I am desperate for help and in misery, please make duah for me

[London2012]

I disobeyed Allah For 2 years straight I disobeyed my Lord and engaged in copious amounts of Marijuana smoking. I smoked so much that one day I developed a disorder called "Depersonalization/Derealization/Dissociation disorder".

My brain basically feels its fake, I feel numb and I have no concentration or memory. It is a living hell and it basically feels like you are not alive 24/7. It is a horrilble mental disorder.

The only one that can help me is Allah, and I have been trying my best to become more and more religous by praying, reading quran, and keeping Allah on my mind constantly, not blaming him for how I am feeling but simply seeking healing from him.

I swear by Allah that if I were to be healed permanently, I would never go near Marijuana again and smoke it. There are no medications for this disorder and little is known about it.

But I need some help from all my fellow brothers and sisters, I am in desperate situation and it has gotten so bad that I have thought of (asturgfallah) taking my own life due to the mental anguish and pain. I just want to go back to how I used to feel, to see and comprehend like a normal human being.

Please my brothers and sisters, make dua that Allah heals my brain of this disorder permanently, and that along with this I never go close to Marijuana again. Please my brothers and sisters I want to repeat this again and again, please make Dua to our Lord so that he may heal me from this disorder.

 

[ardianto]

I still remember one moment when I was a young adult. I was in a house, sat in a room behind a desk. On the opposite side were other guest, a rockstar and his assistant. And on the desk? ... a kilo of marijuana!

The rockstar and his assistant were busy in rolled up that marijuana became ready to smoke marijuana roll. But I was not interested to ask one. I had stopped smoking marijuana and did not want to do it again.

Yes, bro, you can stop smoking marijuana too if you have strong motivation.

Do not regard yourself as a person with mental disorder. It will make you hard to stop because you feel sorry to yourself and you will always have reason to smoke marijuana again.

You are still normal human being. You are still able to stop.

What you should do now is determine your life direction and destination, what will you be in the future. And start this journey right now. And I very suggest you to active in an activity like hobby.

Change your friends. Leave your wrong friends and try to closer to the right friends. I understand if you feel worry of rejection from the good people if you try to close to the them. Indeed, rejection from good people is one factor that make people like you hard to stop using marijuana or drug. But there's must be few people who can understand you. And later other people will realize too that you have been changed into better person.

Let me honest. Only Allah and yourself who can help you. If you don't have strong motivation, you will not succeed.

May Allah give you easiness and strong motivation.

 

[Muslim Woman]

Salaam bro ,


offer ur sincere repentance to Allah , keep praying to Him for help . In'sha Allah u won't repeat the mistakes.

Say: "O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah: for Allah forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.


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