course can blame religion(s) about this and that problems they have caused by they own political acts, when the reason is absolutely something else.
From Occupied Palestine:
We have suffered too much for too long. We will not accept apartheid masked as peace. We will settle for no less than our freedom.
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