Dear Sister In Islam
Unfortunately your predicament is based on a misunderstanding of what a Munafiq really is. It’s a common problem these days hence it usage has become a Fitn upon our societies.
The term Munafiq is more about a persons belief in a matter & Aqeeda rather that his action alone.
In the time of our prophet SAW, The munafiqeen were those people who portrayed one belief in one gathering and then portrayed another belief in another gathering YET held the one consistent belief in both gatherings. The part that I underlined is the part many people misunderstand or are oblivious of.
If someone is committing Zina (lets say a long winded out affair) and believes it is wrong, and repents after each time. At the same time he meets friends in a coffee shop every Monday – and the topic of Zina comes up in a group discussion. If this person now joins in and says Zina is haram – then this person is not a Munafiq. Simply because his belief about Zina has been consistent (That it is a sin) even-though his own Nafs has fell into weakness.
What will be considered as Nifaq is
If he either believes that the Zina whilst with another woman is somehow miraculously “Halaal” and then suddenly believes its haram in the coffee shop in front of his friends
OR
He believes the Zina with the woman is Haraam but in the coffee shops now instigates his friends to have affairs because its seemingly right or cool or whatever.
Now in both cases above you can see there is an inconsistent belief depending on the group or person he is with. This is Nifaq.
The further proof in the matter is: We All know that Allah SWT promises that the Munafiqs will be thrown in the very bottom of Hell, but at the same time we also know from Quran and Hadith that different types of punishments will be rendered for different Sins. You can research a lengthy Ahadith regarding what the prophet SAW witnessed on the night of Mehraj. It now raises the question that if every act of disobedience was regarded as Nifaq then why is Allah SWT rendering a different punishment for each sin rather than just regarding the person as Munafiq and sending them to the bottomless pit of hell?
The simple answer is that every act of disobedience doesn’t necessitate to an act of Nifaq and being a Munafiq. If this was the case then it would be raising a direct contradiction in the justice of Allah SWT yet believing that he Alone is Al-Adl (The most Just)
If a person is in a sin or have sinned – there is no restriction in Islam that forbids him or her from promoting what is right and forbidding what is evil. Unfortunately the Ummah today cannot see a blessing if it hits them in the face. If a person (Muslim) is an Alcoholic and meets a group of youngsters – would you rather have the Alcoholic promote or demote Alcoholism ?
If Islam forbids the rectification of society based on a persons past or present errors – then ask yourself which Aalim, Aalima, Mufti, Qari, Muhadith, Mufasir today is free from sin ? If Islam promoted this ridiculous ideology – it would then mean that no one single Aalim or Aalima can ever promote the entire spectrum of deen, they would have to now logically based on that principal omit that part of Islam. Example: Lets say a Aalim once in his weakness stole money in a transaction. Does that mean that he can never ever demote theft from the Mimbar for the rest of his life? How ridiculous is that? What is he supposed to do, now go and investigate which Aalim hasn’t committed theft and get that new Aalim to fill in for the Mimbar on that Friday and talk about Theft? The cycle will continue because if that new Aalim now once committed another sin in his life like Zina- then he will be restricted so on and so forth.
The point being is what I have mentioned in the above paragraph is far fetched and an unsustainable module – which now raises the next question, that if were to give Ulema the right of promoting right and forbidding evil – then why can’t the simple Muslim do it too?
So whatever sin you have committed Sister in Islam with this guy – remember we all are sinners. You are not a Munafiq if you now stand for what is Haq from what is Baatil. Allah SWT has given you that right although he knows we all sinners.
Supernova.
