People say “be true to Allah, trust in him, he will take care of you, he is merciful”. Lately though I cant help but wonder, if he is so merciful why does my heart keep hurting? I beg him all the time to help me but the pain doesn’t stop. I look around and I see ppl that never pray, people that don’t thank Alalh for anything, don’t even mention his name and yet they have the nice life. They have a family and children, and a nice home and they are surrounded by ppl who care about them, but me…..I am alone.
I know already some of you will say … take comfort that you may be suffering now to have your reward in the afterlife. But what if Im beginning to wonder if the afterlife even exists. And maybe others will say, accept the suffering as part of HIS will, but what if instead of accepting it, its only making me hate this life, and even begin to hate HIM I know I shouldn’t say that but I cant help what I feel.........Im tired! I never thought my heart would be so tired at only 30yrs.
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People say “be true to Allah, trust in him, he will take care of you, he is merciful”. Lately though I cant help but wonder, if he is so merciful why does my heart keep hurting? I beg him all the time to help me but the pain doesn’t stop. I look around and I see ppl that never pray, people that don’t thank Alalh for anything, don’t even mention his name and yet they have the nice life. They have a family and children, and a nice home and they are surrounded by ppl who care about them, but me…..I am alone.
I know already some of you will say … take comfort that you may be suffering now to have your reward in the afterlife. But what if Im beginning to wonder if the afterlife even exists. And maybe others will say, accept the suffering as part of HIS will, but what if instead of accepting it, its only making me hate this life, and even begin to hate HIM I know I shouldn’t say that but I cant help what I feel.........Im tired! I never thought my heart would be so tired at only 30yrs.
salams
Well the shaytan is making you forget that the prophet himself went through more hardship than you! Yet that didn't make him double visioned, his goals where set straight.
As for your wondering if the afterlife exists... i think that's because you probably don't really think hard enough whenyou read the quran and what the messenger thinks... just take for example what the prophet told us about the end of time and how accurate his prophecies where, that's enough to make you startle.
I mean.. the issue is, why are you doubting the existance of the afterlife? Surely Allah didn't create us for no reason, and surely we didn't exist out of coincidence, so why the doubts?
read in surat al hadeed, Allah says that if the whole world was disbelievers he would hav even gave them more wealth and status in this world to make them even more misguided.
Because when you think of it... what is the material of this life besides a bunch of atoms bunched up in different arrangements which cause ppl to be so attracted to them...
dunno... but perhaps if u b more specific we can offer better advise inshalah...
salams
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Have you realized how close to Allah you have become because of this time of hardship. You call upon His name and ask Him for mercy and guidance... Do you think you will think of Allah as much as this if you were given everything you've wanted?
Do you know if what you ask is good for you? Allah knows whether what you ask of Him is good for you or not... and surely, Allah will grant you what you ask when you're ready to recieve it and it is good for you.
Suffering is NOT His will... your suffering is from the shaytaan and yourself. Allah does not will what is bad for you... if you're "suffering" now... perhaps you're being saved from something worse.
The prophet (sws) said... be in this world as if you were a traveler... do you build a house and accumulate wealth wherever you travel to? No... yes, sometimes it is necessary to have some "luxaries" but do we really need them?
Only you and Allah knows what you're going through... I'll only encourage you to keep asking Allah to relieve you of this hardship... for every hardship is followed by ease... if you really wish to gain something in this world... Ask Allah to give you in this world AND in the hereafter. Although hereafter is better for you.
May Allah keep you in the best of Imaan, Inshallah.
intersting.
hey, maybe its a good thing that you hate this life.
it seems that you are uncomfortable with these feelings: as you say: know I shouldn’t say that but I cant help what I feel.
try reverse the thinking. i know its hard, ut once you get into the habit, alhamudlilah, its easy. you may even look back one day and htink: how could i even be thinkng like that.
Al-Ibtilaa' means to be tried or tested. Allah tests us with wealth, plenty, ease and power just as He tests us with poverty, hardship and oppression. Al-Ibtilaa' is a sunnah of Allah Most High. Throughout history, Allah has tested the bearers of His messages and others among His slaves. The test of Allah can be very hard, but by means of it Allah raises the level of His prophets and erases the sins of the righteous believers. The complete defeat of the Muslims and the overrunning of their homes and property by the disbelievers is NOT one of Allah's tests which he puts on the believers. Rather, it is a sign of their having fallen out of Allah's favor through their crimes and sins.
The Prophet(sas) informed us that the presence of tests indicates the presence of iman and that a believer may continue to be tested until he has no sin remaining. Although Allah's tests can benefit us in the long run, a believer does not wish for the test of Allah - rather he always hopes for the forgiveness and mercy of Allah Most High. Allah said in the Qur'an:
{And we will surely test you with some fear, hunger and shortages of property, people and produce. But give good tidings to the steadfast. Those who, when a calamity befalls them say: "We belong to Allah and to Him we return." Upon these are prayers from their Lord and mercy and these are the rightly-guided ones.}
Al-Baqarah: 155-157
Allah's test which we may face include:
Fear - a state of insecurity and fear from harm which may be inflicted by enemies or oppressive rulers or common criminals. This is a test currently being faced by Muslims in many parts of the world.
Hunger - local famines from natural causes or as a result of war and oppression.
Shortage of Property - caused by imbalances in the Muslim Ummah and the failure for parts of it to help other parts. There will never global poverty or famine in this Ummah because Allah has promised never to destroy the Muslims with these things.
Shortage of People - from death through diseases or jihad or the abandmonent of Islam by many of its people.
When afflicted with these kind of tests, a believer remembers Allah and that Allah created us from nothing, is in full control of all events and is the one who we will face for judgement in the hereafter. This is the consciousness of the qadr (omnipotence) of Allah Most High. This is the consciousness which gives us patience and steadfastness before whatever tests we may face from Allah.
In another verse, Allah said:
{We will surely test you in your wealth and in yourselves and you will hear many hurtful things from those who were given the book before you and from those who associate others with Allah. If you are steadfast and beware of Allah, that is the strongest position.}
Aal 'Imraan: 186
Allah here warns us of some of the hardships we will definitely face as Muslims in this world. Wealth can be a test both when it is plentiful and when it is scarce. The Prophet (sas) stated in the hadith that he did not fear for his nation poverty, rather he feared for us the ill effects of plenty.
The Prophet (sas) said:
"There is no hardship which afflicts a Muslim but that Allah expiates with it some sin of his - even a thorn which pricks him."
Muslim and Bukhari
"How amazing is the affair of the believer! Everything which happens is good for him. And that is for no one except the believer. When he encounters good times and ease, he gives thanks and that is good for him and if he encounters hardship he is steadfast and that is good for him."
Muslim
"The analogy of the believer is like the grain crops - the wind continually beats it back and forth. And a believer continues to be afflicted with trials. And, the analogy of the munaafiq (hypocrite) is like the cedar tree - it stands firm with no motion until it is cut down."
Muslim and At-Tirmidhi
Al-Fudhail ibn 'Iyaadhh said: "Whoever complains about a calamity which comes his way it is as if he has complained against his Lord."
There are several verses in the Holy Quran, which make reference to the value of applying the tools of patience and perseverance in order to attain success in this world and in the hereafter. For example :
S2 V153 : “ O ye who believe! Seek help with patient perseverance & prayer : for Allah is with those who patiently persevere !
S2 V45 : Seek Allah’s help with patient perseverance
S3 V 200 : O ye who believe ! Persevere in patience & constancy : vie in such perseverance : strengthen each other ; and fear Allah that ye may prosper
S11 V 115 : ….and be steadfast in patience
S7 V 128 : Said Moses to his people : “ Pray for help from Allah and (wait) in patience and constancy
The above verses of the Holy Quran are filled with hope and assurance from Allah (SWT). Allah (SWT), in His Infinite Mercy & Infinite Kindness, gives us the assurance, that He is with those that patiently persevere. What more can we ask for ? Furthermore, Allah (SWT) encourages us to continue persevering. Persevering means to strive in the face of obstacles. It means that one should not give up. It means that failure should not be regarded as the end of the world – failure is simply a stepping stone to success and a vital ingredient for success. No matter how insurmountable the obstacle and no matter how huge the problem, one should never give up hope and trust in Allah (SWT). It is this hope, combined with steadfastness and patient perseverance, that is the recipe for success and for dealing with life’s problems.
The tools of patience and perseverance are generally applicable in two main situations:
(1) Goals : to achieve any goal in life, then patience, perseverance, determination and focus are the essential & vital ingredients that are required to attain one’s goals & objectives
(2) Adversity : any difficulty, hardship, major problem or calamity becomes bearable and tolerable by using patience and perseverance and placing one’s trust and hope in Allah (SWT).
However, Allah (SWT), Most Gracious, Most Merciful, reminds us that even though He is testing us, and even though the problem we are faced with seems unbearable, we receive tremendous amount of hope and courage from the following verse :
S2 V 286 : “ On no soul doth Allah place a burden greater than it can bear”
Allah (SWT) knows us better than we know ourselves. Allah (SWT) knows that we will be able to bear the burden of the problems that besiege us. From our point of view, some problems seem to have no solutions and they appear so huge that we want to give up. But Allah (SWT) reminds us that in times of difficulty, we should pray to Allah(SWT) and patiently persevere. Furthermore, Allah (SWT), Most Gracious, Most Merciful, again gives us tremendous courage and hope when He says :
S94 V6 : “ Verily, with every difficulty, there is relief”
No matter how severe or long the problem is, it has to end. That is definite. This is what gives us courage. This is what inspires us to put all our trust in Allah (SWT) and to patiently persevere, for relief may be just around the corner.
When we are faced with problems in life, such as financial problems, marital problems, exam problems, health problems, family problems etc, then we usually have a few choices in solving these problems :
(a) we can either follow the Straight Path, Pray to Allah (SWT) and patiently persevere and seek a solution to the problem that is within the guidelines of the Holy Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet (SAW)
(b) or, we can take the shortcut, and fall prey to the whims and illusions of Shaytaan
(c) or, we can ignore the problem and hope that it will go away, but this simply makes the problem worse
Furthermore, it is during our times of difficulty and weakness, that Shaytaan is most active and tries very hard to influence us to his evil ways, as stated in the following verses of the Quran :
S4 V 119 : “I will mislead them and I will create in them false desires “
Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 8.477, narrated by Abu Said (RA), that the Holy Prophet Mohamed (SAW) said :
“ He who remains patient, Allah will bestow patience upon him, and he who is satisfied with what he has, Allah will make him self – sufficient. And there is no gift better and vast than patience”
(khutbahbank.org)
so fear Allah n turn to him repentance n wait for Allah's help. know that He dosent care whether u hate him or not coz He is rich n ur poor n the end u will go bk to him. it only those who have sabr that He loves. Allah only test those that He loves...so fear Him.
I look around and I see ppl that never pray, people that don’t thank Alalh for anything, don’t even mention his name and yet they have the nice life. They have a family and children, and a nice home and they are surrounded by ppl who care about them, but me…..I am alone.
Approx. 70 years of a good life and an eternity in hell-fire. :X
Last edited by Malaikah; 10-29-2006 at 12:49 PM.
Reason: lol thanks for correction
"If this Dunya was not a station of tests it would not be filled with sicknesses and filth. If life were not about hardship, then the Prophets and the pious would have lived the most comfortable of lives. Nay, Adam suffered test after test until he left the Dunya. Nuh cried for 300 years. Ibrahim was thrown into a pit of fire and later told to slaughter his son. Ya'qub cried until he becameblind. Musa challenged Fir'own and was tested by his people.
