Fighting with depression

[syed1]

iv'e only read the above post here , but sister, very pleased to hear things are looking optimistic for you. Inshallah they get even better!

 

[Abdul-Raouf]

I had a different type of eating disorder... which now has reduced a lot... which has reduced my weight as well.
My work.. is not the ordinary shift.. its like used to reach home mostly past dinner time.
Its majority nonmuslims there in my work place.. its very rare to find a muslim(meaning by his look).

I have heard people friends(nonmuslims).. saying its a tough day at work man..come lets drink tonight... and some often go for smoking to relax the pressure...I avoid mingling with them.. the corporate parties... u know how it goes.. i was fortunate to find some of my colleagues.. who dont drink.. so i stand with them and try to move out asap...after jus eating.

Being in this kinda environment... and i was into a project.. which had weekend work as well.. ur mind will be always occupied with work... what happened was.. after.. end of the day when i tell my house that.. i will eat and come.. and most of the time eat heavy - meaning Non-Veg.. Biryanis.. Chicken curries etc... It was as if that eating was my entertainment... mind was like - I am earning .. wat else is our enjoyment.. nothing .. eating is halal... though i dont eat too much.. i was eating the heavier ones/high priced .

But now Alhamdulillah... I have reduced it.. especially after this Ramadhan .. Usually i gain weight during Ramadhan... this time was the first time i lost. (not with the intention that i need to reduce my weight .. but i realised that i should eat much in this month.. to feel the hunger)

So it was a different kinda eating disorder.. the opposite of the OP... to a max extent i can say it was due to the work life.

 

[bintYahya]

Eating disorders aren't easy to deal with but I think a believer can greatly benefit from his or her faith. Which is why we're lucky, if that's a correct way to put it. Blessed, perhaps?

 

[bintYahya]

Alhamdulillah again.

And Allahu akbar!

Because of the progress I've made in these 5 months I feel better than ever. It's quite amazing, and I keep thinking how stupid I was for not believing that life can be enjoyable. But the past is in the past and I can't change it, I have to focus on the now. I've found so many aspects of myself and I have been able to get rid of some of the feelings and thoughts of endless self-hatred. I've discovered my spirituality in a wider perspective, in a deeper way. I could say I love myself and I love my life. Now I have more energy and capacity to try to get closer to Allah, in sha' Allah.

During the Christmas break I worked full-time at a nursing home for elderly people. I was very nervous going into the interview but ma sha' Allah, I was hired - knowing that I would be wearing the hijab, praying as necessary, and so on. I was nervous with new people while working but they welcomed me and I felt very good knowing that they didn't judge me in a way that I've felt before - and even then maybe just because of depression. I enjoyed my two weeks at the nursing home, I was able to make the old people laugh and joke around with them. There were a few moments when I just suddenly had this peaceful feeling, and I thought I had at least to some extent accepted myself as who I am.

And a bit of an OT:

There was an Atheist man. He was paralyzed but not completely. He was quite angry at the world and hated his life which is understandable given his lack of faith in God. He was a bit mean to me at first but I was told that's how he is with everyone, always. However, I stopped to listen to him. He was interested because I had the scarf but he thought I was a Christian nun. I jokingly told him I belong to the death cult that oppresses women because I sensed he had that kind of a sense of humor, that it might make him think. Later I found out he didn't really know anything about Islam. We had several discussions about justification for his condition and other deep stuff and he was actually in a loss of words after hearing my explanations of the mercy in Islam. He started respecting me for sharing these thoughts with him and seeing that these things really struck him I started praying to God that this man could find the light. Unfortunately, however, I haven't had any shifts after I suggested I could bring him something to read.

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Alhamdulillah again.

And Allahu akbar!

Because of the progress I've made in these 5 months I feel better than ever. It's quite amazing, and I keep thinking how stupid I was for not believing that life can be enjoyable. But the past is in the past and I can't change it, I have to focus on the now. I've found so many aspects of myself and I have been able to get rid of some of the feelings and thoughts of endless self-hatred. I've discovered my spirituality in a wider perspective, in a deeper way. I could say I love myself and I love my life. Now I have more energy and capacity to try to get closer to Allah, in sha' Allah.

