Having second wife

[RRahman]

Assalamualaikum!
I'm going through some tough times in my life. We are 3 sisters and I'm the oldest. I'm almost 30 years old and not married. Although I'm making the effort to look for my potential spouse unfortunately it's been challenging. Due to this my father is extremely frustrated with us including my mom and blaming her that it is her fault for not raising us well and none of us sisters are interested in marriage. He thinks we are just bunch of failures and thats why he wants to marry again to have more children. My mother took it into heart and got really upset and sick after hearing this from her husband.
Me and my other sister also helped our father financially to buy house and I also give him monthly allowance to help him pay off our mortgage. Please help me understand does Islam actually allow 2nd marriage in this situation?

Thank you for your time.

 

[Aflaha]

Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim

Dear Sister,

A Muslim man can marry up to four wives, but with the condition that he treats all of them equally and is able to fulfill their financial and emotional needs. It is important to note that polygamy is not a mandatory practice in Islam, but rather a permission granted under certain circumstances. Here, based on your saying, your father is frustrated and out of frustration, he is compelled to marry another wife so that he can raise more children.

I am not so knowledgeable but I can offer you some solutions:

Due to this my father is extremely frustrated with us including my mom and blaming her that it is her fault for not raising us well and none of us sisters are interested in marriage. He thinks we are just bunch of failures and that's why he wants to marry again to have more children.

I support early marriage for the benefits of individuals and the society. There are many benefits to this. In modern times, marriage has become hard but illegal relationships have become so easy and that's why, we see problems in our Muslim ummah. I suggest you talk to your father nicely and try to convince him that you are trying your best to get married. Also, tell him that you are serious about getting married. As you are the eldest, convey the benefits of early marriage to your younger sisters.

Your father must know liability of raising children is not only on the mothers. If he thinks his children aren't raised properly, he's equally responsible for this. And because of this failure on his side, even if he marries another woman and raise more kids, he will face the same issue. We don't raise fingers on us rather we are so quick to blame the other party.
I suggest you bring someone eldest in your family and request him to convey this message to both your father and mother. A senior family member whom both your father and mother like can point out all this issues and offer solutions.

I wish you all the best in getting a perfect spouse both for this duniya and Akirah.

Wassalam