In desparate need

Welcome sis, Masha'Allah there are so many sisters here who are knwoledgeable who will be able to help you Insha'Allah.
 
Thankyou, i need guidance i have not been a great muslim and have commited many mistakes i have hurt my family and broken my mothers heart. Allahumdulillah i have now made it up to my mother and will never hurt her again but i am in a dilema you see a year ago i had found what i thought to be the one for me and i got married to him disragarding my mothers wishes. This man had promised me the world and at 19 years old i left home and married him but without a parents blessing a marriage is nothing and so allah taught me this the hard way. He would beat me and do a number of other horrible things and my mother would not apeak to me i stayed with him tried to make it work and convinced myself he would change, he would drink and make me do the same and eat haram food like bacon ham etc he has done alot to me and eing the youngest in my family i was always spolit and treated like a princess so this was all a shock to me finally a year later i have changed my ways and i finally sent him back with hes father and came back home to mother i begged her for forgiveness and done taubah or all my bad deeds i am now reformed and want to move on i am not that same young girl i once was and i shamed my family so much i can never forgive myself for that but now my husband and hes family are ignoring my messages and phone calls and i am stuck i dont know what do to i want to end my marriage but they will not take notice of me i have bot got a penny from him and i live off my mum i just want to get rid of him because he made me bad and took me away on false pretenses i am now 20 years of age nearly 21 i need advice on what i can do? I thank allah everyday for giving me a chance to make it up to everyone and to have taught me this lesson but i am so depressed and cry every day because i cant get rid of this big burden.
 
Muslim women said:
Thankyou, i need guidance i have not been a great muslim and have commited many mistakes i have hurt my family and broken my mothers heart. Allahumdulillah i have now made it up to my mother and will never hurt her again but i am in a dilema you see a year ago i had found what i thought to be the one for me and i got married to him disragarding my mothers wishes. This man had promised me the world and at 19 years old i left home and married him but without a parents blessing a marriage is nothing and so allah taught me this the hard way. He would beat me and do a number of other horrible things and my mother would not apeak to me i stayed with him tried to make it work and convinced myself he would change, he would drink and make me do the same and eat haram food like bacon ham etc he has done alot to me and eing the youngest in my family i was always spolit and treated like a princess so this was all a shock to me finally a year later i have changed my ways and i finally sent him back with hes father and came back home to mother i begged her for forgiveness and done taubah or all my bad deeds i am now reformed and want to move on i am not that same young girl i once was and i shamed my family so much i can never forgive myself for that but now my husband and hes family are ignoring my messages and phone calls and i am stuck i dont know what do to i want to end my marriage but they will not take notice of me i have bot got a penny from him and i live off my mum i just want to get rid of him because he made me bad and took me away on false pretenses i am now 20 years of age nearly 21 i need advice on what i can do? I thank allah everyday for giving me a chance to make it up to everyone and to have taught me this lesson but i am so depressed and cry every day because i cant get rid of this big burden.
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Good to hear you have made taubah, now get khula and move on.
 
I dont know to do any that and no1 will take me seriously i am stuck and have been made to feel like outcast but i accept all that i am given as i deserve to be punished for my deeds but i really do not know who to contact or even how to do a divorce
 
Muslim women said:
I dont know to do any that and no1 will take me seriously i am stuck and have been made to feel like outcast but i accept all that i am given as i deserve to be punished for my deeds but i really do not know who to contact or even how to do a divorce
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Contact the local imam or Ulema council they should be able to assist. For english law divorces you'd probably need or lawyer or something I dunno.
 
Assalamu Alaikum sis,

Welcome to the forums, and Alhemdulilah that Allah has guided you, may He increase your iman and forgive you of all your sins Ameen.

I want to ask you, was your father a witness to your marriage (was he there when you signed the marriage contract)? Did you have a proper nikah done?
 
Assalamualaikum

Don't worry sis he have to give you divorce and all legal proceedings as you know he can't marry anyone unless you both have a divorce. I don't know much about it but I think other members can help in this matter.

Till then you should concentrate and stress on your religious matters. You will feel peace in your heart and Allah is the only one who knows what you have gone through and He is one who loves His slaves.

Your faith is in your own hands. You have to improve yourself for your religion. You can tell your hardships to Allah ask him and never loose hope. Everything good or bad that happened with you will have a great impact on you you can decide whether it is positive or negative. You just need to see good in everything you should always expect good from Allah. Here are some of the things which you can do.

Motivate yourself with the help of Quran and hadith.

Remember Allah he is the best planner and the one who knows all your problems.

Enjoin good and forbid the evil.

You can listen to Quran recitation with translation and remember this world is going to end really soon. We all should die as a good Muslim and die striving to be one.

Allah loves you he wants you to remember him during your trials and at the time of happiness.

Be slow but consistent take one thing at a time and believe praying to your lord whole heartedly is the best thing you can do to make yourself happy. You can also try helping others and making them happy.

If you have time readthis post.
 
Salam thank you sister and unfortunatly my dad has passed away 3 years ago, i have no male role figure in my family hence why him and hes father are not taking me seriously and ignoring me as he has said i can not do anything as i have no dad ir brother to back me up. I have pleaded and even begged but they just ignore me is there a number or anything that i could call regarding this i have not married him by law but i have done the nikaah i want to end this once and for all because inshallah i want to go hajj but i cant with this hanging over me
 
I suggest inshallah to go to a sheikh and speak to him about this. It could possibly be that your marriage is invalid because if your father has passed away (may allah have mercy on his soul and forgive his sins ameen), then your brother or someone from one of your uncle's from your father's side should replace him. Since you had no appropriate wali, your marriage could be invalid.

You should just continue to increase your deen and try to show your mother as much love and respect as possible. Take care of yourself, and forget about your husband. If there is nothing that you need from him, then do not try to contact him as he does not deserve it nor is worth any of your time or tears. Maybe you should try to find a job or go back to school so that you can feel more independent and help out with the family. Keep making du'a to Allah that he ease your affairs and your heart.

Do not feel hopeless my dear sister, after every difficulty there is ease inshallah!
 
Sis if you are in the UK try the Citizens Advise Centre if I rememver correctly they have an Islamic section where the sisters there will be able to help Insha'Allah.

Btw nobody here can judge you, only Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala can. Implement the five piilars of Islam in your life and you will find inner peace and strength. There is nothing like coming closer to Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala. We all make mistakes and the important thing is that we learn from it.

With regard to mum always respect and obey her. Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala tells us in the Holy Qur'an that we are to be dutiful to them and to look after them in old age. The only time we are to disobey them are if they force you to worship anything other than Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala.

Read the Holy Qur'an daily, there are massive amounts of reward for that.
 
Thank you sister i will take each one of your comments into consideration may allah shower you all with happiness inshallah and i will continue to make my deen strong and keep my mother happy inshallah, but now i ask allah for guidance and to help me with my situation. I feel like i am trapped and have no way out it is hard for women to give a divorce and there is not much information online forna young muslim like myself who dosent know alot about islam but i have messaged the citizen advice email so please pray for me that i receive the right help to get my divorce and i shall also pray for you all
 

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