Family Fight - Everyone Vs. Me

[StayHumble]

I got into a big fight with my family this morning. I woke up to the sound of music blasting in the basement and I am all the way upstairs. We have a computer that has big speakers and my sisters love to blast music all the time. I told them that since music is haram (based on the information I have received and people I have spoken to) I asked them to not blast it but to use their Ipods instead, and they have refused. This quickly turned into a huge argument everyone screaming at the top of their lungs, including me I wont lie.

They told me that if they are doing haram, it doesn't affect me. But the thing is Music is very catchy, repetitive and gets stuck in your head, how can I focus on Quran or reading when music is blasting in my head. My family says put your headphones on and listen to Quran but why can't they put their Ipods on and listen to music. They say that I am being unreasonable and that I can't force religion on them. I read a hadith once that said that if you see an evil change it with your hands if not speak out against it and if not hate it in your heart. So I told them that If they blast music I will simply come down and turn it off with my own hands.

This erupted into an even bigger fight, I don't think that I am in the wrong, Music is haram and they want to blast it and I can't stand hearing it. I said that I would blast Quran and they said they would blast their music right back. Why can't they just listen to it on their Ipods it was made for that reason. They tell me to listen to my quran on my headphones but shouldn't it be the other way around? I can't believe that something as stupid as music is making such a big deal, Am I in the right? or am I in the Wrong?

 

[Cabdullahi]

....just relax and be calm what you need to do is negotiate here tell them nicely that you want to read quran and that it would help if they lowered the sound levels

 

[AlHoda]

I think you're right, music is haram. Have you tried talking to your parents first, then advising them to talk to your sisters

 

[Raaina]

Why don't you come to an agreement such as when you are both in the house, you both use headphones if you want to listen to Music or Qu'ran.

 

[AhmadibnNasroon]

This issue is greater than the issue of music. It has more to do with commanding the good and forbidding the evil. InshaAllah I will try to post some articles on it. May Allah give you strength ameen.

 

[IslamicRevival]

I understand where you are coming from as i have been in a similar position. Ive been in many a argument over issues like these and ive said many things which i regret later on. Its pointless as no ones a winner at the end of it and it causes friction and disunity

Best thing to do is hate it in your heart and let it go. Do dua and ask Allah SWT to guide your family and yourself. If your dua is accepted, you will see the affect InshAllah

May Allah SWT forgive us and guide us all. Ameen

 

[Alpha Dude]

I agree with Troubled Soul. The thing is, they don't show the concern for Islam to begin with. They have a more deep rooted problem than just music. Your goal ought to be to guide them toward wanting to be better muslims. If you can somehow do that, then things like music will follow because they will be more receptive to staying away from sin and would genuinely yearn to be better.

 

[Italianguy]

oh no they must be listening to that Rap crapimsad

When they sleep just download Qur'anic music to their Itunes and put it on their Ipods;D Hey they may like it

No offense or anything

 

[zakirs]

oh no they must be listening to that Rap crap

I hate rap too :| ..


@thread poster



brother please calm down ,once it settles down at home too take your sisters for a nice snack at a icecream shop and treat them. Once they stop complaning put your trap .. negotiate with them that they use low volume because you cant concentrate. Putup a cute face .. and i hope it will be solved

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

I got into a big fight with my family this morning. I woke up to the sound of music blasting in the basement and I am all the way upstairs. We have a computer that has big speakers and my sisters love to blast music all the time. I told them that since music is haram (based on the information I have received and people I have spoken to) I asked them to not blast it but to use their Ipods instead, and they have refused. This quickly turned into a huge argument everyone screaming at the top of their lungs, including me I wont lie.

They told me that if they are doing haram, it doesn't affect me. But the thing is Music is very catchy, repetitive and gets stuck in your head, how can I focus on Quran or reading when music is blasting in my head. My family says put your headphones on and listen to Quran but why can't they put their Ipods on and listen to music. They say that I am being unreasonable and that I can't force religion on them. I read a hadith once that said that if you see an evil change it with your hands if not speak out against it and if not hate it in your heart. So I told them that If they blast music I will simply come down and turn it off with my own hands.

This erupted into an even bigger fight, I don't think that I am in the wrong, Music is haram and they want to blast it and I can't stand hearing it. I said that I would blast Quran and they said they would blast their music right back. Why can't they just listen to it on their Ipods it was made for that reason. They tell me to listen to my quran on my headphones but shouldn't it be the other way around? I can't believe that something as stupid as music is making such a big deal, Am I in the right? or am I in the Wrong?

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, My brother use wisdom and tact in these issues because anger will only make the situation worse although it is a very frustrating situation you should remain patient as your reward is with Allah!

You should call a meeting of the family to discuss these matters properly as a family unit. If need be get an elder/s of the family to mediate such matters so that you can come to a mutal agreement.

You should make your family aware that music is forbidden and that there is no reason for your sisters to put the volume up so loud so tat the whole house and neighbours can hear it. You should let them no that it is really upsetting you that they act in this way and that there is no need for them to put the volume up so loud as they can hear it just aswell in a lower volume.

You should try to be tolerant and patient with your sisters and show them good character so that they may see the beauty of islam and how it has made you a better person. Remember that the best dawah is a persons good character and manners.

Create good relations with them as Islam maintains that we keep good relations with kith and kin. Creating good relations will make your dawah for them to come into Islam much more effective.

Whenever you have the opportunity read them a few hadith or an ayat from the Qur'an with its meaning. Talk to them about death, th grave punishment and the hereafter as this would bring them back to reality.

Death is the destroyer of pleasure so make them realise that they will return to Allah and how will they answer for thier deeds? What have they prepared for the hereafter? Talking about death will often make them think. Make them realise that the time they are wasting will never return and that they should think about death and thew hereafter. Also text them weekly reminders as well.

Know that we can only inform them best we can for Allah is the ONLY one who can guide them. Always use wisdom and tact and never get frustrated and angry as this will never work.

Most of all make lots of dua for them that Allah guides them towards Islam.

Here are some brilliant talks that you can make them listen to. The first is about the evils of the hip hop culture. Then there are short clips about the realities of death, the grave, hell and the hereafter as well as the importance of Salah. These talks will certainly open their eyes to reality inshallah:


The Evil Of The Hip-Hop Culture by Abu Shahadah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DdKbLckjeU


Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 1/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieX7ZQtHl0s

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 2/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK_2sVGMW08

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 3/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpmzA2hk1Bo

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 4/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km39GfL62TQ

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - The Journey of the Soul

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAwHEXE3-n0

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc

Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - The Importance of Prayer (Salat)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNDb41OH46A

Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Shaykh Riyadh ul Haq

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE

Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo