[anonymous]

salam

I have a nephew wwhos a bit disabled. He's lik any other child, but he's a lil bit disabled he goes to a special school. He is my sisters son, I really do love him but I can't stand cleaning after him when he does number two. I always feel grossed out. I am really not a bad hearted person, but I feel guilty that I feel the way I do. His parents are divorced. Him and my sister live with us. Sometimes when my sister isnt around I have to clean him. When he use to be younger I use to do it but now he's 10 I feel always weird. He's growing up, so putting my hand there is becoming difficult. I try to use wet toilet paper first, than use my hand to finish it all. I know that he's my nephew, I'm his family. These feelings I'm sharing are only secret to me, please advice me thank u. I feel bad that I feel bad sometimes doing it, like I dont get excited when I have to do it. Does that mean that I am a bad person, because Allah made him the way he is, if he was able h would have done it himself. JazalakAllah Khayr.

 

[zahraa]

10 years old u know thas quite old i guess dat doesnt make u a bad person because obviously he is growing up and i know he is family but urmm i think yoou should looks besides everyfing and just do it i guess because i have brother who is ten and i would aswell be a bit grossed out but just do it for allahs sake you know because at the end of the day you are getting good deeds added to the stack so basically just see it as a job you get paid to do but this ALLAH SUBHANALLAH will reward you i dont the saying but all i know is when some1 is disabled and person looks after him he does get rewarded by ALLAH i hope this helped ;-)

 

[Nihila]

SubhanAllah!

First off let me say, feeling uncomfortable in such situations is natural. It does not make you a bad person. I work with kids with special needs...and these things still make me uncomfortable too! It's all part of the natural hayaa we've been blessed with! But bro, if you're feeling icky about it, imagine how your nephew feels...he's a kid, and being a kid is hard enough what with all the emotions and awkwardness...

But no, those feelings do not make you a bad person...

May Allah swt reward you and your family, and grant your nephew ease in this life and Jannat-al-firdous Aameen

 

[Tony]

firstly well done for not letting him know how you feel, think about it from his point of veiw brother, he has no choice and he is likely to hate it more. your reward is building bro and if u dont do it then a stranger will end up doing it. What i suggest is that you keep doing this task and while urat it ask if you can do anything else, bath/shower etc.what ur doing is very special and and the boy will be more than aware of your qualities. You will get used to it as time passes. May Allah reward you in this life and the next for your continuing compassion, Ameen