Eeasa (as) had no provision except the morsels his disciples provided him with. And Muhammad (Sal Allahu Alayhi wa Sallam) met poverty with patience, his uncle - one of the most beloved relatives to him - was slain and mutilated and his people disbelieved in him ... and the list of Prophets and the pious goes on and on."What happens to us happens by the will of Allah. It is an article of our Eeman in Qada' and Qadr that we are pleased with
Allah's choice, Good or seemingly bad it is all the test of this Dunya. How could we imagine that we shall not be tested when those who were better than us suffered what they suffered. They however came away with the pleasure of Allah, Subhaanahu wa Ta'Aala.
I will just post some Ahadeeth which I find comfort in when I feel down. I hope they help.
Narrated Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri and Abu Huraira:
The Prophet said, "No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that."
'Ata' b. Abi Rabih said: Ibn Abbas said to me: May I show you a woman of Paradise? I said: Yes. He said: Here is this dark-complexioned woman. She came to Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) and said: I am suffering from falling sickness and I become naked; supplicate Allah for me, whereupon he (the Holy Prophet) said: Show endurance as you can do and there would be Paradise for you and, if you desire, I supplicate Allah that He may cure you. She said: I am prepared to show endurance (but the unbearable trouble is) that I become naked, so supplicate Allah that He should not let me become naked, so he supplicated for her.
Anas b. Malik reported that Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said that one amongst the denizens of Hell who had led a life of ease and plenty amongst the people of the world would be made to dip in Fire only once on the Day of Resurrection and then it would be said to him: O, son of Adam, did you find any comfort, did you happen to get any material blessing? He would say: By Allah, no, my Lord. And then that person from amongst the persons of the world be brought who had led the most miserable life (in the world) from amongst the inmates of Paradise. and he would be made to dip once in Paradise and it would be said to him. 0, son of Adam, did you face, any hardship? Or had any distress fallen to your lot? And he would say: By Allah, no,0 my Lord, never did I face any hardship or experience any distress.
I also personally hope to write a list of blessings that I have, maybe one a day or something to I can spend time to ponder over just how many blessings I have been given by G-d. Before I became Muslim I had problems like that which you describe, yet Allah still gave me Islam, to me that shows Mercy so much.
I think just knowing you believe in G-d is the biggest Mercy, imagine if you didn't if Allah didn't allow you to believe if He sealed your heart, it would mean you go through the pain in this world and the next, something that I can't help think about when I look at my family. That is truly upsetting.
Remember sister/brother, that a person worse off than you and me be dipped in paradise and this person wont feel that you've had any hardship as such in the dunya. So then Imagine us!
Love you for the sake of Allah
The path is long but I hope we meet,
After the grave and the Day, in paradise in bliss upon a reclined seat.
A traveler traveling - travelled from shirk to tawheed,
If I'm remembered for anything - let it be the Mercy I seek.
I am going through hard times as well, though not as serious as the original poster. What really worries/confuses/drives me up the wall me is that I don't know whether this is a test, which even Prophets (peace be upon them) went through, or a punishment for my multitude of sins.
I am young, and this is the first time in my life that I'm going through hard times.
I've become quite religous over the last year or so, doing lots of ibadat, but the quality of my prayer(ie the attention with wich I perform it) has gone down lately.
Oh yeah, and the hard times are only two weeks old, so I might be jumping the gun a bit here.
I found the following text from a link in someone's signature. It's very helpful indeed. Everyone should read it, going through difficulties or not.
All of us want to attain the best in the
Aakhira. We dread the punishment of
the grave, we fear the Fire and we are
terrified of the Reckoning that will
take place.
We all want to be safe from the trials
and tribulations of the Day of Judgement,
to have our balance of good
deeds heavier than our balance of bad
deeds.
But when it comes to the crunch, why
is it that our sinning outweighs the
good that we do? Why is it that we
only remember Allaah in times of
hardship and He is forgotten in times
of ease?
In addition, when opportunities arise
where we can make our scale of
righteous deeds heavy, we seem not
to recognise the blessing or we have
no realisation of what is happening.
For example, when Allaah
chooses to test us in this dunya,
whether it be through our wealth, our
families, our possessions or something
else, we should not treat it as
though an injustice has been done to
us, nor should we question the Decree
of Allaah the Most High.
