If a father refuses to give His daughters in Marriage to Suitable Men
Source : Fatawaa Islaamiyyah ,Volume 5, Pg 244-246
Fatwa by : Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih Al Uthaimeen (rahimahullaah)
Q: We are a group of girls who are sisters and we live in o*ne house, and frequently suitors for our hands from among the religious young men have been rejected; and our father is suffering from mental illness. May the judge in this situation take charge of the marriage contracts for us?
A: Yes, if the guardian refuses to give a woman in marriage to a man who is suitable in his religion and his character. This is because guardianship passes to the o*ne who comes after him among the paternal family members, the o*ne with the greatest right, then the next o*ne. And if they refused to give them in marriage, as most often happens, then the guardianship passes to the legal Judge and he gives the woman in marriage, and if the matter reaches him and he knows that her guardians refused to give her in marriage, he must give her in marriage, because he has a general guardianship, as long as no particular guardianship is present.
The scholars of Islamic Jurisprudence (Fiqh) – may Allaah have mercy o*n them – have mentioned that if the guardian repeatedly refuses appropriate suitors, he will be considered a sinner due to this and his fairness will be lost, as well as his right to guardianship. Indeed, it is recognised in the madhab of Imaam Ahmad that his right to be an Imaam will be lost, and so he may not lead the muslims in congregational prayer and this is a very serious matter.
Some people – as we have indicated earlier - refuse appropriate suitors for those whom Allaah has granted them guardianship but the girl may be shy to approach a judge in order to request that he may give her in marriage – and this situation exists at present – but she must compare between those things which promote good and those things which cause evil; which is the greater cause of evil: To remain without a husband and for this guardian to arbitrarily exercise control over her according to his mood and his whim, then when she grows older and few propose to her, he give her in marriage (to whom he wills), or to approach the Judge, with the request that he give her in marriage , especially since this is her legal right?
There is no doubt that the second choice – which is that she approach the judge and request that he give her in marriage – is preferable, because this is her right and because in approaching the judge and the Judge’s giving her in marriage there is a benefit for other girls too, because they will step forward as she has done, and because by approaching the judge, she serves as a deterrent to those wrongdoers who commit injustice against those whom Allaah has placed under their guardianship, by refusing to give them in marriage to appropriate suitors. That is to say, there are three benefits in this:
- A benefit to the woman, so that she does not remain unmarried.
- A benefit to others, if she opens up the door for the women who are waiting for someone to make the approach so that they may follow her.
- Holding in check those unjust guardians who exercise control arbitrary over their daughters or those women over whom Allah has made them guardians.
Another benefit therein is the implementation of the order of the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) who said:
"If o*ne whose religion and character pleases you proposes to you, then marry (your daughters to) him. If you do not do so, it will be a cause of trial (fitnah and great corruption) in the land"
[At-Tirmidhi no. 1084]
There is o*ne other particular benefit, which is the fulfillment of the desires of those suitors who propose to women and who are suitable with regard to their religion and character.
