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i dont no wat to do about this as i want to go about it in a halal way,this boy i know asked me to marry him but becuase i was in a bad state i said no to the proposal, even though i liked him alot and i know he felt the same i was to shy to say yes because he never asked me himself and got some1 else to tell me and i thought it wuld be better if nobody knew unless we agreed to it. but now am really regretinng it and wish i had done it, i always see him and wanna get in contact with him to see if he still wanted to but i dont know how to get in contact with him, and i wouldnt want my parents knowing unless we both have agreed on it.help please!
jazak Allahu khair !
 
AssalamuAlaykum

Sis if you've made Istikhara and you're +ve that this is the way to go then maybe you need to speak with the person who first bought you the proposal... get them to ask if that dude still feels the same. After that comes step 2- Talk to your parents.

Quite simple really. All the best sis.

WassalamuAlaykum
 
:salamext:

1) Breathe.

2) Shouldn't his parents have approached your parents for the proposal? As if you are communicating with him behind your parents back, that is haraam. And nothing good can come out of relationships that started haraam in the first place.
 
- Serene - said:
2) Shouldn't his parents have approached your parents for the proposal? .
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AssalamuAlaykum

Thats true sis, and something that didnt come to my mind. JazakAllah Khayr. Although maybe that was going to be his next step? Wallahu A'lam.

WassalamuAlaykum
 
is parents never approached my parents because he wanted to know wether i was already getting married to save getting confused later on, and i wouldnt want my parents knowing unless i had agreed to it
 
:salamext:

But sis you communicating with a non mahram like that is straight up haraam. If you want to get married to him then tell him to get his parents to ask for your proposal. The more you talk to him without your parents knowing or even with your parents knowing, the more you are sinning.
 
- Serene - said:
:salamext:

But sis you communicating with a non mahram like that is straight up haraam. If you want to get married to him then tell him to get his parents to ask for your proposal. The more you talk to him without your parents knowing or even with your parents knowing, the more you are sinning.
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AssalamuAlaykum

They're communicating through a third person right? Also it doesnt seem to be communication as such if she doesnt know whether or not the proposal still stands.

You said he got somebody else to ask you, was it a sis? If yeah then talk to her insha'Allah and then get him to go through parents Insha'Allah

WassalamuAlaykum
 
Because you are seeing him, write to a paper :" My answer is yes." and give it to him He is muslim too , so he knows the steps.
 
as salaam ma alakyaaam

take it step by step, first of all make sure you can contact the guy, and make sure you know that he is still interest, and do this through the person he asked you through

if everythin is all yippee yay, tell your parents, he will tell his and then woo hoo!!

however, if its not like that, then it might be sad for time, but remember whateva happens, happens for a reason, and as they say there are plenty of people out there!!


good luck!!
 
chacha_jalebi said:
however, if its not like that, then it might be sad for time, but remember whateva happens, happens for a reason, and as they say there are plenty of people out there!!


good luck!!
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He wanted to be her husband. Thats a serious commitment, so he can't change his mind or forget her so soon.
 
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Tania said:
He wanted to be her husband. Thats a serious commitment, so he can't change his mind or forget her so soon.
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offcourse he cant and he shouldnt and if he does he deserves to be beaten up, but he was rejected and that could have hurt his self esteem innay lol, you know how some people are get up all the courage to ask and then they are rejected and then you see them in 3 yrs time and they are wananbe gangstas :muddlehea
 
^ I agree with you. Rejecting a man really damages his ego, and yunno men and their egos. Also who is the middle person? Is he someone who can put in a good word on your behalf and pursuade him to ask your parents.