[anonymous]

Salaams.

I launched a business many years back & was the first one in the area to do this business. Although people could still get this service from many others around the country, they all loved my work, the unique way I did it & the quality, as well as the fact that I was a local Muslim.
I was very successful (for ME anyway & what I expected - it surpassed all my expectations) & everyone was talking about me. If anyone ever needed this service, people would recommend me only.

Recently in the last year another local Muslim has started doing the same business. I wasn't troubled by this at first, I was happy to see someone else I could relate to & felt there was enough room for both of us.

But since then all my customers have dried up, people who's friends & family would have usually come to me after recommendations were now going to this other business, I can see on social media that they are all supporting this business too & even people who approached me first with initial enquiries would then go on to give the other business their custom instead.

It's now got to the point where I can't help but feel totally disheartened, depressed & upset about the situation, & yes even jealous to some extent. I know I am already doing the best I can to my ability, there are some things I've planned to do to improve further, but I hate the feeling of having to compete with THEM when I was very happy so far just doing the best I could. It's tiring to try and compete with someone else rather than do it for yourself. It's not healthy.

I recently approached this other business in the hope of starting a friendly business relationship or even just exchange a couple of pleasantries, as I thought it might help counteract my feelings & it is always better to be friendly competition rather than be strangers. I told them how much I admired their work, talking about it in industry terms about all the different aspects involved & how nice it is to see someone else in the same industry - which is all true. They replied back very curtly simply saying thanks with nothing else & didn't acknowledge the fact that I do the same work at all, which left me feeling quite bruised & didn't help the feelings I had been having. If they had replied in a nicer way I'm sure it would have helped tremendously with my feelings. They didn't need to compliment my work if they don't like it, but they were quite rude by saying nothing else at all & not even acknowledging it.

I don't really know what to do now. I try not to look at their social network pages or seek out wether people are going to them instead of me, however all of this continuously makes it way to me as when people like, comment or share their work I see it, people talk about them around me, I can't help but notice when local people employ them, especially if they've enquired with me first or I have connections with these people personally.

I feel a lot of anxiety at times & like a failure. I want to go back to how it was before in my heart & mind when I didn't run my business with them in mind, wether it's as successful or not. I can try to find more custom elsewhere rather than just local (even though this hurts my business the most as local custom is the best business for me) & can to some extent accept the fact that they prefer them, but it's the way it makes me FEEL that bothers me the most. I want to rid the feelings of failure, upset, anxiety and the feelings of jealousy which I hate the most.

Please can someone advise on how I can overcome the feelings.

 

[h-n]

Let's go back to test, when your having a harder time, it means that you get more reward in the hereafter.

Satan wishes people to be pushed into a corner and then whisper to them, and make it fair seeming onto them on what they should do, make it look like they don't have any route in this world, don't know what to do. They don't think that if they have the means to be evil, then surely they have the means to be good.

Now it is starting from the wrong footing, what is business and work about? It is about being able to provide for yourself and help others and being able to give the poor their due. As long as you try and aim to do that and be content with it, then that is all you need to do in terms of work. It isn't about showing off, it isn't about being unhappy that other people are also making their living, even if they are working in the same field, how can you truly be a charitable person if you are not happy with someone having what you have for yourself?? That is basic of charity and kindness to others, that you are happy that other people do well regardless if it is of no benefit to you. Charity is giving without asking for anything in return.

What you need to do is to reassess now where you are in your business, what you can do to help it to continue and if that doesn't work out then do something else, it can be hard-but don't be like those people who even feel unhappy about their whole lives because of one thing. Don't devalue what God gave you to how successful your business is. This is not the value of you.

Pray to God, and read the Quran regularly-even if it be a sentence. Read Surah Al-Waqia (Surah number 56) to help against poverty. Its harder when your faced with working on your own, but remember after these periods of difficulty, this is what you will be most pleased with when you are in the next world, not that you had ice cream and popcorn, but the difficulties you faced where your better moments.

Remember Allah and the Day of Judgement much.

 

[ardianto]

Wa'alaikumsalam

I have competed in dozens sport competitions, mostly were motorcycle racing. There are many lessons that I've learned from my experiences. Here, one important lesson.

"No matter how much your competitors, no matter in which position you are, always focus to yourself. Focus to do what you must do properly and avoid make mistake. If you lose your position because another racer overtake you, control your emotion, and still focus. If you lose your focus, then you will make mistake that not only can make you waste your time, but also can make you get accident".

I've left racing since long time ago, and then I start my career in business. I've become businessman for more than 20 years. Of course I've learned many thing about business, and here one important lesson.

"Business is different than sport competition. The goal of sport competition is to win the position, while the goal of business is to win the customer's heart. In business, do not ever thinking to be better than other companies, but always think to be the best in the customer's heart".

In business, do not ever thinking to win the competition with other companies because it can make us take action that can destroy ourselves. In example, launch 'discount war' that will make our profit margin too thin to cover the operational cost.

There are many companies that have collapsed due to their ambition to defeat the competitors. Different than companies that still focus to main goal, win the customer's heart. They chose to maintain and improve their service. So they can survive, and even develop.

Anonymous poster, I notice, in this case you are thinking like a racer who lose his position because another racer overtake him. It makes you panic and lose your self-control. Seem like you start make mistakes.

So what you must do now is control your emotion, and focus to what you should in manage your business. Do not thinking about your position, do not let the feeling that you have been defeated disturb your mind.

But the most important is realize that you are in business, not in sport competition. Your goal is not to defeat your 'competitor', but to win the customer's heart. So, throw away the feeling that you have to compete with that company, and start focus only to your business.

Try to evaluate what make your customers leave you. Try to find the way how to make you get more customers and how to make them always loyal to you. Ignore about that company have more customers than you. Remember, you are not in sport competition.

Okay, I will tell you something that In Shaa Allah, can relieve your defeated feeling. Not everyone see the 'winner' as the best. I know it from my experience when I was active in competition. I never won any race!, but there were always spectators who saw me as the best. I knew it from their appreciation to me. That's why I never felt as the loser.

Now, I am not on the top in business. There are few other companies that have more sales than my company. But there are customers who see my company as the best. That's why they always come to my company, not to the other. It makes me grateful and motivates me to always be the best in the customers heart.