During the Christmas break I worked full-time at a nursing home for elderly people. I was very nervous going into the interview but ma sha' Allah, I was hired - knowing that I would be wearing the hijab, praying as necessary, and so on. I was nervous with new people while working but they welcomed me and I felt very good knowing that they didn't judge me in a way that I've felt before - and even then maybe just because of depression. I enjoyed my two weeks at the nursing home, I was able to make the old people laugh and joke around with them. There were a few moments when I just suddenly had this peaceful feeling, and I thought I had at least to some extent accepted myself as who I am.

And a bit of an OT:

There was an Atheist man. He was paralyzed but not completely. He was quite angry at the world and hated his life which is understandable given his lack of faith in God. He was a bit mean to me at first but I was told that's how he is with everyone, always. However, I stopped to listen to him. He was interested because I had the scarf but he thought I was a Christian nun. I jokingly told him I belong to the death cult that oppresses women because I sensed he had that kind of a sense of humor, that it might make him think. Later I found out he didn't really know anything about Islam. We had several discussions about justification for his condition and other deep stuff and he was actually in a loss of words after hearing my explanations of the mercy in Islam. He started respecting me for sharing these thoughts with him and seeing that these things really struck him I started praying to God that this man could find the light. Unfortunately, however, I haven't had any shifts after I suggested I could bring him something to read.

Mashallah were very happy for you sister. You will have ups and downs but as long as your put your trust, reliance and faith in Allah then NOTHING will ever fet you down because you will know that Allah is with you as he is close to those who are patient.

There are many of us who go through depression at some point or another in their lives. May I ask sister that you give advice to anyone reading this who maybe going through depression right now as to how they can also overcome sadness and depression from they're lives.

 

[Who Am I?]

Good to hear, bintYahya.

I am going to talk to a counselor on Monday about my depression and self-esteem issues.

 

[Scimitar]

In the times of happiness and peace - prepare for the bad times that are ahead...

In the times of grief and worry, be patient - for the period of peace is ahead.

Assalaam Alaikum waRahmatullahi waBarakatuhu

Alhamdulillah again.

And Allahu akbar!

Because of the progress I've made in these 5 months I feel better than ever. It's quite amazing, and I keep thinking how stupid I was for not believing that life can be enjoyable. But the past is in the past and I can't change it, I have to focus on the now. I've found so many aspects of myself and I have been able to get rid of some of the feelings and thoughts of endless self-hatred. I've discovered my spirituality in a wider perspective, in a deeper way. I could say I love myself and I love my life. Now I have more energy and capacity to try to get closer to Allah, in sha' Allah.

Thus starts the period of peace. Sister, I just wanted to say two things here.

1) Remember that during the time of peace, you must plan for the period of hardship. So recognize the reasons and the patterns that manifest within the self that take you down this road where you are unable to keep a healthy appetite. So if these signs start to manifest again, you can get ahead of them, before they get a hold of you.

2) Now that you are feeling much better Alhamdulillah - I suggest you pray 2 rakat Nafl (supplemetary) salah to Allah to show HIM how sincerely happy you are that HE saved you, again.

That is all,

Scimi

 

[bintYahya]

There are many of us who go through depression at some point or another in their lives. May I ask sister that you give advice to anyone reading this who maybe going through depression right now as to how they can also overcome sadness and depression from they're lives.

In sha' Allah, I'll write something but I want to put more thought into it in order to provide a more comprehensive view, so I'll post it in a few days.

I am going to talk to a counselor on Monday about my depression and self-esteem issues.

May Allah help you every step of the way. It's not easy. It helps if you turn to Allah.

Thus starts the period of peace. Sister, I just wanted to say two things here.

1) Remember that during the time of peace, you must plan for the period of hardship. So recognize the reasons and the patterns that manifest within the self that take you down this road where you are unable to keep a healthy appetite. So if these signs start to manifest again, you can get ahead of them, before they get a hold of you.

2) Now that you are feeling much better Alhamdulillah - I suggest you pray 2 rakat Nafl (supplemetary) salah to Allah to show HIM how sincerely happy you are that HE saved you, again.

1) I have an amazing ability for self-assessment. With my therapist, the aim has always been to work through the problems and find alternatives that last through storms. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy has offered a model to build a solid base that supports me in this quite unknown territory of better life. I do have the constant fear of regression but succeeding in situations that have caused a lot of anxiety before and seeing that I haven't turned to my old habits, be it thoughts or behaviors, I have gained a lot of courage to think otherwise, against my fear.

