At age of 6 I got really sick and went into coma for 5 months. Woke up from the coma and finding that I have lost 70% of my hearing and memory loss aswell. Learning everything such as walking, speaking, who my family was from the start again.
Then a year passed where my father passed away from a car accident. So fast forward to the present. In life anything is possible.
I did everything from college, to uni and got my grades Alhamdulilah and got the job I wanted in the finance section.
So Alhamdulilah everything was great and I meet this beautiful girl from my uni and couple years passed and we got married. Despite everything that happened I was really happy to have someone i love in my life.
Couple weeks later after the wedding I have learned that my wife was not happy and she was basically forced to marry me by her parents. It killed me inside learning this. We have been together for 8 months in halal way getting to know each other.
And I had to let her go after a month eventhough I really really did and still love her but I can see her hurting inside and putting brave face on.
It has been a month now since the separation and I can't bring myself to go home as it reminds me everything of my wife, I have been avoiding my own family because of this and I hate them to see me like this. I'm finding myself working alot now staying hours behind in the office or just sit in the car.
I am at the point where I find myself empty, worthless & cursed. I'm a strong person but losing the person I really loved has destroyed me and I don't blame her since she was forced. I wished that she had the courage to tell me this before hand.
Everyday is like a nightmare now, I'm still in peace when I am asleep but as soon I wake up i can see what I am missing again.
I am religious person and looking back. Why did I deserve all this, when will this end. Why me and why do I feel so damn cursed. I'm just tired to be honest
-The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:
“There is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and says:
‘Allaahumma inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn amatika naasyati bi yadika, maadhin fiyya hukmuka,
‘adlun fiyya qadhaa’uka. As’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu
fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilmil-ghaybi ‘indaka
an taj’al al-Qur’aana rabee’a qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’ huzni wa thihaab hammi
[O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your female slave; my forelock is
in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just.
I ask You by every name belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or revealed
in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge
of the Unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast,
and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety],’ but Allaah will take away his distress
and grief, and replace it with joy.” 27
He was asked: “O Messenger of Allaah, should we learn this?” He said: “Of course; everyone who hears it
should learn it.”
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Don't know who actually said it.
There is richness in knowing. Thank Allah for giving you that experience. You had the girl of your dreams. But it was not meant to be. Allah has something else in store for you, something else for me and everybody. It tires Him not to manage 3lameen.
Only thing for us in essence, is to maintain imaan, remain patient always, and keep moving forward.. You pass your test.... mashaAllah.
Maybe now is the time to focus on your career and deen give yourself say 3 years to set yourself up. You may run into someone new.
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Don't know who actually said it.
There is richness in knowing. Thank Allah for giving you that experience. You had the girl of your dreams. But it was not meant to be. Allah has something else in store for you, something else for me and everybody. It tires Him not to manage 3lameen.
Only thing for us in essence, is to maintain imaan, remain patient always, and keep moving forward.. You pass your test.... mashaAllah.
Maybe now is the time to focus on your career and deen give yourself say 3 years to set yourself up. You may run into someone new.
Welcome to the forum. Wishing you a great stay.
I really appreciate your kind words Greenhill. I hope this pain I have passes as it's really unbearable.
There is a wisdom in it
You don't know what hiding in the future for you
Every hardship come with experience and a gift but most of us forget to think about the wisdom in it because as Allah mention in surat Alkahf ( He said, "Indeed, with me you will never be able to have patience.
And how can you have patience for what you do not encompass in knowledge?"
And because we don't know the decree we think just about what we think is good , look at this first ( 71 ) So they set out, until when they had embarked on the ship, al-Khidh r tore it open. [Moses] said, "Have you torn it open to drown its people? You have certainly done a grave thing." At that time those people can say ... why Allah let all the other ship ? Why us ? But after a while they know that : As for the ship, it belonged to poor people working at sea. So I intended to cause defect in it as there was after them a king who seized every [good] ship by force.
And if you make a new relationship with this surah it will make you realize that every hardship bring so many good things in it and after it
But just we need to seek help through patience and prayer, and indeed, it is difficult except for the humbly submissive [to Allah]
Who are certain that they will meet their Lord and that they will return to Him.
Life is test and you don't know , she may be come to you one day to tell you I want to return but just if Allah see that good for you
Don't say why did I deserve all this ??
Because You will say it in the future but in different way.... you will say did I deserve from Allah all that love when I was thinking like this, while he preparing all that good for me
We need to be patient
And there is a saying of Shaykh muhammad hassan say "the heart of the one you love is between Allah's hand "... if you do your effort to pleased Allah he will give you more than you wishe
But don't say I did my efforts, and look what Allah does for me
It's not for Allah to do this ... but he tells us in the coran : ( 1 ) Alif, Lam, Meem
( 2 ) Do the people think that they will be left to say, "We believe" and they will not be tried?
( 3 ) But We have certainly tried those before them, and Allah will surely make evident those who are truthful, and He will surely make evident the liars. 29:1/3
And sometimes we see the good in something and by the time we see that this was the worst thing can be done
Man invokes evil instead of goodness for he is very hasty and impatient. 17:11
He prays to Allah for alI such things as are the immediate need of the time, though often subsequent experience shows that if Allah had granted his prayer, it would have been very harmful to him.
One day we all will die the one who live good or bed .. but at the the end of this, the winner will be the one who live for Allah even everything.
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