By what age should a parent stop making decisions for a child?

[Darth Ultor]

I'd say by the older teenage years, the parents should start giving their children more freedom to make their own decisions so they can learn responsibilities later in life. By the age of 21, the parents, while still should be respected, should only provide advice for the children rather than make decisions except in the house. If it's the parents' house, they can make any rule they want, and the children have to obey if they want to be there. Personally, I think by the age of 21, th parents should start encouraging their children to start looking for work, earn a degree, and move out of their house.

 

[ardianto]

Just like other Indonesian parents, my parents gave me and my siblings full freedom to take decision. I am the oldest kid in family and I have one brother and two sisters.

In study, my parents chose kindergarten and elementary schools for us, but started from secondary school, we chose by ourselves. In activities, our parents gave us full freedom too. We could choose any activity that we like, even they suport us.(although in the case when I became motocross racer, my parents did not support me. So I must struggle to made money to support this hobby, but they did not forbade me).

In marriage, I and my brother chose our wives by ourselves. One of my sister married a man who chosen by herself. My another sister married a man that proposed by my mother, but my mother gave her full freedom to decide to accept or reject this man. And my mother did it because my sister was too busy with her career and always reject every man who proposed marriage, until she reached 32. In Indonesia, arranged marriage is not a common practice. Parents could propose a man or a woman to their children, but children have full freedom to decide will accept or reject.

About move out from home. Different than in America, in Indonesia this is not determined by age but by marriage. People move out from the home after getting married.