2) In sha' Allah, I will pray but nothing will ever be enough to show Him how grateful I am. I remember those moments of desperation that lead me into terrible acts against myself and how He always saved me. Why me? And like He says, there is no escape from Him. I cried my eyes out time and time again and regretted things I had done but I was in a dark and vicious cycle I thought I'd be stuck in forever. But something changed and here I am!

Please, be patient and I will try to write something that will be of benefit for those suffering from major depression or other similar problems, in sha' Allah.

 

[ILuvAllah]

oh I have self esteem issues. I dont love myself at all but I'm not depressed cause I know Allah loves me immensely. I have full faith in Him. I know someday I'd be able to love myself and everything would improve InshAllah cause I know Allah is with me always Alhamdulillah Allah gives me much strength than I could ever imagine Alhamdulillah. Allahu Akbar.

Whenever I feel low, I know something is missing. So I increase my dhikr and worship and everything gets better Alhamdulillah

 

[Scimitar]

Please, be patient and I will try to write something that will be of benefit for those suffering from major depression or other similar problems, in sha' Allah.

Alhamdulillah sister. You are already providing beneficial words and advice to others who may be in similar circumstances to what you once suffered. :statisfie

Scimi

 

[serena77]

sister I do feel for you. Brother Yusuf has a lot of good advise... i've been through the depression issue myself but i have bipolar disorder so i can't ever ever ever take an anti depressant... but i do take mood stablizers while i understand being against medications, they can also be a life saver.

I suffer from a lot of what brother Yusuf said his wife does plus add aspergers syndrome. Its not easy.. I know its not... I will tell you for me... even at my most manic if i can settle down and make my prayers it helps. It doesn't "fix" it... but i do feel better .. more centered... the racing thoughts slowing down SOME. Everyone is different.. listening to Nasheeds might help i love them... I try and get lost in their meaning. I'm a revert also ...

and while my family knows about the mental issues they don't know that i've reverted... and I know they try and be understanding... (shakes head ) its one of the reasons I'm convinced I'll never marry... most people can't handle some of those side issues ( plus my mother doesn't want me to.. )...

hang in there sister. Know we are here for you.. pray for assistance...
Serena

 

[~Zaria~]

Assalamu-alaikum brothers and sisters,

Alhamdulillah, the advices given above are most beautiful to read, and I do hope that our sister finds benefit from them insha Allah.

Indeed, there are medical causes for these psychological conditions (I am in a medical field, and I see these types of problems from time to time as well), and so we can not dismiss this either.

And subhanAllah, there is not a disease that exists in this dunya, but Allah, most Kind, most Loving, most Wise - has sent down a cure for it.
We may not be aware of the cures for all diseases at this given point in time, but insha Allah - with time, this ummah will blessed with the knowledge of these as well.

So, even though we may have strong, unwavering belief and trust in Allah (subhanawata'ala), it is still our duty to seek out the benefit which He has bestowed onto medical advances, as you are correctly doing, my dear sister.
Alhamdulillah.

In addition to this, I would like to share a short booklet to ALL who are afflicted by depression.

For, without doubt, many cases of depression today, stem from being DISPLEASED with our current situation/ condition in life.

And insha Allah, you will learn from my late, beloved Sheikh Yunus Patel - that, there is no question of depression in these cases - if only we learn how to adopt TAFWEEZ - RESIGNING yourself to the decisions of Allah (subhanawata'ala).

"Tafweez is placing our matters before Allah Ta’ala, handing them over to Him, and trusting completely in Him, believing that there is goodness in whatever Allah Ta’ala has decided.
Outwardly, it may appear as if there is some problem that we are faced with, but great wisdom lies in the decisions of Allah."


View attachment Tafweez.pdf


For those going through trials and tribulations in life......who feel depressed and a sense of hopelessness - please take the time to read this booklet, and insha Allah, you will find as much confort in its words as I did.

Salaam

 

[Scimitar]

There is this really good book you can download called "Don't Be Sad" by Aaidh ibn Abdullah Al Qarni. Here's the link for the download:

http://www.kalamullah.com/Books/Dont%20Be%20Sad.pdf

Scimi

 

[Who Am I?]

Well I had my first session of therapy today. Nothing mind-breaking, but we have to figure out what my issues are before we can fix them.