Depression ,how to understand it better

[muslimah_B]

Chemical imbalances occur in every single one of us.

Some more than others, but it's the way we look at it. My point is that it's very easy to "give in" to a diagnosis, you can either let it totally take control of your life and feel victimised by it, or you can take a step back and see it as something than can be worked with/on, with many possibilities of keeping such symptoms at bay, or to completely remove them. And ultimately being grateful and thankful is a major step towards being able to do that.

You think I'm not talking from experience and being judgemental?

We all face many situations in our lives that test our patience, our strength, and the tests come down on us hard, to the point where we feel like we're incapable of making it through. As muslims we understand this is part of our existence on earth. We all suffer experiences where we can feel "traumatised" by it, there is nothing new here. We're all constantly in the same boat always, but because of our selfish nature we just cannot see that we're all in this together.
What we feel is shared, it's global, these feelings have existed since the beginning of our creation, the structure has remained the same. But what has changed? The perception of it. And THAT'S what I'm trying to say here. We've been mollycoddled over the generations to fall victim to these "chemical imbalances" and whatever else the doctor orders. It's part of the system. Do you not see it?
True there are some illnesses where (as of yet) there are no cures for, some illnesses which aren't really illnesses at all, they're disabilities where the brain is not wired in the same way as everyone elses, SubhanAllah. I refuse to talk about myself and my personal experiences with a range of all of these, but the conclusions I have reached on my journey make sense to me. I cannot agree with the majority in this thread because of it.

It really is mind over matter, there is no room for this perspective and the belief in our inability to "function" in islam due to such categorised mental illnesses. Practicing muslims or non practicing muslims, you do not know what is in their heart, but God has given us every possible example over the history of time to understand that there is nothing to feel negative about, for His Promise is Ever True. Stop feeling victimised, stop making up excuses for yourself, stop blaming the diagnosis and take control because we are absolutely capable of it. Insha'Allah.

~LV

Dear sis

While i understand and appreciate your point of view but i disagree with the ease of "giving in" nobody wants to be deppressed and feel as they do, where all the things in life that once made them joyous and happy now dont even interest them no more, things people do on a daily basis even small little things become massive hurdles to overcome and ultimately seem impossible and terrifying. Being deppressed does not happen overnight and when left unsupported can be very serious for the person.

Its not about feeling victimised, deppression can be the brains/bodys way of reacting to such traumatic experiences that in a sense it just shuts down to prevent further pain, we have even heard of the brain "hiding" memories of traumatic experiences, these feelings and emotions are mentioned in the Quran with Allah telling us to keep patience and the help of Allah will come, that Allah knows how we feel. (Any person who is going through alot will rather hear these words than "victim" "self inflicted" "attention seeking" "mind over matter" they need to feel that there is hope, and that hope is trying ones absolute best to hold onto the rope of Allah.

I dont feel that being deppressed shows any nature of selfishness, as i said its a human trait to react to a traumatic experience in such a significant way that to an outsider looking in has "given up" or "playing the victim card" or being selfish everyone reacts differently and maybe the experience is so overwhelming for them.

Sister if you have been through deppression for whatever reasons then you would understand that it is not easy to just say well mind over matter I'm going to get better, some people have been so traumatised by situations in their life that is has scarred them for life and so overwhelming they dont understand, they dont know what to do, does it mean they are ungrateful to Allah ? no it doesn't its just how they cope.

You cant say we are all in this together if in essense you are looking down on those who need alot of support to just get through the day because they're playing the victim and not thinking "mind over matter" while i appreciate that some people may "snap out of it" others do not and have deep issues on the inside that nobody would even know about untill you spoke to them and understood their situation.
We are all built differently alhamdulilah, we all react to differently to situations, that's why maybe your approach may not be good for some people but may work for others, we cant put everybody into the same catogory and expect good outcomes.

Some people need so much support in order to accept things and move on and not let it be their thundery cloud that follows them everywhere, it doesnt mean the pain stops for them but it means theyre able to function better at their daily lives.

Im speaking from experience, i know what I'm capable of doing and what im not while others may look down on me or think things, because its so easy for them to do it and i at the time could not,
so who is the ungratefull one the person who doesnt appreciate being able to do the most basic of tasks, or the one who acknowledges what they can do and is so gratefull they are even able to do that, compared to a time they didnt think anything of it and just done it.

