In love

[AnonymousPoster]

People can try to destroy my hope - but no one will succeed as I trust Allah - and Allah knows best.

Jazakallah

 

[farhan2]

Assalamualaykum

some good advice alhamdulillah, but many of you are forgetting a key factor that which you can use as a benefit sister AnonymousGender.

We are now in the last 10 days of Ramadan. The most blessed days of every year Allah allows us to be in.

So what does this mean?... it is time for you to sinsearly use and utilise this time to the best of your ability.

Pray istikhara as you have been, make pleanty of SINSEAR DUA. Humble yourself to show and present to Allah that you have understood and accept the mistakes that you may have made previously and ask Allah to forgive all. And make dua that not only to ask Allah that he may present to you this brother for marriage.... BUT better to ASK ALLAH to give you what he sees best fit for you.. that is most important.

many people tend to make dua saying I this, I that, I want, I need,...... etc... but also for one to be a little more wiser to what they are asking, (this is something you learn further as you study the deen further and become a student of knowledge) i.e. you ask Allah again to give you what he sees best fit.

YES DUA CAN CHANGE QADR to an extent, its only with your true sinserity that will help you with it. But also realise that its not good to over depress one self for too long. yes its only human..

HENCE why I remind you of these last 10 days.. use it wisely ..

also something I know that helps is that if you INCREASE IN YOUR IBADAH it really does help a lot inshALlah

please forgive me if I may have said anything wrong and inshAllah remain patient.

 

[Rasema]

Don't force him to marry you,then your marrage will be disaster.

Love blinds you, hon. If he doesn't want you look for someone with qualities of a true Muslim man.

 

[GuestFellow]

I am totally in love in with a muslim brother and would like to marry him. we were in a pre-marital relationhsip for 2 years and now we do not talk and i am scared he will marry someone else. I would really like to be his wife and do it properly but we do not talk anymore and i am scared he is with someone else.

im am prayin my heart and soul out that we can marry

Please do not tell me to move on

Asslamu Aliakum.

First pre-martial relationship is haram. Second if he is not talking to you, he probably lost interest in you. So I suggest finding a better Muslim brother who you can marry and one who is responsible.

For an individual to indulge in pre-martial relationship does not sound responsible to me when it is explicitly clear in our religion, pre-martial relationship is haram!

You have the following options:

1. Get married to him.
2. Don't get married to him.

You have your whole life ahead of you. It is your choice. Keep in mind the partner you will choose will be with you for the rest of your entire life until either one of you die. I would recommend finding a better Muslim brother who is responsible, knowledgeable about Islam and is a proper practising Muslim.

Your free to choose.

Good luck...

 

[Snowflake]

People can try to destroy my hope - but no one will succeed as I trust Allah - and Allah knows best.

Jazakallah

What will anyone achieve by doing that? No one is trying to destroy your hope sis. Do you think only the people who say what you want, are the ones who care? And the ones who say anything else don't? Sis, it's a lot easier to say something someone wants to hear than to say something they don't and risk being hated for it - and that for their benefit too. I just don't want you wasting your life on something that may never be.

If this bro wanted to marry you, but there were other difficulties hindering marriage, I'd encourage you to make dua. But he doesn't. And, if it was good for you then why didn't marriage take place when both were willing? Rather Allah turned you away from each other. Isn't that something to dwell on? If Allah has turned you away from each other then you should accept that He did so because He knows best.


At the end of the day sis, only you can decide what you want to do. But it doesn't seem right to me to make dua for a person to love you when they've already made it clear they don't. What about their choice? Yes, Allah has given us duaa as a weapon. But using it to take away someone'e choice? I thought love was about respecting the choices of the other. I'm sorry sis, I pray Allah gives you more happiness than you could imagine. Ameen.But astaghfirullah, I don't think I'll ever understand love that thinks of itself.

 

[cat eyes]

What will anyone achieve by doing that? No one is trying to destroy your hope sis. Do you think only the people who say what you want, are the ones who care? And the ones who say anything else don't? Sis, it's a lot easier to say something someone wants to hear than to say something they don't and risk being hated for it - and that for their benefit too. I just don't want you wasting your life on something that may never be.

If this bro wanted to marry you, but there were other difficulties hindering marriage, I'd encourage you to make dua. But he doesn't. And, if it was good for you then why didn't marriage take place when both were willing? Rather Allah turned you away from each other. Isn't that something to dwell on? If Allah has turned you away from each other then you should accept that He did so because He knows best.


At the end of the day sis, only you can decide what you want to do. But it doesn't seem right to me to make dua for a person to love you when they've already made it clear they don't. What about their choice? Yes, Allah has given us duaa as a weapon. But using it to take away someone'e choice? I thought love was about respecting the choices of the other. I'm sorry sis, I pray Allah gives you more happiness than you could imagine. Ameen.But astaghfirullah, I don't think I'll ever understand love that thinks of itself.

sis sometimes when i read the stories on this forum or even from people in my community i think people lost the true meaning of love imsad
If you love some one why would you Attempt to turn them from the path of Allah and make them do haraam things for there pure desire and enjoyment. why risk putting them in the helfire? is that love. i don't really know! i doubt that love.. then if thats love that love is evil in my eyes. even if i was tempted to do such things, i would even question my OWN feelings about this guy. sis you always give good advice mashallaah.

and to the anonymous sister we only want the best for you in the end. we don't set out to ruin anybodies hope but listen to the advice we are giving you and inshallaah you will come to know

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

sis sometimes when i read the stories on this forum or even from people in my community i think people lost the true meaning of love imsad
If you love some one why would you Attempt to turn them from the path of Allah and make them do haraam things for there pure desire and enjoyment. why risk putting them in the helfire? is that love. i don't really know! i doubt that love.. then if thats love that love is evil in my eyes. even if i was tempted to do such things, i would even question my OWN feelings about this guy. sis you always give good advice mashallaah.

and to the anonymous sister we only want the best for you in the end. we don't set out to ruin anybodies hope but listen to the advice we are giving you and inshallaah you will come to know

agreed


pre-marital relations is one of the most seductive temptations of shaytan. If its meant to be - it will be no matter how far you remove yourself

believe in that. Trust in that


and live halal...