Allaah (swt) has told us that each of
us will be tested, Allaah says in the Qur’aan:
‘Do they think that they will be left
alone because they say: We believe…?’
[Al-Ankaboot: 2]
How we respond to and deal with
these tests will either strengthen our
Eemaan and raise our ranks in the
Sight of Allaah, or they will cause us
to become weaker and will earn the
displeasure of Allaah. The Prophet (saw) said:
‘The strong believer is better and
more beloved to Allaah than the
weak believer, and there is goodness
in both. Strive for that which
will benefit you, seek help from
Allaah and do not despair. If a mishap
should happen to befall you,
then do not say, ‘If only I had acted
… such and such would have happened.’
Rather say:
‘Qaddar Allaahu wa maa shaa’a fa’al’
‘Allaah has decreed and what He
wills, He does.’
….For verily, ‘if’ lets in the work
of the devil.’ [Muslim]
So when Allaah decides to test us,
we must bear with it patiently, keeping
within the boundaries of Islaam
and turning only to Allaah. We must
always strive to be obedient to
Allaah and to yearn for that which is
with Him and we must seek Allaah’s
assistance with this striving. We
should not despair under any circumstances
or become lazy in seeking
His obedience and assistance.
But for those of us who fail to comply
with the lawful manner in dealing
with afflictions, we find that the
same tongues that make that declaration
of faith also release countless
excuses for the owners actions and
behaviours. Whether we wish to acknowledge
the fact or not, life is difficult
and testing. Allaah has deliberately
made it so in order that our
next life may be easier. Not only
that, but it can improve our character
if we are able to handle situations
with the right approach.
The Messenger of Allaah (saw) and
his companions (ra) were thoroughly
tested and we all know that they
were the best of people and the best
generation that ever lived on this
earth. We suffer nothing in comparison
and yet we still moan and groan
about how hard and painful certain
situations are. The Messenger of Allaah (saw) said
in one narration, “For any trouble,
illness, worry, grief, hurt or sorrow
which afflicts a Muslim, even
the pricking of a thorn, Allaah removes
in its stead some of his
(minor) sins. [Riyaadus Saaliheen]
In another narration, ‘His minor
sins fall away from him as leaves
shed from a tree.’ [Ibid]
So we must come to the realisation
that tests are a blessing from Allaah,
for the Prophet (saw) said,
‘Whosoever Allaah intends to do
good to, he brings misfortune and
calamity upon him.’ [Bukhaaree]
Furthermore, if we look to the
Qur’aan, we find that there is more
gain than there is loss for one who is
able to handle the situation correctly.
Even though one may have recognition
of Allaah’s tests, one also needs
realisation. The realisation that no
matter how painful or difficult situations
get, Allaah will never overburden
a soul with more than it can
bear. Allaah says in the Qur’aan: ‘Allaah
burdens not a person beyond his
scope.’ [Baqarah: 286]
Our limited perception of things may
bring us to think that everything is
too much to handle, but if that was
so, then Allaah would never have
decreed it. He (swt) knows our
weaknesses and our strengths, far
better than we ourselves do and what
will be tested will be our weaknesses.
If the case was otherwise
then in what ways will we improve
and upon what purpose will the test
be? Allaah says in the Qur’aan: ‘And We
shall test you until We know those of
you who strive hard in the path of
Allaah and those of you who patiently
persevere.’ [Muhammed:31]
Therefore, rather than losing hope in
the situation, one should keep all
trust and reliance solely upon Allaah
for He will never let a true believer
down. He only does it because He
loves good and wishes ease for us -
and it is this short life’s difficulties
which creates the next, eternal life’s
ease. This is only if we abide by the
first and foremost condition that
hardships are to be borne with patience.
Allaah says in the Qur’aan: ‘And
seek help in patience and in prayer,
you need some divine inspiration
my advice may seem a bit odd but give it a go.
- open a translation of the Quran at a random page and start reading.
inshallah thatll do thr trick.
May Allah guide us all.
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