Hamza Asadullah
Glory be to Allah!!!
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I am in deep trouble. My faith in Allah (swt) is on shaky grounds. I am a born Muslim and was very practicing in the past. But some depressive experiences with myself and on my family and the humans around me forced me to question whether Allah really cared for me or for us .... I momentarily felt that there is no one to hear me ...
I am feeling more depressed, I cannot imagine living a life without faith ... It is so empty ... my whole existence becomes useless ... I love Allah but I have been led astray by my mind and my heart has become silent in response to the tyranny of the questions with no answers revolving in my mind ...
I just got to hear that a certain family member has passed away. needless to say, I am depressed and wondering why?? then one of my parents was supposed to go to see a doc yesterday, they didnt, I was out of town and came today and am pissed that why they didnt go because I care about their health. So i asked them why didnt you go, they replied "Allah will take care of me ... " to which I just automatically murmured that Allah did not take care of that relative, why would He take care of you .... my parents are shocked at this statement of mine and so am I ....
I need Allah back in my life .... plz help me ...
:wa:

He sustains you everyday and nourishes you. He clothes you and has given you wealth and luxurious life compared to most people in this world.
Look at what you have and look at others and you will realise how unappreciative you have become. If we were to count the favours of Allah we would be counting for ETERNITY!
It is your enemy Satan who is wanting to make you angry at the one who created you for he is you sworn enemy so will you listen to him over the one who has given you everything you can see, feel touch and hear?
You enemy Satan wants your destruction and he wants you to reject the favours of your lord. Will you listen to him over your sustainer and the one who clothes you and nourishes you?
"And Satan will say when the matter is decided: "It was Allah who gave you a promise of truth: I too promised, but I failed in my promise to you. I had no authority over you except to call you but you listened to me: then reproach not me, but reproach your own souls. I cannot listen to your cries, nor can you listen to mine." (Qur'an:14:22)
Allah wants you to return to him and be close to him and this is your opportunity for you are very lucky if only you knew.
Grab this opportunty and waste not a second more on listening to your sworn enemy who wants your destruction.
If Allah tests then he tests so that his slave can come closer to him. He tests to see if his slave will come closer to him or shaythan so will you go closer to your enemy Satan?
He only tests those who he wants closest to him so will you go further away from your lord?
He gives life and he gives death and we all have an appointed time where not even a second wil be pushed forward or backward. So do you question the fact that it was your relatives time to go? We must NEVER question Allah for taking his own creation back for he appoints us all with a fixed term which we are unaware of so will you waste a second more?
Repent to Allah and turn to him for he loves you more than you can ever comprehend. Turn to the one who has given you everything you can imagine and more. Turn to the one who will give you eternity of bliss for your little efforts in this world and then we claim he is unfair? Unfair is that we should make such little effort in this world for ETERNITY of bliss. How is that fair? 70 years of devotion = Eternity of Paradise. That equation is not fair for Allah is giving us so much more than we can EVER comprehend.
Therefore turn to Allah and you will find him most merciful. It's never too late as long as we have our souls in us and we have until our souls reach our throats to ask for forgiveness and Allah only gives the ability to repent to those of his slaves that he wants to forgive. So thank Allah abundantly and repent to him profusely and sincerely and you will find the gates of mercy open.
We are here for you so ask of us what you like and we will try our best to help you.
and Allah knows best in all matters
Here are some very beneficial articles for you:
10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith)
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners...90404-10-steps-increasing-our-iman-faith.html
30 ways the youth should spend everyday of their lives!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners...-youth-should-spend-everyday-their-lives.html
Easy Dhikr which is light on the tongue but heavy on the scales!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners...easy-dhikr-light-tongue-but-heavy-scales.html
My Daily Ibadah (worship) check!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-purification-soul/134289943-my-daily-ibadah-worship-check.html
10 steps to getting closer to Allah
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-purification-soul/134292389-10-steps-getting-closer-allah.html
Forty Very Easy, Quick & Rewarding Good Deeds for all of us to do Everyday!
http://www.islamicboard.com/worship...-rewarding-good-deeds-all-us-do-everyday.html
VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday!
http://www.islamicboard.com/worship...arding-nafl-salaahs-we-can-pray-everyday.html
Please listen these very beneficial talks:
Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA
Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 1/4]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieX7ZQtHl0s
Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 2/4]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK_2sVGMW08
Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 3/4]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpmzA2hk1Bo
Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 4/4]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km39GfL62TQ
Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - The Journey of the Soul
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAwHEXE3-n0
HARD HITTING Lecture on HELLFIRE & the Day of JUDGEMENT! يوم القيامة والجحيم
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O6L_fBk7VM
Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU
Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U
Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc
Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Sheikh Riyadh ul Haq
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE
Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo
How can we not appreciate what we have after watching this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkEBUC0APMg