muslim brother
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EIGHT ADMONITIONS
from al ghazallis...dear beloved son
Among these [eight admonitions], you have to do four of them and you do not do four of them so that your knowledge does not become your enemy on the Day of Judgment. First, those four things will be mentioned that you should not do.
1. PRINCIPLES OF DEBATE
Firstly, as much as it’s possible you should not have [religious] debates with everyone and do not argue with anyone on any [religious or non-religious] issue because there are many [hidden] calamities (harms) in it and has more harms than benefits.
This work (debates and arguments) is the fountainhead (source) of all evil things such as ostentation (show off/Riya), jealousy, arrogance, resentment, enmity, pride, egoism, etc.
If an argument starts between you and someone else [about an issue] and you desire the truth to prevail then your intention to argue in this matter is said to be correct.
In this regards, there are two indications (signs) of your right intentions:
First [indication] is that, if truth is revealed from either your tongue or from the tongue of the opponent, it makes no difference to you.
In other words, you are satisfied (content) in both cases that the truth has been revealed.
Second indication [of your right intention] is that you consider it better to argue on this [issue with your opponent] in solitude [and not in front of an audience].
But if you argue [or debate] on an issue and if you are certain that you are correct and the opponent is only arguing [for the sake of arguing] then you beware and do not argue with him/her and end your discussion right at that point otherwise grudges [and resentments] will born out of this and no benefit [whatsoever] will be achieved.
we strive for win /win scenarios
not win/lose
if someone loses heart due to our words or actions
then what victory is that
but a shameful defeat
from al ghazallis...dear beloved son
Among these [eight admonitions], you have to do four of them and you do not do four of them so that your knowledge does not become your enemy on the Day of Judgment. First, those four things will be mentioned that you should not do.
1. PRINCIPLES OF DEBATE
Firstly, as much as it’s possible you should not have [religious] debates with everyone and do not argue with anyone on any [religious or non-religious] issue because there are many [hidden] calamities (harms) in it and has more harms than benefits.
This work (debates and arguments) is the fountainhead (source) of all evil things such as ostentation (show off/Riya), jealousy, arrogance, resentment, enmity, pride, egoism, etc.
If an argument starts between you and someone else [about an issue] and you desire the truth to prevail then your intention to argue in this matter is said to be correct.
In this regards, there are two indications (signs) of your right intentions:
First [indication] is that, if truth is revealed from either your tongue or from the tongue of the opponent, it makes no difference to you.
In other words, you are satisfied (content) in both cases that the truth has been revealed.
Second indication [of your right intention] is that you consider it better to argue on this [issue with your opponent] in solitude [and not in front of an audience].
But if you argue [or debate] on an issue and if you are certain that you are correct and the opponent is only arguing [for the sake of arguing] then you beware and do not argue with him/her and end your discussion right at that point otherwise grudges [and resentments] will born out of this and no benefit [whatsoever] will be achieved.
we strive for win /win scenarios
not win/lose
if someone loses heart due to our words or actions
then what victory is that
but a shameful defeat