 

[Intisar]

Sis, there's really no point in trying to change his mind. He doesn't want to talk to you, and you don't really choose who you love. So make du'a, make use of your time and use it more efficiently. Like someone already said in this thread, we are in the last 10 days of Ramadan alhamdulilah. We should be grateful that we've been blessed enough to even reach this.

Move on. That's the best advice I can give. And don't bother trying to get through to him because it will most likely lead to haraam. And maybe the brother told you not to call him in order to prevent that from happening inshaAllaah?

If you really wanna get married, then do so. Just remember that it doesn't have to be with him! You don't even necessarily have to be married in this life, love isn't the end all be all. Besides, if you do keep yourself busy with trying to engage in good acts (and attain more good deeds), Allaah might just grant you jannah. Then you'd probably think of how petty this was. Seriously. A lot of people go through worse.

You can live without him. It's possible. Check your pulse. If your heart's still pumping then mission accomplished.

Turn to Allaah. Make him your bestfriend. Cause at the end of the day you should only be relying on Allaah.

:wa:

 

[cat eyes]

agreed


pre-marital relations is one of the most seductive temptations of shaytan. If its meant to be - it will be no matter how far you remove yourself

believe in that. Trust in that


and live halal...

inshallaah.

it dose sicken me thinking about it and imagining Allah taking your soul when you are doing haraam. we are blessed we came this far. hew

 

[Alphadude]

I am totally in love in with a muslim brother and would like to marry him. we were in a pre-marital relationhsip for 2 years and now we do not talk and i am scared he will marry someone else. I would really like to be his wife and do it properly but we do not talk anymore and i am scared he is with someone else.

im am prayin my heart and soul out that we can marry

Please do not tell me to move on

first your in haraam relationship i mean was for 2 years right?

i dont understand some people they are muslims and still they go for the haraam relationship then when they broke up they come to islamic forums or websites asking for help, if this was a proper islamic relationship this wouldnt be happing.
and why didnt you got married instead of BF ?

if he does not want you then u better leave him alone sorry but this is how it works even if you talk to the family but the person does not want then there is no way of working it out.

 

[zakirs]

sis ..

since you seem to be so impatient first take a deep breath..

there is a saying that more you wish for a thing the more it goes away.So stop longing for him.You have two options right ?

1) ask for him using your parents
2)forget him and MOVE ON


you try the option one and if he is uninterested all you can do is pray that he change his mind.And you have to *eventually* move on.There are more things important in life other than love ;like imaan , parents , career , fun , food.Love these things and enjoy them (which i assume you havent been doing since you are missing him).Pray to Allah and leave the rest.

So take a deep breath and enjoy other things in life Allah has blessed upon us .

 

[syilla]

ukhtee...try writing down 30 bad things about him. Probably that can help you out.

 

[AnonymousPoster]

first your in haraam relationship i mean was for 2 years right?

i dont understand some people they are muslims and still they go for the haraam relationship then when they broke up they come to islamic forums or websites asking for help, if this was a proper islamic relationship this wouldnt be happing.
and why didnt you got married instead of BF ?

if he does not want you then u better leave him alone sorry but this is how it works even if you talk to the family but the person does not want then there is no way of working it out.

Firstly YES it was a Haraam Relationship - I know that - and i have severly repented and I have learnt my lesson. I dont know why you are being so **** critical - if you dont want to help then dont. I came onto this forum, not to be criticised by the likes of you.

ONLY Allah can judge me NOT YOU and ONLY Allah knows everything and Allah will do what is best for me.

 

[AnonymousPoster]

Assalamualaykum

some good advice alhamdulillah, but many of you are forgetting a key factor that which you can use as a benefit sister AnonymousGender.

We are now in the last 10 days of Ramadan. The most blessed days of every year Allah allows us to be in.

So what does this mean?... it is time for you to sinsearly use and utilise this time to the best of your ability.

Pray istikhara as you have been, make pleanty of SINSEAR DUA. Humble yourself to show and present to Allah that you have understood and accept the mistakes that you may have made previously and ask Allah to forgive all. And make dua that not only to ask Allah that he may present to you this brother for marriage.... BUT better to ASK ALLAH to give you what he sees best fit for you.. that is most important.

many people tend to make dua saying I this, I that, I want, I need,...... etc... but also for one to be a little more wiser to what they are asking, (this is something you learn further as you study the deen further and become a student of knowledge) i.e. you ask Allah again to give you what he sees best fit.

YES DUA CAN CHANGE QADR to an extent, its only with your true sinserity that will help you with it. But also realise that its not good to over depress one self for too long. yes its only human..

HENCE why I remind you of these last 10 days.. use it wisely ..

also something I know that helps is that if you INCREASE IN YOUR IBADAH it really does help a lot inshALlah

please forgive me if I may have said anything wrong and inshAllah remain patient.

This is the best advice given. thank you so much.

Please can i request this thread to be closed by a moderator. Thank you

JazakAllah

 

[crayon]

Thread closed.