Balancing righteousness and mercy?

[glo]

I was reading an interesting book, which looked a the Beatitudes (Jesus' sermon on the Mount) and how we should apply this teaching in our lives today.

One thing which struck me was the author's comment that some of Jesus' instructions seemed paradoxical and very difficult to put into action together.
In particular these two:

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they shall be satisfied.
And
Blessed are the merciful,
for they shall obtain mercy.


The dictionary defines righteousness like this:
1.characterized by, proceeding from, or in accordance with accepted standards of morality, justice, or uprightness; virtuous
2.morally justifiable or right, esp from one's own point of view

And mercy like this:
1.compassionate or kindly forbearance shown toward an offender, an enemy, or other person in one's power; compassion, pity, or benevolence
2.the discretionary power of a judge to pardon someone or to mitigate punishment
3.an act of kindness, compassion, or favour


I think this leads essentially to the question of how we (not just Christians, but Muslims and people from other faiths too) balance the notion of righteousness (= living a good and righteous life, following moral rules etc) and mercy (= being forgiving and compassionate towards those who fail to live righteously)?

I observe some people in my life, who are very good at teaching and preaching about morality and avoiding sin … but often hand in hand with that attitude goes being harsh and judgemental of others.

Then I observe other people, who are compassionate and understanding of people who act sinfully and fall short of the moral laws … sometimes so understanding that they forget to point out the mistakes and teach about moral values.


So my question is, how easy/possible is it for us to strike the right balance between teaching what is right and at the same time being compassionate towards those who get it wrong (bearing in mind that we are all in that boat, and that we all get it wrong, at least from time to time – I know I do!)?

The author of the book suggested that the only person to have achieved that balance, and whose example we should look towards, was Jesus himself. (Muslims, I am sure, would look towards the conduct of Muhammad.)


What are your thoughts and experiences of this?
How do you strike the balance personally?

I would love to hear your thoughts and comments.

 

[SalamChristian]

Glo,

This is a great question, and I have been pondering the same thing myself.

My preliminary answer is that the distinction between righteousness and mercy is a deeply personal experience-a fine line which the Holy Spirit shows us. For example, I am an Econ grad, and I have a strong moral sense of righteous economic policy and the place for mercy and social uplift. I am sure the same goes for a prison warden or police officer or politician or psychiatric nurse or any other calling.

I believe that mercy means not hoping to get even, or hoping for someone's ****ation.

 

[SalamChristian]

Sorry! I didn't get to finish my response, because I was typing it on my phone.

Right, I believe that mercy means not hoping to get even, or hoping for someone's ****ation. We are called to even hope and pray that even our enemies find God, repent, and allow his grace and mercifulness to bring about their salvation. That is a large part of the Gospel in a sentence.

Interestingly, Muslims are called to do the same, from my reading and understanding of the Qu'ran, and my discussions with Muslim friends. There is a story in one of the hadiths about a man that Muhammad (saw) said was going to heaven. His companions asked him why, and he said it was because every night, before bed, he forgave his enemies and everyone who had wronged him.

I would really ask that one of our Muslim brothers respond to this question, because it is one which I have been also thinking about. I too have been wondering what the position of Muslims and the Qu'ran is on this topic. Especially, I am wondering how holy battles like Badr would fit into this model. I know that Allah (swt) states in the Qu'ran that even those enemies which God has urged the Muslims to slay in self-defense are to be shown forgiveness if they repent and accept God. That is a very extreme example of how tense the relationship between righteousness and mercy can be.

Salaam Alaikum

 

[PouringRain]

It is really late and I should be asleep, so I won't go into too much this moment..... I just wanted to give a vague surface comment that Solomon had things to say on this topic in Proverbs. (If someone else wants to pull out verses, then be my guest. I may not have time until next Monday. LOL )

 

[Pygoscelis]

This question isn't really for me, but as an outsider to this (and one effected by your choices above) I would much rather a kind merciful understanding person who has some moral struggles (which I'm more than willing to help them with) than an arrogant holier than thou person who follows all the "rules" and thinks it makes them superior.

 

[PouringRain]

This question isn't really for me, but as an outsider to this (and one effected by your choices above) I would much rather a kind merciful understanding person who has some moral struggles (which I'm more than willing to help them with) than an arrogant holier than thou person who follows all the "rules" and thinks it makes them superior.

