I can scream and cry but never will i be heard

[t_2]

just really really need some help and advice i really dont know what has happened to me i cant find answers to anything to why its all has happened to me.

Early this year i had to get married due to several circumstances i wasnt ready but i knew i had to go through with it i dont knwo what i was thinking i dont knw how i let people talk me into it i dont knwo how i became so weak. I dont blame anyone i only blame my self i wasnt forced i gave my permission. But now its happened i just cant find any happiness in it now im the one left to suffer everyone in my family is happy except me.

I lost the person i am im not the way i used to be im always depressed and every morning i wake up wishing i wasnt hear every day is like a another long struggle.

It just feels like im the only one feeling like this i cant speak to my friends or family about it they just dont understand everyone just expects me to get on with it.

I just wanted to knw has anyone been in similar situation and how do you deal with it. I just feel like my life is over what more is there for me to have hope for i know main purpose is to praise Allah and yes i have been praying and praying but the feeling of no hopes and no dreams is quite difficult to wake up to.

I dont know why this has happened to me i mean i havent always been the best practising person so may be this is my punishment. Than i have this hope that this is a test from allah and one day everything will fal into places and i will see a better day. but the hope doesnt stay for long as each day by day it just feels like a severe punishment.

Is a bad marriage a punishment for all our sins does it only happen to bad people like me or does it happen to good people as well.

 

[Umm Hurairah]

Asalaamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatu,

Subhan Allah sis. It's really sad to hear what you are going through. But in your post, you didn't mention anything about your husband. Did either you or him or anyone in your family pray Istikhara? If not, I advise you to do so as soon as possible Insha Allah.

Also, while people here can offer advice and their point of views, the best thing to do would be to contact a scholar. Here are some websites: Islam Today and Islam Q&A.

May Allah help you, give you sabr, and keep you on the straight path. Ameen Thuma Ameen.

 

[t_2]

No i didnt read isthikara before marriage i know i should have but everything happened so quickly one day i wasnt married and the next day i was it was literally like that really rushed i guess everyone knew my heart wasnt in it so everyone just tried to do everything quick as they can.

But i have prayed isthikara on several occassion but still cant decide i guess such a thing like marriage is not clear us black and white sometimes even if we are hurting there is not much we can do being a girl.

But i just wanted to knw does bad marriages happen to good people as well. Or is it because something bad i i have done thats why this is happening to me, I have been reading the quran there are several quotes that say " you only get what you earn with your own hands". or disbelieving people will taste their punishment in this life in the hereafter. I mean maybe cause i havet always practice to the level i was suppose to thats why all this has happened to me.

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

i cant really advice you sis but in answer to this

I can scream and cry but never will i be heard

if you scream and cry to people, then they wont hear you, but if you cry and scream to Allah, then he can make a way for you out of your difficulties...so just have sabr, and make dua inshallah.