Sadness and happiness it is a human trait, we are not robots where we can suppress how we are made to feel by situations, but without sadness we would never fully appreciate the happy times we have in our lives.

I have experienced it whilst being a non muslim and being a muslim and both are totally different depths of feelings and emotions, being non muslim you are totally shut out and alone, being muslim yes you are alone physically BUT once you realise what life is like without Allah whilst muslim you push yourself to never be without Allah even through the pain.

Hence why I was saying that there needs to be more support within the muslim community with people suffering from truamatic experiences, to talk to and always get islamic advice and support, to always be reminded that no matter how you feel Allah knows it and just wants you to turn to him constantly and with time by the will of Allah it will get easier to bare bit by bit

When i tried i was judged, but i couldnt help any of the circumstances or situations that led me there, so i gave up talking to people and suffered in silence and got worse. The only thing that has been helping me is islam and Allah, sure i have my off days more than most people but im human and accept that, is it my fault no its not, it becomes my fault when i turn away from Allah and let go of the rope

Ofcourse the cure to deppression is islam and Allah but its how to get that person to be able to take on board and realise this, they wont know the difference between being deppressed and alone and being deppressed and having Allah to turn to untill they try hence need constant support and reminders of Allah.

(Sorry for the long essay )

 

[noraina]

Depression is a normal human response when something bad in life happens. It's fair to say every person has experienced depression, but the severity of the circumstance or how they cope with it differs hugely.

A Muslim with strong faith can fall victim to depression, and it doesn't mean they are low on iman. It is so natural to feel upset when something in life happens which affects you, we are human after all, we are not insensitive to pain. When we have physical pain, we cry. When our soul is hurting, those tears are manifested in depression.

I don't even think it is weakness or being ungrateful. Depression is when Allah swt sends us a trial, and sometimes we find it so difficult it can overwhelm our thoughts. I support the cognitive-behavioural theory of depression, if you look it up. Depression occurs because of irrational thinking, when some people take a negative experience and it overwhelms their every thought that they start to feel this negativity in every aspect of their lives. And it's primary treatment would be in addressing and changing these thoughts - for a Muslim understanding Allah swt only wants the best for them and there is some goodness in this, and sometimes you need someone to remind you and help you realise this.

Not everyone will fall depressed following a traumatic event, and not everyone who is depressed has gone through something traumatic - there are so many contributing factors which can pre-dispose a person to depression, Muslim or not, so when it comes to depression we can't make sweeping generalisations.

When it comes to what us Muslims can do for our brothers and sisters facing depression, just be there to listen and let them know they're not alone, because Allah swt is with them. Sometimes that can be enough.

 

[T L]

Your views are appreciated.

Support should be accessible either way within our communities for everyone, infact depression aside people just do not care enough anymore about each other. There is no real compassion or any level of empathy, everyone lives for themselves. These aren't sweeping statements or generalisations, we really are all in the same boat. We, over time, have become more and more selfish. We talk alot, but little do we actually do, then expect a great deal in return when we hit a low. OR we give and we give and little do we receive when we need it, and those individuals suffer the worst blow of it. This problem is global within our ummah, if this disease of selfishness was eradicated within our hearts, people who suffer from named illneses wouldn't feel as isolated or their illness would not affect them as badly. It's a vicious cycle. The Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings be upon him said: "None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself." [al-Bukhari, Muslim]

You fly as high as you let yourself, but you sink as low as the lowest view you have of yourself. I still firmly believe in all I've said and I come with the best of intentions. We have failed each other, it's time to take our responsibility of each other seriously and cut out all the poisons which affect us all, and not just us individually. We are one body.

May Allah ease all that burdens us and removes that which stands in our way before Him. Ameen

Stand up firm and strong because God has honoured us with Islam. Allahu Akbar.

~LV

 

[Umm Abed]

You should practise what you preach, right on this very forum.

@LV.

 

['abd al-hakeem]

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[Arfa]

Assalamualaikum,

The point that is trying to be emphasised here is that depressed people shouldnot be alienated from majority and provided a support system they can rely on.As Muslims it is our social responsibility to feel the troubles of others and not be so engrossed in our own troubles and issues that we forget to look elsewhere for those in need of help.Disengagement with ones fellow Muslim brother and sister is not very islamic to say simply as we should tune into needs of others as well which makes a responsible citizen whole .