Must there be extremes? What about a righteous person who "follows the rules," yet has a heart of compassion and mercy?

 

[SalamChristian]

This question isn't really for me, but as an outsider to this (and one effected by your choices above) I would much rather a kind merciful understanding person who has some moral struggles (which I'm more than willing to help them with) than an arrogant holier than thou person who follows all the "rules" and thinks it makes them superior.

I think that when you consider this "dichotomy," you have to throw perspective into the mix. I know that my perspective may be flawed, so I never go into a situation immediately accusing someone, and even when conflict reaches the point of accusations or action in self-defense, I keep my mind open that I may have been wrong. If I am wrong, I always apologize and ask for forgiveness. But if I have a lot of information about a subject and I feel I am more informed than my detractors, I am not afraid to stand up for what I believe.

Consider the perspective of someone like Rosa Parks who made a strong stand and had convictions about her rights as a citizen and a human being. A lot of people were telling her she was wrong. Martin Luther King is another great example. He was a preacher, and baptist preachers who he had fellowship with and respected were urging him to not go on marches in advocacy of racial equality, but to leave it to the government. He had accusations and convictions and he stood up for them, and he believed he was right where others were wrong. I wouldn't call that a "holier-than-thou" attitude--I would call that bravery. You get my drift?

Salaam Alaikum

 

[Pygoscelis]

Both Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King Jr. stood up for empathy, understanding, inclusion, and tolerance. Neither of them made speaking down to others central to their cause. Add Ghandi to that list. I don't actually see how any of these people are "righteous" so much as empathic. I don't think that any of the three would have not done what they did absent their religious beliefs, although King did use it as rhetoric to put added emphasis on his point.

Now contrast to other righteous people, like Fred Phelps. He fights for what he sees as right, and stands up for the opposite of the above, for dis-empathy, exclusion and intolerance.

PS - None of these people were Muslim. Why borrow from other religions to make your point? Do we not have some muslim heroes of empathy that we can highlight on this muslim board?

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

its pretty easy to balance righteousness and mercy. you only have to think of your own sins and that would suffice for having mercy on others. if you have trouble having mercy on others, perhaps your intention isn't in the right place to begin with :hmm:

@SalaamChristian, your post brings the following statement to mind: "if you want peace, be prepared for war."

 

[missy]

I think this leads essentially to the question of how we (not just Christians, but Muslims and people from other faiths too) balance the notion of righteousness (= living a good and righteous life, following moral rules etc) and mercy (= being forgiving and compassionate towards those who fail to live righteously)?

Peace,

I feel that for any action to be accepted and thus rewarded by God, it must be done purely for His Sake, so no matter if the two commands seem paradoxical, what is more important is while doing anything we should keep in mind that we're doing it for none except Him. Once a person developes this feeling he will definetly get the Guidance of God and this will help him/her to do the right thing!!
Secondly, everything that we do should be within the guidelines of what God has commanded us and there shouldn't be any exaggeration.

Practically speaking, striking a balance might seem impossible but the word "impossible" itself says *I'M POSSIBLE*

May The Almighty God Guide all of us....Ameen

 

[missy]

I would really ask that one of our Muslim brothers respond to this question, because it is one which I have been also thinking about. I too have been wondering what the position of Muslims and the Qu'ran is on this topic.

Peace,
The Holy Quran has the following verses regarding this matter,
1)Righteousness
"Make it [the truth] known to mankind, and do not conceal it!" [Qur'an 3: 187]
"Help one another to righteousness and piety and do not help one another to sin and transgression." [Qur'an 5:2]
"Remind [others of the truth] in the event that this admonition profits. The reminder will be received by he who fears [of God]." [Qur'an 87: 9-10.]
"Verily! man is In loss, except those who believe and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another to the Truth, and recommend one another to patience. "
[Qur'an 103: 2-3]

"Nor can Goodness and Evil be equal. Repel [Evil] with what is better: then will he between whom and you was hatred become as it were your friend and intimate!​

And no one will be granted such goodness except those who exercise patience and self-restraint and none is granted it except the Owner of the great portion (of the happiness In the Hereafter i.e. Paradise and In This world of a High moral character)"
[Qur'an 41: 34-35]

​

2)Mercy

" . . . So overlook [any human faults] with gracious forgiveness. "
[Qur'an 15:85]

"…..If the debtor is in difficulty, grant him time till it is easy for him to repay…."
[Qur'an 2:280]

" ... Who restrain anger, and pardon all men - for Allah loves those who do good."
[Qur'an 3:134]

These are not all!! i might be missing out on many....but ofcourse they do convey the message

The Prophet (pbuh) also reminded people of these commands of Allah (SWT),
​

The Prophet (pbuh) said: "He who shows mercy, Allah will shower His mercy upon him. Be merciful to the people of this world so that the One above will show mercy on you." (Abu Dawud.)

The Prophet (PBUH) said:
"A man was walking along the road when he felt very thirsty. He saw a well, so he went down into it, drank his fill, then came out. He saw a dog panting and biting the dust with thirst, and said, `This dog's thirst is as severe as mine was.' So he went back down into the well, filled his shoes with water, held them in his mouth (while he climbed out), and gave the dog water. Allah (SWT) thanked him and forgave him." They asked, "O Messenger of Allah,
will we be rewarded for kindness towards animals?" He said, "In every living creature there is reward." (Bukhari and Muslim)​

"Have compassion on those who are on earth so that the One Who is in heaven will havemercy on you." (Reported by al-Tabarani)

"Whoever shoes not show compassion to people, Allah (SWT) will not show mercy to him." (Reported with a hasan isnad by al-Tabarani.)

"Compassion is not taken away except from the one who is doomed." (Reported by Bukhari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/466)
"You will not believe until you have compassion towards one another." They said, "O Messenger of Allah, all of us are compassionate." He said, "It is not the compassion of any of you towards his friend, but it is compassion towards all people and compassion towards the common folk." (Reported by al-Tabarani)

The Prophet (pbuh) also said,
"Teach and make things easy, do not make them difficult. If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent." (Reported by Bukhari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1)

"Whoever guides others to do good will have a reward like that of the person who does the good deed." (Sahih Muslim, 13/38)
​

Especially, I am wondering how holy battles like Badr would fit into this model. I know that Allah (swt) states in the Qu'ran that even those enemies which God has urged the Muslims to slay in self-defense are to be shown forgiveness if they repent and accept God. That is a very extreme example of how tense the relationship between righteousness and mercy can be.

Probably the verse u're refering to is:

( And those who, when an oppressive wrong is inflicted on them, help and defend themselves. The recompense for an injury is an injury equal thereto [in degree]: but if a person forgives and makes reconciliation, his reward is due from Allah: for Allah loves not those who do wrong. But indeed if any do help and defend themselves after a wrong [done] to them, against such is no cause of blame. The blame is only against those who oppress men with wrongdoing and insolently transgress beyond bounds through the land, defying right and justice: for such there will be a Penalty grievous. But indeed if any show patience and forgive, that would truly be an exercise of courageous will and resolution in the conduct of affairs.) (Qur'an 42:39-43)​

Definitely the battles that the Prophet (Pbuh) fought against those who rejected had a great deal of wisdom in it. These were the people who themselves started defying the Command of GOD!!
They were sooooo stubborn that they openly prosecuted the believers to an extent that people lost their lives and their near ones. An action against such behaviour was the need of the hour and also according to what God commanded.
Isn't it then justified?!?!

 

[PouringRain]

I apologize for not getting back to your thread sooner, Glo.

One thing which struck me was the author's comment that some of Jesus' instructions seemed paradoxical and very difficult to put into action together.
In particular these two:

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they shall be satisfied.
And
Blessed are the merciful,
for they shall obtain mercy.

When I read these two, I see nothing that causes a paradox that is difficult to put into action. I will explain further.

When we are told to "hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled," this statement refers to actions in our own life. It is a standard for us to aspire to on a personal level. It is not our duty to expect righteousness from others. The hunger and thirst for righteousness comes from within. Proverbs 21:21 says, "He who follows righteousness and mercy, finds life, righteousness, and honor." In Proverbs 10:3 we read, " The Lord will not suffer the soul of the righteous to famish..."

When we talk about "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy," this statement refers to our dealings with others. We are called to show mercy to others. Even though we hold our own selves to a standard of righteousness, we must recognize that each individual is at different places in their spiritual journey and we must show mercy to others in our dealings with them. One aspect of righteousness is to be merciful. Psalm 37:21 says that, "the righteous show mercy." And to he who shows mercy, God will also show him mercy. Psalm 18:25, "with the merciful, you will show yourself merciful." An example of this concept can be seen in Proverbs 14:21 & 19:17, "But he who has mercy on the poor, happy is he" & "He who has pity on the poor lends to the Lord, and He will pay back what he has given." But it is not just the poor that we must have mercy on.

I observe some people in my life, who are very good at teaching and preaching about morality and avoiding sin … but often hand in hand with that attitude goes being harsh and judgemental of others.

Then I observe other people, who are compassionate and understanding of people who act sinfully and fall short of the moral laws … sometimes so understanding that they forget to point out the mistakes and teach about moral values.


So my question is, how easy/possible is it for us to strike the right balance between teaching what is right and at the same time being compassionate towards those who get it wrong (bearing in mind that we are all in that boat, and that we all get it wrong, at least from time to time – I know I do!)?

The balance comes from recognizing that the two are not contradictory; that we must seek after righteousness in our own life, and show mercy to others. Recognizing that one part of being righteous is in being merciful.

The individuals in your first example above are often guilty of not first removing the the beam from their own eye. The very fact that they are harshly judgmental demonstrates that they have much to learn and improve in their own life.

The people in your second category are more diverse. Some of them may even fall into the trap of "we are all sinner, there is none righteous, so it's okay to live as you like." Others may not believe that way, but may have difficulty finding the balance of how to instruct others without coming off as being judgmental. And there may be some who have no desire to correct others, or who may not feel it is their place to. There may be other groups as well.

The thing is, we are called to instruct others in righteousness. Proverbs 24:11-12 says, "Deliver those who are drawn toward death, and hold back those stumbling to the slaughter. If you say, “Surely we did not know this,” Does not He who weighs the hearts consider it? He who keeps your soul, does He not know it? And will He not render to each man according to his deeds? " This passage instructs us to hold back those who we see that are headed on the path of destruction. It is our duty to stop them. To say "we did not know this" and turn a blind eye can cause judgment to come upon us for failing to perform a part of our duty. But we are not held responsible for their sin.

Matthew 18:15-16 gives instructions for how to deal with a brother who sins against you, but it is also important to note that immediately following that Jesus says in verse 22 that we should forgive him 70 times 7 times. (Mercy, anyone?) We are told how to approach a brother, but it is not mandatory that we do it. Proverbs 19:11 "man's glory is to overlook a transgression." Forgiveness and mercy are important even if we are wronged directly by someone. The parable in Matthew 18 of the man who had been forgiven a great debt, but then turned around and demanded payment fro a small debt is a good example of how we must show mercy to others, as we also have been given mercy.

One of the most important things to note is that we also must use wisdom in discerning who we speak to and how. Proverbs 9:7-9, "He who corrects a scoffer gets shame for himself, and he who rebukes a wicked man harms himself. Do not rebuke a scoffer lest he hate you. Rebuke wise men and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will still be wiser. Teach a just man and he will increase in learning." In Matthew, Jesus gave instructions for how we should approach a brother who has sinned against us. But who is our "brother"? We loosely call each other brother and sister, but the word implies a type of kinship relationship. The relationship must be there. Ideally, we should be able to go to any brother and offer correction, but problems arise when this happens, because often we know nothing about the individual. When there is a relationship in place, then you can correct the person in love and you should know the person well enough to know how to approach the subject. This is not a guarantee that the individual will listen, but it can help. If an individual is not receptive, then there comes a time to walk away.


Finally, we must always be open to instruction and correction from others. Proverbs 21:11, "when the wise are instructed, they receive knowledge." Proverbs 19:20, "Listen to counsel and receive instruction that you may be wise in your later days." If we are going to approach others with help, we must also be open to receiving that same help. When someone approaches us we should take the opportunity to examine our own life. Initially our porcupine quills might come us, but we must resist reacting in a negative manner. The individual may be wrong, but we also may be wrong when we approach others. Often what we see in others tells us more about ourselves.


If I made zero sense, then forgive me! It is 4:20 a.m. and I had no sleep this night. It was one of those insomnia nights, so I decided to take advantage of it and write this post. LOL